Bazalwane Five

Part Nine

“My wife hates me, my kids hate me but God will never fail me!”

Dumisani told himself after that horrible lunch. They were ungrateful to how much he had achieved for them and always on his throat. He needed to breathe because living under this constant stress was not good for any man. As a man of the cloth he had too many people to keep happy and often no one even bothered to come and ask him if he was doing fine.

“I am going out!”

He announced when he got downstairs but found only his daughter there still sitting on the table where he had left her. She was doing the only thing she seemed really good at and that’s chatting. He never actually had to tell anyone where he was going because being the man of the house meant that they should trust him.

“Daddy people give me a lift to my place. I came with Thando and now I have no ride!”

His daughter asked hum.

“Oh now you want me to take you after all those things you said earlier on?”

He asked her. She had a tendency of snapping at people and never taking ownership of that.

“Daddy come on. Why is it as a family we can never just debate without someone catching feelings?”

She asked him as though oblivious to what had happened earlier on. Stupid child.

“I don’t even know what that means!”

He said walking to the kitchen. He wanted an apple from the fridge to munch on as he drove. She followed him,

“Daddy please! I promise I won’t argue with you in the car and I am sorry that I debated with you earlier on!”

She pleaded with him.

“Can’t your mother take you?”

He asked her because the thought of going across town with her was not nice.

“She has refused already so that’s out!”

Emihle responded already gathering her things to go with him.

“I guess you win!”

He told her when she came down with her bag.

“Thanks daddy you the best!”

She said.

“Which car are we using?”

The daughter asked him.

“The Benz!”

On Sunday drives like this he preferred to drive his old Mercedes Benz because it was first low profile but more importantly criminals don’t target cars like that. He had a Range Rover and a top of the range S Class but driving those cars made him visible to criminals and on Sundays especially that’s when they get excited. It’s easier to run away on an empty road.

“Ah dad come on! When people see me come out of it they will think I am a hobo!”

She protested immediately.

“Then those people can come and take you home!”

He told her folding his arms. She did not have a choice so she grumbled all the way to the car. He stood at the bottom of the stairs and shouted,

“I am taking Emihle home!”

It had just dawned on him that he had the perfect way out today and to avoid the fight when he came back this would work. No one responded not that he cared and he left.

“Remember how we used to have road trips when you were younger?”

He asked his daughter trying to make conversation as she was already chatting again. He wanted to break the tension. He barely managed to get a conversation out of her the whole way and dropping her off just felt like a huge relief. He could finally get on his way and from here it was another 30 minute drive. He put on his Sfiso Ncwane music and got on his way.

“Hi it’s me I am outside!”

He said when he got to his destination.

“Ok cool, I will send you the code!”

A female voice said on the other side of the phone. He got a sms and he entered the code at the gate. He drove in and parked in her parking lot.

“Hello dzaddy!”

She said when she opened the door. She had just turned 24; he knew this because he had bought her that iphone that was charging.

“You have something new to call me everyday do you like have a list of names?”

He asked her teasingly. He kissed her and immediately grabbed her ass. It was that beautiful round ass that had made him talk to her the first time they met and now he owned it.

“Don’t be old and boring! I am all dressed up for you and you say such!”

She said playfully punching him. She was dressed up that’s true but not like someone waiting for her man. She looked very formal in her Sunday best.

“Why are you dressed up like this so, it’s Sunday and it’s our playtime!”

He asked her. He was clearly expecting something different that started with less clothes, lingerie, garters etc. That’s how a scuftin should meet her man at the door!

“I went to church today too I can’t always just sit at home and wait for you!”

She said playfully.

“No that’s good but please I don’t want to hear about church! My day has been hectic enough as it is!”

He told her taking off his watch and already moving on to his shirt.

“Geez give me a break, I cooked talk to me a bit before we just get into bed!”

She said to him.

“You know I can’t be out for too long though so please what do you want us to talk about?”

He asked her annoyed at her.

“I am not a prostitute. I am your girl and you treat me like I am some wannabe slay queen you met on Instagram!”

She said angrily.

“I don’t have Instagram so no! I am sorry though what would you like to talk about?”

He asked her.

“How come you never call me by my name? Do you even know it or there are many of us so you call us by number?”

She asked him taking him by surprise!


He said his name out loud.

“You are being dramatic today! I am leaving!”

Dumisani said and he stood up and walked towards the door.

*Ah baby come on, I am sorry. I am just having a bad day; I didn’t mean to take it out on you!”

She said coming in to kiss him softly on the lips and start unbuttoning his shirt. What he did not notice was that her phone was recording their conversation!

Part Ten

I get why women sometimes say that they were not sorry when their husbands died. There was a time when she would have thought that these words were cruel and such women were evil but marriage conditions you to feel some type of a way. Why not just divorce him some may ask? The truth is the most difficult thing for a woman is often being in love and this is for every woman. Sindi had learned from all those counseling sessions that she had given at church that with women being in a relationship is a fine line between happiness and misery. A lot of women, especially those in long marriages settled for the devil they got and decided that on this one they will work through his bullshit fight argue ignore fix forgive and love. That’s the reality of most marriages. No one is perfect no matter who tells you what and you cannot divorce every man you marry or date because if there were perfect people we would not church and lawyers.


Sindi was shaken out of her thoughts by Ntokozo,

“Yes what’s on your mind?”

She asked her niece. She had heard when her husband said he was leaving and had noted that her daughter had not even bothered to say goodbye.

“I forgot to remind you that you said you wanted to go see Aunty Zodwa today!”

She told her.

“Shit! Why didn’t you remind me?”

She said jumping up immediately. She had gotten so busy and frustrated that she had totally forgotten her promise to Zodwa.

“I am sorry aunty I forgot!”

Ntokozo said sheepishly.

“Nah its fine. Go wear something nicer you are coming with me!”

She told Ntokozo who even though it was before 5 was already in her gown and pajamas.


Her niece responded. Why can’t all kids be like Ntokozo though? She never said no to anything which made her perfect.

“I thought you were no longer coming?”

Zodwa said when she arrived.

“Yeah I almost did not because this is not easy for me as you know!”

Her old friend said to her.

“It’s good to see you though. It’s been too long!”

She told her.

“I know but you know why we don’t hang out, Dumisani doesn’t want you know!”

She explains. She went to school with Zodwa many years ago when they were younger. Whilst she had gone on to marry and leave comfortably Zodwa had ended up in Thembisa doing God knows what. They had reconnected a few years ago when she had been in Pick n Pay at Greenstone and Zodwa had been the teller that served her.

“Do you think it’s too late to go now?”

She asked her.

“Nope, that old woman loves money she will come out at midnight if she has to. Leave your bag and car here because if she sees it she will charge you an arm and a leg!”

She told her.

“But then I am not worried about money I can pay!”

She reassured her.

“Don’t be stupid Sindi, yes you can pay but don’t make yourself a victim because of it. Take r800 and put it on one side and r200 on the other.”

She was advised. She did not argue again because she did not want her naivety to be exposed again. When they left the house Zodwa saw Ntokozo in the car,

“Your daughter can’t come with us you know that right?”

She asked her.

“Of course not. This is meant to be a secret remember!”

She reassured her.

“Ok then so why did you bring her?”

Zodwa asked her.

“I … Well…”

She stuttered,

“You were too scared to come here by yourself? Really Sindi?”

Zodwa asked her and she laughed. It’s a good thing she did too because things would have gotten awkward really fast had she not.

“You don’t understand hey but yes I was scared to drive alone. I have never been here let alone in the evening!”

She explained and she was right. When you live behind high walls in the suburbs the townships are were all the bad stories comes from! It’s no secret that everyone believes that the guys waiting to hijack you at your gate come from the township. It’s a common belief so who could blame her for being scared.

“You grew up in Shawela Sindi and nothing ever happened to you there!”

It’s true she grew up in Soweto but that was a long time ago. Now she was a rich married suburban woman so forgive her please if she was now scared of such areas.

“Let’s just go, how far is it?”

She asked Zodwa as she dropped her things in the car.

“Stay here I won’t be long!”

She told Ntokozo.

“It’s a street away!”

Zodwa responded. It was not far that’s true. They caught up on small talk and reminisced about old friends as they walked. 10 minutes they were there. They knocked on the door and a young boy opened for them,

“Is your grandmother here?”

Zodwa asked her,


The little boy shouted so loudly it startled Sindi. Where she was from people don’t shout that loud for someone in the house unless it’s a life threatening emergency. You don’t scream at people it’s rude and uncultured,

“Hey wena Frank what did I say about screaming like a woman in labor?”

An elderly rebuked the small 7 year old boy, who walked away as she approached,

“Welcome welcome!”

The elderly lady said as she approached them.

“Gogo Ndlovu, this is my friend I said I was bringing!”

Zodwa did the introductions and the two ladies greeted.

“It’s a bit late I have something on the stove. Please meet me at the back of the house I am coming… Frank take them to my office!”

She shouted the very same way he had done earlier and been scolded for. What was with these people and screaming though? Is it a kasi thing?

“This way!”

The annoyed kid said as he led the way,

“Just sit here she is coming!”

He said to them after showing them where to sit. The light was a bit dim and only when she readjusted her eyes did she see all these roots, mats and so on.

“Is this your first visit to a Sangoma?”

Zodwa asked her,


She responded,

“You look scared that’s why?”

Zodwa said and chuckled. She was right about that part! What in the Lords good name was she doing here? What was she thinking? She wanted to stand up and leave but in walked the old lady! This won’t end well.

*************The End*************

Michaelnkululekomaphoto (insta)
Michael Nkululeko Maphoto (fb)

Dear Mike

Thank you for reading my letter and good morning friends.

I am a 43 year old married woman and I have a problem. My husband only seems to want to touch me or have sex with me when he is drunk. This is really hurtful and when I tell him he jokes about it. We have been married 20 years and have 3 children. Sometime last year he told me that because we have been together for so long it’s hard to get excited. That cut me deeply and I actually cried. He is a father and a good husband in all other things except this. What can I do to recreate the spark between us because I have been ‘horny’ for such a long time now?

Thank You


55 thoughts on “Bazalwane Five

  1. Dear Married woman
    Firstly I would suggested that you start exercising either by joining a gym or walking ,
    Do dinner dates with your Hubby
    Dress up and go out with your girls and live a little
    Surprise him with new lingerie
    don’t wait for him to touch you make the first move

  2. I love how much one learns from the stories you tell, the comments as well

    Siyabonga Mnumzane Maphoto, ubusiseke njalo

  3. Bhut Mike posted that he has lost his motivation with writing. I guess anything he writes from now going forward ke favour.

  4. Brother Mike, you got us hooked on this story and disappear on us😢😭😭. Come bek plz, I cant focus @ work at all.

  5. I am starting to see a pattern here seyiba yinjwayelo le yoduka kuka tatalapha sana. Masaziswe bethuna if ziyachithwa intente apha ngoba nale yomane sizojonga it costs us ngoba kukho ne ads ezitya idata kwalapha!

  6. We have to admit that Mike has reached the end of the road with daily doses. It is not his choice but the system that let him start is has worn out. I think it is time he move to different spaces as everything has to change (btw, how many jobs have you changed since he started to write the diary? OK I am talking of your colleague next to you). With all due respect, I don’t see him coming back.
    As he suggested that there could be weekend bloggers, I think it is time we exploit that part of the program. If all of us can write one short story (about three MS Word pages) or few chapters of that story we can send it to him where he (or his team) will publish them every second day. Of course some stories will be boring some will Sci-Fi while some will be intriguing, most will not be at level of Mike.

    NB: COPYRIGHT IS A LAW OF THE REPUBLIC. Don’t make lawyer Mike to break the law.

    PS. I am still thinking of cooking a story to contribute as well.

    It is sour but you can drink it.

  7. I am with you benjani, I’ve been so moody about Mike not posting in such a way that I’m really not focusing at work, my days are really not productive anymore. I think the idea of a weekend blog will work,

    I started reading this diary in 2013, it was just after I got dumped, @ the time I was broken and I thought I couldn’t go on without my boyfriend. A friend advice me to read this diary and that’s how this diary became my distraction,
    I guess i got hooked by this book more than I would love to admit.
    The past few weeks without this diary just made me realise how lonely I am. I guess it’s time to get a boyfriend and move on😞.
    Mike, I’ve learned so much on this diary, I have always been stubborn in a relationship, I have always thought that I have it all and I dont need to beg or be submissive on a man, and yet the bible still say women should be submissive. I looked down on women who allow their boyfriend/ man to tell them what to do. But look where it got me today, I have a house a car and a good job but my life it’s so lonely, I cant even keep a relationship going for too long coz I’m too proud and I’m struggling to change. I’m @ a point where I’m so afraid of growing old.
    Mike thanks for all the years you have been writing this blog, I am certain that it has changed many lives, and I know that ehen I get a boyfriend, I will improve and learn to compromised. GOD BLESS YOU

    1. Mphoz waze wakhuluma nami I am so proud I find it very hard to be submissive to man , I guess some of us will grow old alone. thank you

  8. Guys
    I see there are no weekend bloggers. Can someone suggest some start of a plot then someone will put words into it.

    1. Am interested to know too Wewe. Have u ever read these ones:

      1. Raymond our husband (Book 1 and Book 2)
      2. Diary of a side chick and it has subdiaries such as (a) Marriage on the Rox
      (b) My Nigerian Boo, and
      3. Pieces of My Heart

        1. U can get them on google Tish, just write the name of the read u looking for, e.g:
          Raymond Our
          Diary of Umakhwapheni(side chick) which is the umbrella diary for Marriage on the Rox and My Rich Nigerian Boo

  9. The least Mike could have done was tell us the truth. Just be honest and say, I’m sorry guys I cannot continue the blogs and then we will be like go well! Gosh jst to leave us hanging after years of posts. Flip this pisses me off

  10. It’s been a year but I find myself here checking if Mike didn’t think otherwise. Saddened by the lack of his reads.

  11. Hi guys
    Mike is not here still and you keep coming, so lets make this worth your while by chatting on interesting topics relevant to matters in the blog. My first question (it has been bothering me for a while):
    What do you think of a guy called “Fella in Versace” twitter name “ShadayaKnight”? OK its obvious most women hate him for different reasons, but how do you summarise his views and what you think of them. If you are not on twitter ask your friend, if you are on twitter and you dont know him, cant help.

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