“In the same way, a woman who is no longer or has never been married can be devoted to the Lord and holy in body and spirit. But a married woman has to think about her earthly responnsibilities and how to please her husband. I am saying this to your benefit… I want you to do whatever will help you serve the Lord best, with as few distractions as possible!” I Corinthinans 7: 33 – 35
I still had a lot of questions but I had no time now. My relationship status was important to me so I had to ask before I left.
“Aunty I forgot to ask you, what happens with my relationships now. Do I date just anyone or I must wait to be directed?”
I asked her.
“Look, when you get the water calling which is what you have it means its a very powerful significant calling. It will affect your relationships but you can date. Your ancestors can choose who they want you to marry and will remove any obstruction to that happening for you. However, its something you can choose to fight them on of which they are understanding!”
She explained but now I had to go. I told her of my call and she walked me out. She had given me a lot to think about though. Driving back I was caught in two minds. I was not sure whether to start by going home and changing or just head there straight as I was already late. In the private sector its not unheard of for business to also have a social side and this was it. I was management level, well junior management to be honest meaning the company was going to give me an expense account for it. Its funny how the company had the final say on this contract meaning realistically they should have had the power to remove me from it but they were not.
My sister called me.
“Mum told me what’s going on. Why haven’t you told me?”
She asked me angrily. Its true I had not told her. It was because I had not thought it necessary. Perhaps I was wrong but usually when you are about to have an abortion you don’t tell anyone. I saw how my mother and her sisters relationship had been destroyed by this.
“I know. I have been meaning to tell you but I have just failed to find time. As you can imagine I am not having the best time of it. I am scared Pam! I am scared!”
I told her. I just needed a breather. I needed to catch a break.
“I know you do. We need to go out though. Have you noticed that I am always coming to your place and you never come to mine. Why is that?”
She asked. I did not expect that question since this moment was about me.
“Well because your husband is an idiot that hates me after I beat him up and you also never invite me. Its kind of hard to show up at your place!”
Ever since my sister got married I had never felt welcome in her house. Her husband and I had our issues. I found him pretentious and dishonest. I told her about this and she never paid attention to me.
“You alwats make those excuses though you need something different. This week, dinner at my house! You two need to make up. This fighting really does not do you any justice and I am the one that sufferes from all this because you the two people I love the most!”
She said trying to make me feel guilty.
“You left out mom!”
I reminded and we both laughed.
“I don’t know how I am going to do this on a serious tip. I can’t be this sangoma. Mum wants me to be baptized but I don’t think that will make it go away!”
I confided in her. I almost cried but I could not get to dinner looking somehow.
“Where are you going anyway?”
She asked me.
“To dinner with the bosses and Simba!”
I told her.
“You mean Simba, the Zim guy from the wedding!”
She asked me. My sisster would ask for details in wahtever conversation you were sharing with her. Talking to her was never a sprint but a marathon.
“Yes him. He is doing business with my company so its a business dinner!”
I explained to her.
“Oh ok, maybe you willl get a chance to get to know him better as that will be convenient!”
She said. We laughed a bit and at least she did not bring up the calling again. It was not a pleasant topic right now. We were meeting in Rosebank so I did not struggle for parking. I really needed to freshen up but already they was no time. I as not feeling this dinner. I called Simba ti ask where they were and he gave me directions. Jhb people go out everyday, this place was packed. You would never think that this was a work day. I found him sitting on his own. I switched on my voice recorder as I always do when I meet these people. Safetly first.
“Hey! Sorry I am late! I had a busy afternoon had to go to my aunts but that’s a story for another day!”
I told him as he pulled the chair for me and I sat down. I liked that.
“There I was thinking I have been stood up and left to hang out with Mr. Graaf and Nicolene!”
He said clearly displeased by it all but laughed at the end to show his relief. So Nicolene had been invited too? This was becoming a joke now. I had never been in a situation where there was such aggression to force someone to work on your harmony. Team dynamics are important for the success of any project and this right here, was the wrong dynamic.
“I am here now. Sorry I didn’t get a chance to go home and change. I wish I could have but I got the message late!”
I told her. Note to self, never pick up work calls after hours. I should actually teach myself that. When you answer calls after work you are just inviting trouble.
“Where are they?”
I asked him.
“Nicolene said she left her phone in the car charging and Mr. Graaf escorted her. I didn’t mind though because I needed a breather from them. They get along pretty well for people with such a wide gap in age difference!”
He said as a matter of fact. I would not know though because I did not know Mr. Graaf well. I didn’t read too much into it because funny enough Nicolene was super friendly. She had a way of getting into your face and making you notice her.
“Speak of the devil, there they come!”
He said. I saw them walking in. Nicolene was dressed up as though she was on a date. At work she was a tad bit more conservative so I had never seen her after hours. She was not overdressed but you could see she at least put in effort.
“Ah finally you joining us Miss Mbatha thank you for coming!”
Mr. Graaf said with a smile on his face. With the day I had had I was not going to be tense, I was going to enjoy this moment.
“Yes sir. Sorry I had errands to run but I am here now prime and focused!”
I responded. I smiled as I spoke so that they could see I was at least pretending to be happy to be here.
“Its after hours, you get to let loose a little. Blow off steam so we can all get to know each other. You know when you meet in the office everything is tense and hostile”
He said being nice to me. I remembered the snake in the bible, it was nice to Eve too and look what happened. I wished I could gossip to Simba in Zulu but I was not even sure he would understand.
“Thank you for inviting me.”
Nicolene suddenly said seeing that she was being closed out of the conversation. Its not like she had spoken first.
“You are welcome!”
I said to her even though I had certainly not invited her. Had they lied to her that I had invited her? Poor child!
“So Simba, have they been giving you a good representation of our company?”
I asked him taking charge of the conversation. I did not want Mr. Graaf to lead because he would then go back and say I contributed nothing.
“Yes they are hey. I didn’t realize the full scope you guys head. Mr. Graaf was telling me of your operation in Saldanha Bay that’s very impressive!”
Saldanha Bay? Wasn’t that the government contract we had with Denel? That was top secret and no one was allowed to talk about it. Even I didn’t know its details. Had he crossed a line.
“Yes sir we are a big company. Where is your partner the one who we met you with the first time?”
I asked him.
“Oh him, he is around. He is holding down the fort!”
It was time to change the subject.
“So have you guys already ordered! I am famished but we must also have an early night!’
I told them. I was hungry. I was that girl that could go on a date with someone I didn’t like simply because of the food. I had done it once or twice before and I won’t even hide that I would order the second most expensive thing on the menu. The second most expensive is usually not sea food and I don’t like sea food.
“Yes we have, we were not sure you were still coming!”
Simba said. Dinner was nice. We spoke and laughed and drank. Around 1030pm we called it a night. I had not drank too much so I was safe to drive. When I got to my place I noted that Mbuso’s car was not there in the parking lot. I wonder where he is.
My phone rang.
I said when I picked up.
“I was just checking if you got home ok.”
He said. That was sweet of him. I told him I had and I now needed a long bath then my bed. He said his goodnights without much fuss.
Living alone though peaceful is not always nice. Sometimes you need someone to just hold you and tell you all is well. Now I was staring at the wall and they were staring right back at me.
My phone was ringing. I jumped up because I just wanted someone to talk to. Thank heavens it was Miriam, she always had story.
“Hey, I was thinking of calling you how did you guess it?”
I asked her cheerful.
“Great minds think aline I guess!”
She sounded sad,
“We just got news that Sfiso lost both his baby and his wife. The labour had complications and she had a heart attack. They could not save the baby either!”
She said and there was silence!
I lost all words.
Michael Nkululeko Maphoto (fb)
Thank you sir for reading my letter and greetings to your readers.
I am in love with two girls and they both are in love with me. They know about each other and have sat down and discussed this. I met them both a the same event, a wedding and we hit it off. At the beginning I was playing one against the other until one day they put two and two together and confronted me. They asked me to choose whom I wanted and I couldn’t and I said I wanted the both. I thought that would be the end of me but it was not. They said we should try it. One girl works in a bank and the other is a teacher. I am a doctor. My friends say they did it because of that but these girls seem to be so in love. We are all from Jhb and I am Tswana. My two girls are Sotho and Pedi. We been doing thiis for about two years. We have had our fights and makes even they have fought too and made up so we are strong. Now here comes the problem, Sotho girl is pregnant and Pedi is not. I obviously want my baby but Sotho girl is saying come talk to her parents. They have met me before singularly. Pedi girl is jealous and says she wants a baby too and if I am about to pay lobola for Sotho then I must pay for her too. I get where she is coming from but in my family background there is no pologymamy at all. In fact my father is a deacon I know he is anti it. I can’t abandon my two girls because I love them both, we have been through a lot.
Please anyone advise me on what I can do.
Thank you kindly