There is rhetoric amongst females nowadays that you should not care what other
people think of you. You should not care for their opinions because it’s your life and you live it your way. Those are the same females who when someone else is doing what they do not believe in they will go and gossip about how stupid you are for doing that very thing. It’s amazing really the more you think about it. So Jacob Zuma got another wife. She is 24. She is not a child. She comes from a surprisingly wealthy family. Those are the facts. How do females respond to the good news? They were livid. Forgotten was that this was a young woman who made her own decision and chose to give her heart to whom she wanted to give it. If you are a female and you said something negative about this girl following her heart mind or whatever it is motivated her to conclude that uBaba was the one for her then shame on you. Shame on you for not realizing that as a woman you don’t need anyone’s permission to make your decisions. As long as you allow someone else to think for you as an adult then you will be oppressed. Never forget that.
“Nobuhle come on!”
Naledi said shifting in her seat. Nobuhle had touched a nerve. I knew for a fact that Naledi would be judged more than Londiwe because she was born and raised in Jhb and all those fake Jhb with their artificial standards will have a say in it.
“I am sorry I know I spoke out of turn and I am your friend. What’s going to happen when other people bring this up?”
She asked her friend.
“I will deal with that bridge when we get there but for now I am happy and I don’t see that stopping anytime soon!”
Naledi said defending us. She put her hand into mine and I think Nobuhle was stuck now.
“I honestly don’t know what to say. Londiwe is my friend as well so please if you don’t mind I really would like to know what’s going on before I congratulate you both. What if you are lying to me and please I am not saying you are I am just saying…”
“Ok I am babbling now. I have to go guys. We are neighbors we will see each other!”
She said and just like that she left and under as soon as she left her meal arrived.
“You guys had not eaten yet?”
I asked Naledi.
“Nope! I guess that means you are going to have to eat her food as lunch was on me!”
She said. That was not a nice feeling it just felt odd.
*Are you ok though?”
I asked her.
“Yes I am why?”
She asked me. I know when a person looks down and right now she was not herself.
“This thing that happened I am very sorry. I know your friends are not always going to understand this and it will be awkward at times!”
I told her.
“But do they have to be so rude. She just stood up and left like that as though it was us that disgusted her!”
She said. I did not what to say to her. I get it though. Have you ever told born against that you are not a Christian or think that the bible is overrated? That look they give you of contempt is exactly how Nobuhle had reacted. She had tried to put her mind at ease by asking but clearly her brain could not comprehend.
“Its ok love put her at the back of your mind. She is the least of our problems. We should be more worried about your father because if we are out of this tender we won’t get paid but if something goes wrong with the tender we too, myself especially will be held account as I am the one who drafted all the specs. That can’t happen!”
I told her.
“You are the one that said I must not call him and give him a piece of my mid! With that man you fight fire with fire! Tomorrow we call everyone in and we have the meeting. We want you to head this because its intellect that got us this thing!”
She said reassuring me. In all honesty the rich people are at the top not because of their intellect but because of their connections. The same people get tenders all the time because they are connected. It’s not about intellects never fool yourself there.
“I know and I will. This food is nasty by the way! Why do you guys do this to yourselves?”
I found myself complaining. It was some kind of steak but the way she had asked for it to be cooked was not right.
“That’s what she always orders and she is the only one who likes it!”
She told me.
“Oh ok. How do you know Nobuhle by the way?”
I asked her.
“She is actually the friend of a friend. I have a friend who you shall meet of course who stays in Midrand. I go to her often and she happens to know Nobuhle because she too once dated a Nigerian guy so they met in those circles!”
She explained. I wanted to laugh because its true girls who date Nigerian men all look alike, dress alike and more often than not have a little nursery school I call it where they hang out together and play dates are set up for them.
“Eh I see so how come you did not end up with a Nigerian dude! I mean we all hear how much better and how well they take care of women than us!”
I asked her or rather told her.
“Whoa shem that’s a myth. Think of it this way, they come all the way from Nigeria where they are millions of women to come date us here in South Africa and make it seem like a kindness, it’s not!”
She said. I could sense a bit of bitterness in her voice almost as though she…
I encouraged her.
“He is in a foreign country where locals already hate him, do you really think he will beat up a South African and think he will get out alive? Remember even if he cheated and I a South African woman went to the police chances of him winning over me are slim. The bias is there the moment I would walk in. They don’t have a choice but to be nice. When you ask Nigerian women they will tell you that their men are trash as well.”
She rambled on. I think I had touched a nerve somewhere in there because that rant was said with feeling.
“Naledi have you dated a Nigerian man before?”
I asked her. Naledi is light skinned but not a yellow bone in that sense of the word. When she blushes its visible though and without looking up from her food she said,
“No I would never!”
She said but I know when I am being lied to.
I was not going to push. She will tell me her past one day if she wants to but I was building the future I suppose.
“How was the date last night?”
She asked me.
“It was fine hey we had fun. There was just a mishap with my mother which we had to go sort out but that is sorted now!”
I told her.
“I wanted to talk to you about something!”
She said to me.
“We have a house or rather I have a house that my father bought me in Ebony Park. It’s three bedrooms and all and close to the mall!”
“Isn’t Ebony Park Township like?”
I asked her.
“Not really kasi like that but some could see it that way yes! Why? Are you scared of townships?”
She asked me.
“No I was just asking where are you going with this.”
I asked her.
“The last tenant I had just moved out and I was thinking that the three of us can move in there for now, rent out our current places which won’t fit three of us in any case whilst we get to know each other and build this. I don’t want to go through this pregnancy alone, staying in a flat and I am sure Londiwe feels the same way!”
She explained her logic.
“Goodness thanks for the offer…”
I told her skeptically.
“I sense a BUT…”
“Yeah there is a BUT only from the fact that we spend our whole lives trying to leave the township not trying to go back to it!”
I told her and she rolled her eyes.
“Dude get over yourself. There are more people in the townships than in the suburbs. Winnie Mandela died in a kasi didn’t she?”
She said annoyed and raising her voice a little.
“Relax love come on!”
I told her.
“Don’t tell me to relax! My mother lives in a township! I am doing this for us. You think I want to leave my kushy apartment in Sandton to go stay in Ebony Park because I am a humanitarian? I am doing this for all us because right now from where I am sitting it feels like neither of you have a plan!”
She said and honestly she had cut me from beneath my feet at this moment. We really did not have a plan and realistically the two properties on rental alone could catch us about r15k a month which would save up for babies expensive. Imagine 7 months of saving rental money how much would that be when the babies were born.
“That’s harsh Naledi and I did not refuse. I am not one person and neither are you. We have to go sit down with Londiwe and we put it to a vote. We have to make equal decisions that benefit all of us remember!”
I reminded her of our agreement at the last meeting of this farce. What was I doing really?
“Ok then let’s go ask her! Bill!”
She said as the waiter passed us.
“What is the rush all of a sudden?”
I asked her.
“There is no rush hey. I just want things to move we are stuck!”
She said. We drove separately as we headed to the house. Londiwe was at home when we got there and the look on her face had not improved much from earlier when she had come.
Naledi said cheerfully as she entered and hugged Londiwe.
“Hi! You in a good mood!”
Londiwe said rather coldly to her.
“Of course I am. I am with my two favorite people in the world so why would I not be?”
She asked her.
“The two of you are up to something!”
Londiwe said sitting down.
“Naledi has something she wants to talk to you about!”
I told her and Londiwe raised her finger and said,
“No don’t please!”
“Just hear her out!”
I implored her.
“No. You guys have already discussed whatever she wants to say meaning that if you are asking for something I now have to agree with what you two agreed on! How is that fair on me? When someone has breaking news then you call us both together at the same time and you break it! Not like this, I don’t want to hear it!”
She said and put up the TV volume rudely.
Michael Nkululeko Maphoto (fb)
I am truly blessed by your writing fellow. Keep it up man.
I am a 27 year old guy in a two year relationship. I was a profound player bro Mike, I hurt many and I got hurt in the process. I renounced being a player a year or so before I met my lady. When we got together, we were met with resistance from her friends and colleagues because of the reputation i had around. I extensively explained to her the kind of man i was, and the kind of man i plan on being with her. Without shame i am proud to say i try to be that man i promised to be, faithful and honest. Anyway Bro Mike, that was put to test when my two ‘high school’ friends working abroad came home for a two week holiday. They had the money and i had the resources (a car and house). So we did business meetings, clubbing and we had fun. Among the fun was my friends hooking up with these two ladies they had been communicating with, we went to their house after a meeting and unknown to me, they had arranged a lady for me as well. To cut this long story short, we all went to separate rooms and I could hear it’s going down. This fine lady was looking at me expectantly my guy. I had to maneuver myself out of the situation so I made a proposal to her, “I will give you R500 if you do not sleep with me”. The lady was about to bite my head off man, obviously assuming I was trying to put a price on her. That is until she took a step back to properly recap and i could literally see her jaws drop. Anyway bro Mike, as my story is already long, lets fast forward to me getting home and telling my lady how my day was. She did not believe, and still does not believe that i turned down sex just like that and even ‘paid’ to ensure it did not happened. She has become so insecure and she constantly says “a leopard never loses it’s spots”. I understand where she is coming from but it really sucks being accused of something i did not do.
Please advise my guy.