I often see abantu bomnyama on twitter comment on white people posts were they say that unless a white person lives one day
in the life of a black person they must not even comment on why we want land etc. It’s a plausible argument. I also see the disdain they have given the West over what happened in Barcelona and their response compared to what happened in Sierra Leone. These are all true cases of what racism and looking down on other races does. One white life seemingly is more important than a thousand black lives. Before you get angry at these racists out there take a moment, pose then breathe out because is it now how we behave in South Africa where one South African life is way more important than say a Zimbabwean or a Nigerian in South Africa’s life! How are you different from those racists in America who after 300 years cannot fathom that a black man is an intellectual equal to a white man? I could not even look at my neighbour at that moment as we waited for an ambulance for the woman he loved. He was so sad if I could hug him I would have but she was mourning in pain. This thing is there but most of us pretend it does not exist because they get to just retweet on it. Xenophobia is real and even I take it for granted.
“Its ok big guy help is coming. Nobuhle will be fine don’t worry. I am going to go wait outside for the ambulance so that I can guide them in!”
I told him. I did not want to be in this apartment right now first with the guilt of what had just happened and secondly with the death stares I was getting right now from Londiwe. She was still pissed at me and the fact that a woman was dying at her fit was not enough to stop her from being angry. I also had another plan. I called Rethabile my female colleague the one who had a tumultuous relationship with Kudzai my boss.
She said to me. I know she always slept late because she was always up to date with series and TV.
“How are you?”
I asked her.
“I am good. I see you are back to health when are you going back to work?”
She asked me. Goodness work really defined my existence and even her asking that was enough to drain me.
“Soon but that’s not why I am calling! I need your help…”
I said leaving my voice trailing there at the end.
“Sure my guy anything you need what’s up?”
I asked her.
“Ok so this is the thing. I kind of called my wife with another woman’s name during sex and she is totally pissed off!”
I explained to her and she burst out laughing. I did not bother to lie because the ambulance should be here anytime soon so better get this out of the way before Londiwe came out.
“Its not funny but listen, the ladies name I called out is named Naledi and at some point my wife will ask to call Naledi. I need you to step in and be Naledi.”
I asked her pleadingly. She laughed.
“Ok it’s cool but what am I supposed to say?”
She asked me.
“If she asks who you are and how we know each other you will just say that we are working on a project together and that’s it!”
I told her. She was listening attentively I am sure even though she was laughing as I said it. She could not afford to get this wrong for me though because I was in enough of a mess as is.
“Ok then but stop cheating on her you know it’s not cool man!”
She told me.
“I am not cheating I promise you it literally was…”
I did not finish the line because I heard a door shut in the back ground. I immediately put my phone in the pocket. When I saw it was my neighbour I took it out to change my colleagues name to Naledi and Naledi’s name to my colleagues.
“Where is the ambulance?”
He asked me and as he spoke the flashing lights of the ambulance lit up the night sky. I immediately went to draw them in as he went back in I think to ready her. They stabilized her and left in the ambulance with Londiwe in the ambulance her after she insisted. I followed behind in the car which was a good thing for me as I was still trying to clean up the mess. I now had to clear the call log in case Londiwe checked on how often I and Naledi called each other. I called Tumi.
“Dude what time is it you woke me up?”
He complained as he picked up the phone.
“Dude I need your advice. I made a mistake and called Londiwe’s name during sex and now she is pissed off at me!”
I told my friend. He found it funny just like my colleague had.
“Listen here, everyone makes mistakes and men are meant to make mistakes. You can’t always be perfect because one day when real problems come in your marriage how do you think you will fix them with all your perfectness!”
I really do not come from the school of thought that says men are allowed to make mistakes when women are not but seeing the corner I was in right now that was the best advice ever.
“Yeah fine so how do I fix this?”
I asked him.
“I always do grand gestures. I am in her face every second until she either snaps again and we fight it out or she starts talk to me. Don’t give her a chance to breathe in fact. If that fail start the argument on how she does not trust you and give her a taste of her own medicine!”
He told me and we laughed. I know that there who are always quick to point out that men are trash but the truth is for every trash man there is a woman or are women willing to help him be trash to another woman.
“Just make sure you have a woman who can step in when you need her to be Naledi!”
Yup that was his advice. All men know that the best way to trick another woman is going through another woman. Women who say men are trash have at some point helped other men to get one over their girl it’s just that this time it’s happening to them. It’s easy to get angry and judge when it happens to you but when guys cheating on girls come to you to ask for you to back them up more often than not you do. It’s very rare for a women to betray a male friend who is cheating on another female and in the very same breathe very common for that same woman to report on another female that’s cheating. She can even judge her best friend for cheating.
“Why does it sound like you driving?”
He asked me.
“I am going to the hospital with my neighbour! Eish Naledi is coming back to haunt me!”
I confessed and he laughed.
“Dude I said I wanted her and you said I must stay professional yet you are going for her yourself!”
He accused me.
“It’s not like that. I don’t want her at all. I just don’t know how she managed to cross my mind and at that time. I am a one woman man yet lately things just seem to be falling apart!”
I explained to him. The one thing all guys know, when you need advice never ask your player friend so it was time to hang up which I did.
“I see you took your time where you on the phone with her?”
She asked me when I got to her.
“I was driving behind you. I obviously can’t speed after an ambulance come on now!”
I said to her. She was still unhappy. I had remembered to take her an extra jacket so I offered it to her but she refused.
“Love you causing a scene it’s not what you thinking at all!”
I told her.
“And what am I thinking?”
That’s a loaded question which you can never have the answer for and I knew if I answered things will only get worse.
“I proposed to you because I only have eyes for you and that’s why I fight for you all the time. Don’t bring nonsense home because of insecurities. I did not say what you say I said but here is my phone. Go through it and when you are satisfied you will find me in the car!”
I told her and I walked off. I was hoping my bluff would work. I left the phone on her lap and walked outside to the car. It really was a mistake what I done but some mistakes you can’t own up to because the consequences are usually worse than the crime. I had not sat in the car ten minutes before she came after me.
“Your mother called. She says that she wants me to come over tomorrow to discuss my job.”
She told me standing outside the car window.
“Aint you going to come into the car its cold outside?”
I asked her but she ignored me and folded her arms.
“I said your mother called about the job!”
She said again. Ok I guess that’s what she wanted to talk about so let’s talk about it then.
“Oh ok that’s good right?”
I asked cheerfully trying to lighten the mood.
“I am not a charity case Vusi! I don’t need your money or your pity! I am a strong woman so you can keep your job!”
She said and I won’t lie this took me by surprise.
“Londiwe you have been looking for a job for a long time and now that it’s here you throw it away?”
I asked her very surprised.
“Yes I did but I realized you want to own me and treat me like shit at the same time! I can’t stand for that!”
“So you bite off your own nose to spite your face?”
I asked her.
“I think my dignity is way more important. I am going to my sister’s house! There is my Uber!”
She said and with that she just left. She really was angry and I absolutely did not know what to say to her no matter how much I wanted to stay.
I had fucked up royally!
Michael Nkululeko Maphoto
How are you and the readers? Hope you are good!
I am 23 and graduated university last year. I was dating someone in the same degree program with me. We graduated together and I got a job but he did not. He passed better than me but most of the companies where we interviewed they took females and not males. The problem is our relationship has become awkward. He is very unhappy and I feel like he is acting unfair towards me. He is always angry and sometimes it feels like he is jealous that I am working and he is not. We dated from first year and I love this guy dearly. He is also starting to feel threatened whenever I go out with my friends as I can afford myself and although I ask for permission from him it’s just odd now. The permission thing is something we used to do in varsity where if he wanted to go out he will consult me and vice versa. The last time I asked him he snapped at me saying that I can do whatever I want because ever since I started working I do so anyway. It’s not true. We fight a lot now. I really don’t want to lose him because he really is an amazing boyfriend.
How do I reassure him?