What is it about doing things that are in our traditions that other people find so
repulsive? Are we so brainwashed by western culture that we fail to identify with our own? I don’t ask this lightly because on the one hand we swear that we are Africans and we have found our identity but on the other hand we are so pro colonizer its madness to even think that we can survive on our own. Polygamy being looked down upon is something that came with modern society. Men with many wives are looked down upon because well, it’s not what the bible says. Note this is from the churches that think they are better than other churches even though they probably have less people than the churches that practice it. Don’t be fooled even amongst churches there are some that behave like they went to private school and mock those ones that don’t put them on a pedestal. My mother being a Roman Catholic, well once upon a time so rather let me see having grown up Roman Catholic was one of those who looked down on everything not it. She had her moments true when she gave in to her black side but all in all she was better than others.
“Ok then I will leave. I am glad you are home and you are safe!”
I told her as I walked out. I am not going to pretend that I had expected her to welcome that polygamy news with open arms. She was my mother and I knew her which explains why I had been so reluctant to do it in the first place. When I got to the car I got a call from Mr. Gumbi,
“Where are you I have been waiting?”
He asked me sounding impatient. This man was to be my father in law someday and he already scared me like this. This was not going to end well.
“I had to stop by my mother’s but I am on my way!”
I told him.
“Ok then. I have another meeting so please rush. Naledi won’t be joining us though because I wanted to talk to you about something!”
He advised me. I was not sure what he wanted to talk to me about but I was not happy that Naledi had agreed with her father without consulting me. When I got to his office he was alone.
“My boy you look stressed what’s wrong?”
He asked me as I sat down.
“I am ok sir. I am sorry to have called for this meeting at such short notice though.”
I told him as I sat down.
“No problem I had time let’s talk what’s on your mind?”
He asked me.
“I wanted to know when we will start the project because the days are moving. I have some ideas on how we should move!”
I told him.
“That great you can send them through to me but I thought you knew?”
He said the look on his face changing.
“I don’t understand sir, knew what?”
I asked him.
“Well you have a case that we are trying to squash right now so you can’t be near this project because imagine how the media will take this if they found out that a contract went out to the rival of a man who was murdered?”
He asked me. The question was pure and simple but it hit home. He made so much sense but even me being a business novice I knew when I was being played and this stage I was being played.
“Sir I lost my job because of this project and by the sounds of it you are saying I am about to lose this too!”
I asked him.
“You are not losing it but if you stay on fully involved it means that we could all lose this! Is that what you want?”
He asked me. This man had no shame. I could see exactly through him. He was cutting me out after I had won him the project. How could he even do that to the man marrying his daughter?
“I killed no one so I don’t care what you say. I am part of this project Naledi and I so please don’t give us reason to argue on this!”
I told him standing up for myself.
“I am going to call a meeting with everyone else. It’s up to you to attend because we are moving forward together. There will be many more projects to be won so don’t discard us like we mean nothing!”
I told him. He just stared at me as I stood up and left. I had clearly challenged him but this man was crazy because as was I had lost everything because of this deal now he was trying to screw me over.
“Naledi we need to talk where are you?”
I asked her.
“I am having lunch with a friend!”
She told me.
“A friend where?”
I asked her.
“I am at Greenstone why?”
She asked me.
“I am coming there now its important!”
I told her.
“Ok then will be here!”
She told me. I drove straight to her. This is what happens when you trust the wrong people and in her father I had done that. When I got to Greenstone she was at Cappuccino.
“Where is your friend?”
I asked her because she was sitting alone.
“She went to the bathroom. What was so urgent that you would want to come out to disturb my lunch?”
I asked her.
“Ok then your father wants to screw me or us over I don’t know. He is now sidelining us from the tender and says we can’t be involved!”
I told her.
“Why am I not surprised? That’s my father for you. He destroys everything he builds because of his greed. He does not care for anyone but himself. Look at my mother. See how she is suffering when my father can do so much for her!”
She said taking her phone out.
“No what are you doing?”
I asked her.
“I am calling him. He can’t do this to us and we should not allow it to happen!”
She said and by the sounds of it she was getting angry as she said it.
“We need to have a strategy and not react on emotion. Your father is a clever man and if he has done this before then he did it to people who were even cleverer than us in this tender world. We can’t therefore assume that you giving him a piece of your mind and it will work out!”
I warned her. She put her phone down because I thing I had gotten through to her.
“Oh sit this is so messed up!”
“Hi Vusi what are you doing here?”
A voice said from behind me. I turned around and there was Nobuhle my neighbor.
I said confused.
“Wait! This was your fiancé the one you have been talking about?”
She asked me in disbelief.
She obviously did not know our situation and clearly she was better than yesterday.
“Wait do you guys know each other?”
Naledi asked. I was not going to say anything I wanted to see how she would react. Either she would play it cool to not get involved or she would get crazy about it.
“Nigger what the fuck!”
She said using the dreaded N word but don’t all these people who think they are cool use it.
Naledi asked confused,
“This guy is my neighbor and he is very married to a friend of mind. Vusi what’s wrong with you? Londiwe is always pining over you and now you go on get engaged to another woman under her nose! Are you crazy?”
She said raising her voice so much so that people turned to look.
“No no no Nobuhle it’s not like that Vusi explain to her please!”
She said intervening.
“He has nothing to explain. Naledi don’t marry this guy shame on you Vusi honestly no man you can’t do that such things. I thought you were one of the last remaining good guys but that doesn’t exist anymore. I am so ashamed of you right now and I am angry. I am not going to tell Londiwe it’s not my part but you must tell her what you have done here. I can’t believe you!”
“Nobuhle calm down!”
I told her.
“I don’t want to calm down this is fucked up dude!”
She said. It’s amazing that this was the woman who had been trying to seduce me or at least I think she was yet when it was her not benefiting from the situation she was the one losing it. That’s what most women do; they hate guys who cheat with a passion but if its them or their friend who is cheating on a guy then its fine. They will find every reason why she is justified and will even remind you how men have been cheating for years and how a girl just wants to have a bit of fun.
“Nobuhle calm down, Londiwe knows and she too is getting married to use. All three of us are going to be in a plural marriage and from here we are going to her place! I didn’t even know you neighbors!”
Naledi said to her. Nobuhle stared at us as though unsure how to digest what exactly had been said but it was not going down well with her. It was like we had told her Greek,
“I mean what? I know Londiwe is from deep KZN but would she allow that?”
She asked out loud.
“Yes. It was her idea even so no one is trying to hurt anyone else. Just be happy for us please!”
Naledi consoled her friend who was truly and utterly confused. I guess this meant we were going to make the next gossip topic she was going to have with her other friends.
“Uhm ok! I don’t even know what to say, congratulations I guess!”
She said nervously. I honestly don’t blame her but oh well that’s what life is like and life makes you shit bricks at times.
“I am sorry I spoilt your lunch by the way but I had to see her it was important!”
I told Nobuhle.
“Its ok she is your fiancée I understand!”
She did not understand she was lying but I had to prepare myself for this from this day forth. It hit me now that I was going to be at odds with Naledi’s father I did not see him taking this well at all.
“Naledi we are fucked. Imagine if Nobuhle reacted like this what’s going to happen with your dad now!”
I told her, of which Nobuhle burst out,
“He is going to kill you! Guys no offense and I love and respect you both but this is crazy!”
She burst out. He
“What are you thinking?”
She asked throwing her hands in the air. I guess she could not help it but she had a point.
This was a mess.
Michael Nkululeko Maphoto (fb)
Thank you sir for the opportunity to share my story.
I was dating a man for three years and I loved him so much. When I got pregnant he started acting funny and accused me of cheating. He even beat me up for it but it was not true. I had a terrible pregnancy due to the stress and my family was not supportive either. I lived with my aunt and older brother and to both of them I had betrayed their trust. When the baby was born I had nowhere to go because my aunt made it clear I can’t keep the baby in her home. My brother then got me a room to stay in and did his best but he too was struggling. The baby daddy then came back and said that he could not see his child like this and took my baby to his family and they are raising him. He also had another baby I discovered a month younger than mine meaning he had cheated on me during that time. I got a job now which doesn’t pay much but can pay the bills. I want my baby back and now the baby daddy is refusing.
Please advise me on what I can do?