I always wondered if there was Uber there time I met Vusi would I have met him. Would I have gotten into his car when he offered to take me home or would I have insisted on getting an Uber or Taxify? Imagine I met him because he gave me a lift and I had no answer. These new things really kill our sense of adventure. They have made life easier for women I won’t lie, nowadays we don’t have to depend on men for transport. They have however killed off our ambition to get cars. Remember how people tell you that if you rent you are paying off someone’s rent, with these services if you use them are you not helping pay off someone else’s instalment. It’s just a thought. There is always a catch. I called my sister back as I had been thinking of how this would work best.
“Ok I am coming now! I hope you didn’t give her alcohol you know that her sugar is not stable!”
I shouted at my sister. You know that disease we call “sugar” as black people? Well it’s actually diabetes but most include high blood pressure in there too. Well my mum had that.
“Why do you always think I am irresponsible though? You always make it sound like you are perfect. Just come pick her up please!”
I heard some commotion in the background and then she hung up. I had not said I was not going. In fact I was already on my way there. I took Taxify to my sister’s place. Vusi always made sure no matter where ever I was I should never get stranded. So I was quite mobile for someone who was a driver (a bad one). When I got there because of the concern I had for my mum I practically walked though everyone without even looking up into their faces. If you make eye contact you are forced to greet.
“Where is she?”
I asked Nonjabulo. She was sitting by the door, outside.
“Why are you not with her?”
I asked again. She was tipsy at best and she just smiled and said,
“Oh you finally arrived, have a drink! I think I am drunk!”
She said trying to stand up and she fell into her seat.
“I thought you said mum was sick! That’s not funny!”
I shouted at her but she actually found it funny.
“Nonjabulo you can’t play with mum’s health like that. It’s not funny and it’s irresponsible!”
I shouted at her.
“I was just trying to save your ass. I wanted you to come so I thought you would be with Vusi and how was he going to say no if you said mum was sick!”
She said innocently. The problem with my sister was that she was generally an honest person and she actually meant what she said. She meant well.
“I know you are angry at me but well I need to get your back here by any means necessary. Did Vusi refuse to come back? Why is he being so uptight like this mara?”
She asked me. I explained to her that he had not refused to come back rather that his mother had called for him.
“It must be nice being so well acquainted! Imagine people can just call you to give you tenders!”
She said sarcastically.
“Nonjabulo, you even know what that word means?”
I asked her and we both laughed. She not one for big words unless she mocking a politician. The other reason I forgave her so quick was that I was relieved that mum was fine. Having a sick person in the house is not easy and its hard work.
“Of course I do. Anyway it’s his loss; the party is so much fun!”
She said. There were probably three times more people than the ones I had left. There was booze everywhere.
“I see your people came through!”
I complemented her. My sister was one those people that can draw a crowd. Maybe it was her personality or the fact that her clothes were always too small, a lot of men followed her around.
“They did. Mum is leaving though she says it’s too young for her. She is with Linda right now!”
She told me. I left my sister and went to find my mother.
“Oh you back, is Vusi outside?”
Linda asked me as soon as I entered.
“Nope. He didn’t come! He was called away to a meeting.”
I told them.
“He works too hard that one. I hope when he gets home he has enough food waiting for him!”
My mother said with a serious tone of concern in her voice.
“Of course mum but that’s not what the world is about anymore. He calls ahead if he wants food and you know him, he loves take out too much!”
I told her.
“If a man loves take out it’s because his wife can’t cook. That’s the polite way of telling you that you need to improve yourself! Why else did he pay Lobola if you can’t even feed him right?”
Look where this was going now. Come on now.
“Aunty but nowadays no one cooks!”
Linda intervened on my side.
“Keep telling yourself that. You are a generation of glorified prostitutes that hide behind McDonalds and KFC. No wonder why the men cheat so much! There really is no reason why to come home at night if you can’t even feed him after he worked all day and so hard for you!”
Yah Neh. I had not expected that. My mother could suck out the air in an empty room when she spoke like this.
“Aunty come on, let’s go outside isn’t you said that you wanted to leave!”
Linda said standing her up. She did not hesitate. Something had pissed her off and I know what it was. When Vusi had been there she wanted to discuss some business thing but well, she never got the chance because we left.
“Your husband is working and wena you are too busy getting drunk with your useless sister. When will the two of you grow up! You hit the jackpot but you still act like Khanyi Mbau before she bleached her skin!”
She said. My mother like my sister shocked me there. She knew the word bleach? Really?
I said without bothering to stand up. It was rude I know but I was annoyed. Why was I being shouted at though? It was not my idea to leave but his! There was an unopened bottle of Savannah Dry on the table, I think it was Linda’s, I opened it and literally drank half the bottle at one go. I was annoyed.
“Don’t mind her!”
Linda said when she got back in. She could see I was hurt I guess. Was she right though, my mum that is? She had made me feel bad that whilst he was busy working I was here partying. This was worse if you consider that we had fought about it.
“Let’s have some shots!”
Linda suddenly said. Shots at a braai? Young people live a weird life! I agreed though. Dumb move.
Ten minutes later Nonjabulo came through the door and said,
“Londiwe there is someone who wants to see you outside!”
See me? At her party? Maybe it was Vusi he had finally come back to his senses.
“Who is it?”
I asked her.
“It’s a surprise come out!”
She said sounding excited. I did not want to remain seated in case and you know what curiosity does to person.
“Ok cool it better be good. Linda do you know who it is?”
I asked my cousin as she stood there but simply nodded her negative response and shrugged her shoulders. I followed my sister outside and there was her surprise. I must say it was a huge surprise indeed.
I cursed out loud! It was Simon. He was the ex boyfriend before Vusi, the one who used to beat me up and drink too much. He was the same ex boyfriend who had led me into Vusi’s arms so how on earth, like seriously how was this even a good thing.
“What do you want?”
I asked him angrily. My blood went from zero to boiling in seconds. I hated this man with everything I had.
“Nonjabulo how could you think this was nice in any way? How is this a surprise that you could be proud of?”
I asked her angrily. She had just disrespected me so much.
“Londiwe I am sorry. I messed up on you. I want you back. Please just hear me out. I am born again now!”
The fool, Simon, said before Nonjabulo could say anything. Fuck these so called born agains. You see why I have a problem with this. So if a man rapes me and many other women after he gets born again when he gets to heaven must he now be allowed to sit next to me and all is forgiven? Huh! Kanjani? If the man who murdered you child or your husband gets born again must you forgive him because some pastor put water on him and told him that he was born again must you forgive him? Is that it?
“You guys are making noise come on! Come talk inside?”
My sister said as people were starting to turn to look. I turned around to face her, giving Simon my back in the process as she had come up from behind me.
“Nonjabulo, how is this a surprise to you! Are you stupid or what? I have a husband who you know and you say you love! Are you mad?”
I accused her angrily.
“Well Simon paid for most of these things so I could not say he could not come!”
“So wait, when my husband refused to pay you went to get my ex boyfriend, the one who used to beat me up to a pulp to come pay! How could you do that?”
I cried. My sister was so selfish and insensitive. She only thought about herself.
“Londiwe wait, it’s not like that I…”
He said touching me on the shoulder. I turned around so quickly to say,
“Don’t touch me!”
But before the words even came out somehow I tripped and I fell right into his arms both of us falling backwards with the momentum. Here was the problem, I fell on top of him and as soon as we hit the ground (me lying on top) someone said,
“Londiwe what are you doing?”
It was Vusi’s voice!
It is not what it looked like and what it looked like was me on top of my ex, my skirt hiked up, in public and my husband having caught us!
Michael Nkululeko Maphoto (fb)
You have a gift sir and I hope you realize this and make use of it to greater effect.
Thank you for reading my letter. A year ago I cheated on my boyfriend of three years. I was not settled mentally and I thought I wanted other things in my life. When he found out I broke up with him and told him that I was moving on with the other guy. Within a month of that the other guy I was now seeing broke up with me. I was humbled by his actions but I moved on. The boyfriend I had broken up with did not give up on me though. He kept trying to get me back but my friends kept telling me that he just wants to hurt me and so on. I felt guilty though for what I had done to him. He had treated me so well and I had thrown that back into his face. After I broke up with my 80\20 I did not date again. A week before Easter I met my first boyfriend at a party. I was drunk and he took me to his place. He slept in the spare bedroom. The following morning he took care of my hangover etc. We slept together and now I feel so dirty. I feel like I am using him for something but I don’t know what. I do not deserve him I know but he seems so happy when with me.
What must I do?
Must I go back to him and carry the guilt around for the rest of my life? Or must I cut all ties and risk never finding someone to love me just as much. I really messed up and I take responsibility.