YES 192

Posted on Posted in Young Employed and Single

“Lungi you need to come in and see me today please!”

Nthabiseng said on the phone. What was it now? It was only 9am and already drama. I had no idea what was happening with Ntheteng but the thought of bumping into my sister made me not want to go there anyway.

“Its ok I have all the time on my hands. Name the time and I will be there!”

I told her. I was not looking forward to being alone today in any case and another problem was that Miriam was not returning my calls. I had left her three voice notes already but nothing. I am not sure if she was angry at me for taking her mother’s side in their fight but I had to go see her in any case. I know she was going through a lot so I did not want to push her too far. I had just left when my car phone rang.

“Hey you where are you?”

Mbilahelo’s voice said from the other side.

“I am ok I am on my way to my lawyers!”

I told him and he laughed,

“Yup trust a girl like you to have a lawyer! It’s amazing how much my teachers didn’t teach me growing up because no one ever told me that I needed a lawyer!”

He said jokingly. The irony of is that everyone needs a lawyer we just like to pretend that we will never get in trouble one day.

“Enough laughing at me what’s up?”

I asked him.

“Nothing. I was wondering if you want to do dinner. I am cooking; I don’t really like restaurant food!”

He said.

“I am not sure hey but call me in the evening so I can confirm whether or not I can make it! No promises though!”

I told him and he whistled clapping his hands,

“Brilliant, it’s a date then. I will pick you up 1830!”

He said and before I could even tell him that I had not agreed he had hung up. It was raining so I needed to focus on the road as people become idiots on the road for some reason. She was busy when I got to the office but I was put in an empty office.

“Hey you!”

Said a familiar face but for the life of me I could not remember his name. He was the lawyer that had tried to steal my case from Nthabiseng so from there I remembered at least.

“How are you?”

He asked me.

“I am well thank and you?”

He responded. I wanted to be alone but he sat down in front of me and started talking like we were friends.

“I am thinking of going on holiday but I am not sure where to go. I have not stopped to catch a breathe and now I think I am burring out. Are there any good places you can recommend within the country because if I leave the country I think I will die of anxiety wondering what’s happening here?”

He said. I knew this kind of a guy, it was those men that put their work first before relationships and most women hate that. We want him home with us to cuddle and of the guys I personally knew who were like him they always got cheated on because they were ‘never available’. Other women also support those girls because of that as it sucks to eat dinner alone everyone. Turn the situation around and if it was me working all the time and not coming home, if my boyfriend or husband complained there will be quotes flying around saying men are threatened by strong women who are going places so they should just step aside!

“You can’t think of taking a holiday and work there too! When you go on holding you need peace and tranquillity. Think of it that way!”

I told him.

“I wish. I always feel like if I put my work down someone will mess it up! I am tired though!”

Yup such men don’t delegate well either and if you touch their work it becomes a big deal.

“I understand…”

I did not finish my sentence because in entered Nthabiseng.

“I see you made friends!”

She said teasingly as I stood up.

“Yup new friends are always the best!”

He said and he laughed as he walked out. I followed Nthabiseng to her office and she was already chirping away telling me how she was hating the rain.

“Tell that to people in Cape Town.”

I teased and she laughed.

“Cape Town has nothing to do with rain but white people damning every tributary there into dams on their farms! Where are the main dams going to get water from if the tributaries meant to feed into them are already trapped on Van Wyks farms?”

She asked me.

“I don’t know I missed that Carte Blanche episode!”

I told and we both laughed.

“It was not on that show but anyway enough about that tell me about you. Are you ok since last time we spoke?”

She asked me concerned. I really had become that irritating friend who always had problems when I visited. That was not a nice thing at all and I think if it was me I would avoid such friends.

“I am fine. I think if I could I would just hide under a rock and let everything pass me by you know!”

I told her.

“I understand hey sometimes I feel like that too. It’s just that too much happening in life I suppose!”

She told me.

“What’s happening with you? I know when you have something to tell me so spill it!”

I asked her.

“Well there is something but am not sure when it will happen. I have decided to open my own law firm!”

She said and quickly put her finger on her lips,

“It’s a secret and apart from my partner you are the only person I have told this!”

She said.

“Can I scream in silence?”

I asked and screamed in silence too and gave her a big hug.

“This is big news I am so proud of you. Are you not worried about the risk?”

I asked her.

“Of course I am now I have to fend for myself and pay my own bills but its Girls Who Run this Mutha…”

She said singing that last part out in a law voice so as not be heard.

“Is your partner someone I know or its also top secret?”

I asked him.

“You don’t know him but he is from Cape Town and wants to move here. He has mining clients lined up so I think we hit the ground running!”

She told me.

“Oh nice does he have a name and is he married! I need a husband!”

I said teasingly and she laughed because she knew I was joking,

“I don’t care about his marital situation I just want a good business partner. His name is Mxolisi and yeah that’s that. We still working on time lines but I hope it’s soon. I am drowning here!”

She said and I hugged her again offering my congratulations.

“So what’s going on with you?”

She asked me.

“My news is not as big as yours unfortunately but if one person should know it’s you, I have decided to accept my Sangoma calling. I have gone through too much to keep ignoring it!”

There was a pause as she did not know what to say and in all honest had I been in her shoes I would not have known either.

“Lungi are you sure this is what you want? I mean our world is not like that world.”

She asked me cautiously and she stood up and sat next to me on the chair reserved for clients.

“I think I have been running away from this for too long. My life needs balance and I feel that in the last couple of months I have been stumbling from disaster to disaster?”

I explained to her.

“Are you sure there is no other explanation as to why things have been happening like that?”

She asked me.

“No I don’t think. Ever since the dream started honestly I never had bad luck. Since they started so many thing have happened even losing my mother in the process!”

I reminded her.

“Eish your mom, it still makes me sad when I think of how sudden she was and with that said I really hope you are not doing this because of grief. Grief can cloud your judgement!”

She told me.

“I know you mean well but right now I need my friend t support me, nothing more”

I told her. We have friends that love us, that’s true but even they should realize that even when we are making bad decisions, sometimes let us be.

“I am always in your corner you know that so if you have to go do your thing the do you thing.”

She told me and hugged. She stood up and said,

“But that’s not what I called you here for!”

She said.

“Yup I kind of figured you didn’t miss me!”

I told her sarcastically.

“I did miss you but this is serious. I told you that they were intending to close your accounts or suspend them. Well the order came for that came to use today. It was a notice of intention. I am sorry!”

She said to me.

“I don’t get it though I did not do anything wrong. Why must I be punished for something I did not do?”

I asked her.

“Unfortunately unless the law clears you it means you are a suspect like everyone else. The story is bigger than you think. We dug a little further and realized that your company, your ex company is owned by a subsidiary of Steinhoff, do you know what that means?”

She asked me. I won’t lie the names familiar and I had heard it recently but I could not remember why.

“Lungi come on, you are a 702 Black this is something you should know at the back of your head!”

She reprimanded me. Yup I remember back in university we used to say when we start working we will start listening to intellectual middle class radio meaning 702.

“You know I only listened in the car on my way to work meaning now my access to information is less than before!”

I felt embarrassed actually because I always tell myself that I should never be an ignorant person yet here I was oblivious of what was going on in the country.

“Ok the long and short of it Steinhoff makes Nkandla look like a kid stealing marbles at crèche. Billions were lost and yah your company seems to be one of those under the investigation. I can tell you now this is really bad and everyone is under investigation.”

She explained.

“Wait but if Steinhoff is so big why is it not big in the news like Nkandla! Aren’t this people making this story bigger than what it actually is?”

I asked her as I was clearly in the dark about a lot of things. With Nkandla there was not a person in the country who did not know its details yet with this one which she was saying was significantly bigger even I did not know.

“That’s not the point Lungi. A storm is coming your way and you need to brace yourself.”

She warned me.

“But I did nothing!”

I told her.

“I know you did nothing but there could even be jail time if this thing goes the whole mile!”

I looked at her to see if she was joking but the look on her face told it all.

“You mean I could go to jail?”

I asked her.

She nodded.

“Yes!”

***********The End************

@diaryofazulugal
Mikeatdiary
Michael Nkululeko Maphoto (fb)
Mike@diaryofazulugirl.co.za

Dear Mike

Happy 2018 guys and blessings to you Brother Mike.

I am a 33 year old woman from Potch. I was married in the church and I have two kids with a husband who provides and is caring enough. I have a happy family but I am unhappy. For a long time I have known I am different and I think I went to hide in the church to cover this up. A year ago I was put in charge of the youth in class and there was a young lady that caught my eye. She like me was running away from the fact that we both like women. Brother Mike I know the world has changed but I grew up preaching against such things knowing deep down I was being a hypocrite. This girl is 19 and when she came part of her confession was that she feared becoming a lesbian. Our church does not accept such so I was tasked with showing her the light but now I am in love with her. I think of her constantly, I invite her to our house and take her out. She sees me as a big sister and we are very close. I am so in love with her my husband has started to disgust me; I don’t want him touching me. At church as I sit in front she often catches me staring at her and its only a matter of time before I break. I am in trouble and I need help but I don’t know how.

Please advise me.

Potch

14 thoughts on “YES 192

  1. interesting how the book is coming up, so i see you brought Mxolisi. Nicely done Mike, getting interesting but have a feeling this is coming to an end shortly with the intro of Mxolisi. Could i be wrong ?

  2. So good to have you back bra Mike. I hope Lungi accepting her calling means a change of events for her. Im so stressed for her.

  3. Umxolisi! I like the evolution. Thank you bhut’Mike. Potch, you need to come into yourself and be present in who you are. Your freedom and happiness comes into accepting and embracing who you are. If you do not, you will always be unhappy and something will always be missing. Firstly you need to research and seek deeper what it means to be homosexual in 2018 and all the spheres it encompasses, what it means to be homosexual in church, in marriage, in parenthood and in society. You need to learn about the LGBTIQAA+ and gender etc. All this before you decide to come out to your family (I don’t believe in coming out because you never really came into anything, It’s who you are) but you you have a family and this will break it apart, but how you rebuild it is what matters. As people we fear what we don’t know and hide from who we really are for everyone else. That doesn’t serve us, it doesn’t make us heros for our children, it doesn’t make us considerate, it sure as he’ll does not make us strong. It ultimately breaks us and it makes incapable of sharing our utmost best because we’re always wearing a mask. Your faith, question it, seek deeper into what I being spiritual, what is true enlightenment and what purpose God has for you. I have seen in most hard coming out stories, one’s faith either breaks them or builds them on this journey you have to take. I honestly feel the 19year old is there to make you come into yourself. Do not pursue her, she’s a lesson, take the lesson, do the work on yourself and start unbecoming to become the you you know in your heart I hearts you are. Or live the lie you’ve been living. But find contentment in it, otherwise, are you really living?

    1. I have nothing beyond this to say. Im a advocate for ppl living their truths and you’ve just simplified things. Thanks.

  4. @Potch
    You acted on your emotions and if the tables were turned and you were a guy we would be calling you a pedophile.

    Your taking advantage of this young girl.

    You choose to get married and have the kids
    Why must she be used as your coming out ticket?

    There is nothing wrong with being a lesbian but your about to use her.

    Deal with.Your current situation and let the child be.

  5. Thanks Mike. I remember Lungi was warned not to accept the money by her aunt, now the money is coming with a lot of baggage. I wish Lungi can remember her aunt’s warning.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *