Why was my life this complicated though? Why could I not be like other girls who can attract a boyfriend with no
drama, no baggage and no stories? I often listen to girls whine about how their boyfriends are bad to them with envy because the things they complain about are so basic. You complain that your boyfriend does not call you often enough in a day, really? I mean he already calls you but because you are never satisfied with what you have you want more and wanting more leads to see the man you are with as inadequate. Good or bad, you are never happy because there will always be more out there so what you have will never be enough. Now here I was sitting next to Mbuso and he was not much but where would my pride be if wanted to be with him. He is a nice guy yes but the only reason he was where he was if I am honesty was because his wife or girlfriend, I have never actually asked, died and life insurance money ended him in the suburbs. I know a lot of men who when the money runs out become angry and bitter. Women will tell you that whatever you do never end up with a broke man because when things go south, which they often do, they are mean and resentful. I am not justifying that remark but there is truth to it.
“Lungi, you still there?”
He asked me.
“What do you mean?”
I asked him.
“I blacked out for a moment there, got lost in my thoughts. I am worried about my mum!”
I lied to him. I was not ready to tell the truth I guess. Eish the truth is an overrated thing when it can cost you something.
“Yes I know. I feel for you. Your sister is intense though, she scares me!”
He said and whistled then we burst out laughing.
“Yes you are right but she was not always like this. She is actually pretty cool but she is angry at me a lot lately!”
I confessed to him.
“Well speak to the husband so that he can fix things between the two of you! It’s not right if you are sisters!”
He advised me.
“He is the problem. I beat him up for cheating on her so she is angry because of that!”
I told him.
“What kind of a man gets beaten up by a woman though?”
He asked me laughing but he said it in Zulu.
“Where are you from Mbuso?”
I asked him.
“I am from PMB originally but moved to Jhb when I was 17. My uncle asked me to move in with him so ever since that I have lived here.”
He explained to me. The reason why I had asked him that was because of the way he had mentioned how men can never be beaten up by a woman.
“So you are saying if you and I had a fight you will hit me back?”
I asked him curiously.
“Firstly I am not violent but truth be told I will allow you to slap me once or twice but to beat me up, like I am a child, no never! I don’t advocate beating up women ever but I can’t stand there and be abused. This abuse thing can be a two way thing you know!”
It was a very diplomatic answer that he gave with fair points but somehow it was not what I wanted to hear. The problem with Zulu men is that they want to be Indoda without being indoda in actions! That was the reason why I was reluctant to date Mbuso. I know you can’t paint all men with one brush but I had dated before about 4 or 5 Zulu guys and it all ended with this power struggle in the house. One didn’t even pay the bills I was paying and he still made himself the man of the relationship. Zulu men don’t believe in a couple being best friends. I kid you not. Nhlakanipho, one of the guys I dated used to say that there are things that he can share with his guy best friend but not share with me. I told him, if he can share his dick with that best friend then yes I understand but if not then ok voetsek hamba! The nerve, sies, men can make you so angry! That’s where my mistrust for Zulu guys came from, such nonsense! Nhlakanipho, lol, that guy was something else! If ever I can sing that Adele song “Hello” he is the guy I would like to call. He had a big ambitious ego with no follow through! That’s like having a man with a big dick yet he can’t get you an orgasm.
“We are here now!”
He said when we got to Bara. I think my mind had been so preoccupied I had not even seen that we there.
“Let me call my sister!”
I told Mbuso but her phone just rang.
“She is not picking up, maybe something has happened.”
I told him panicking.
“No nothing has happened. Don’t think like that! You must always be positive. If you are negative then things also turn bad!”
He advised me. With my sister not picking up we decided to go look for them on our own. We went straight to the ward we had left them yesterday. We found a nurse there.
“Good afternoon nurse, there was a patient here last night, Mrs. Mbatha, where has she been moved to?”
I asked the woman politely. Before she could answer another nurse appeared,
“You look for the lady with the very rude daughter?”
She asked me. I could sense anger in her voice when she said that.
“Rude? I am not sure I follow maam?”
I asked politely.
“Yes, you look alike. Your sister came here in the morning and demanded that her mother be released. She said that the nurses and doctors here cannot be trusted and that we kill people for fun. Some of the nurses wanted to beat her up even so if I were you I would not ask too many question. She was moved I don’t know where because everyone refused to help her. Your mother was conscious by the way and we were waiting for x-rays and to do a cat scan when she was taken.”
The lady explained. Eish my sister also. She just reminded me of high school. There used to be this thing called ‘after school is after school’ and once someone said that to you in front of people it meant you have been booked for a fight with someone else. My sister liked fighting back then so if she got into a fight, which she would win, that persons sister would often come to me and tell me ‘after school is after school’. I am reminded of it because now here I was blindsided trying to explain her behaviour.
“I am sorry about my sister. It must be the stress because she is not often like this. Can I apologize to the other nurses please, eish I am so embarrassed?”
I asked her.
“No its fine, we are done with her, please never bring your mother here again because we will just look at her like you sister suggested!”
She said walking away. Is there anyone with more attitude than nurses though ah? Anyway that damage was done. Mbuso and I walked to the car and eish we could not help, we both burst out laughing.
“Is this the same sister you are saying you beat up her husband, she sounds pretty scary to me?”
He asked me and he was right. My sister used to have this fighting spirit and now I could not help but wonder what had really happened to her that she was now being treated like that by her husband.
“Beats me, I am just as much in shock as you are!”
I told him. It was then my phone rang and guess what, my sister!
“I see you are out of jail, record time!”
She said cheekily.
“Yes I am and I know you think I am lying but I am not. I will take you to my house so I can show you the warrant they had. Where are you and how is mum?”
I asked her.
“I am by that Netcare next to your house and you would not believe who her doctor is, some lady who knows you and Mbuso!”
She said casually. Of all the doctors in the world, of all the hospitals she had to choose mine and Esihle as the doctor. Like come on now! Didn’t I have enough problems right now?
“Ok then we have just left Bara where you almost got us beaten up. What did you say to those nurses mara because they were more than just angry?”
I told her and she scoffed at them,
“Useless things those ones! They had not even given mama breakfast when I got there and it was at 9 imagine! I was so annoyed. I wish I knew how to sue them because I would mxim!”
She said without a care for our safety whatsoever.
“Ok I will be there now now!”
I told her as we drove there.
“So where are we going?”
Mbuso asked me. His fuel was a bit low so he drove into a garage on the side of the road. The attendant came out and he said,
“Eh jita, kopa r150!”
When he took out his wallet it looked as though he was counting his last money. It’s not that I was looking for faults but I was sitting next to him and I saw it.
“Everything is expensive nowadays hey and I hear there will be an increase again soon!”
He said casually. Why did he have to talk about money though especially after what I had just seen?
“Yeah you are right.”
“So where are we going?”
He asked me. I told him Netcare and I saw his expression change when he recognized which one it is. From where we were it was not really far.
“Guess who her doctor is, of all people, your girlfriend!”
I told him sarcastically.
“She is not my girlfriend!”
He said defensively but unconvincingly. What was up with this guy? When we got to the parking lot he turned to me and sad,
“Let me go home and check on Ntheteng. They could be back so I must make sure. Call me when you are done!”
And with that he drove off like he had blue lights. He practically ran away and stood and watched him go.
Liars most of them!
Michael Nkululeko Maphoto
Please we need more letters. This was the last one i could find in my mail. Kindly email to the above email address
Impressive job you doing, I have been following your since Zulu girl.
I am a 30 year old lady in a relationship with a 40 year old successful businessman ,whom I love with all of my heart.
We stay 300kms away from each but for the 3 years that we have dated we see each other every weekend with no fail.
Each and every holiday he comes back home so visiting where he works has never been a priority for me. He supports me financially ( bought me a house and a car ) so everything was rosey until I was woken up by a very disturbing phone call this one time.
This lady called to tell me that they have been in a relationship for years and they are practically staying together. She sent me pictures of herself driving his car and a picture of them together (well half of his face was visible, you know how we take insta pics)
Even with all this evidence Mike he denies everything. He denies even knowing the girl, my sixth sense tells me it’s true.
I don’t know if I have been dogged too much in past relationship’s that I just know that people are capable of doing such things maybe I could be wrong.
What’s worse though is the fact that I feel if he came clean I would’ve been hurt yes, I would’ve screamed at him, cried and we would’ve found a way forward.
But now I’m more disturbed by the fact that he lied and I keep wondering ukuthi if he can lie when there’s so much evidence in front of him, what else is he lying about.
I do not trust him , I am so heartbroken and I can’t tell him all this cause to him ( I’m allowing liars to come between us)
I’m starting to see this person in a very disturbing way.
I don’t know what to do , should I disregard all the evidence and believe my fiancé
Or should I trust my instincts and this woman I don’t know and end this relationship.
I am not a happy lady ,Im always angry at him for lying more than im angry about the cheating ..
I don’t even know what to do