Your friend should never ever call your father cute to your face. It’s wrong and disrespectful in so many ways. Yes,
it might come across as a compliment but in a world of blessers and thirsty girls it also plants ideas and sows seeds of mistrust between you and her. It’s a very important boundary to place. When you grow up, you allow friends into spaces that others can’t even get close to. One of those spaces is access to your family. Ideally they should see her as a daughter too but the world of today is that she could end up sleeping with your father or him pursuing her. You can’t trust anyone and is not almost always true that the people that hurt us the most are the ones we know and put above others!
“I am just kidding Lungi, geez calm down! He is too old for me. You know i am not like you!”
She said. That was rather a low blow. She meant that I was into old men whereas she was into younger guys.
“Really Khanyi? So I am into a type now! Why is it when I bring home the money you don’t care where it came from as long as you get your cut?”
I snapped back angrily. She was always the one to ask what he gave me. It’s something that started from the very first date I went with him. She had been so excited she even helped me dress up. When I got back I had given her some of the money I got.
“Calm down friend I was joking ok! Loosen up; the meds are making you hear things!”
She said raising her hands trying to make what she said sound different.
“Well pick your jokes because the only reason why you going to Dubai is because of me and those old people you are dissing! In fact its time you got yourself a sugar daddy so that you stop judging so much! Let’s see how your gag reflexes will handle giving a blow job to a 45 year old man when you are only 20!”
I said angrily and so annoyed. She saw that too. I was calling her out. I think I had grown past those friends who urge you to do something meanwhile they are sitting at home waiting for you to fail.
“Friend, Palesa, I am sorry. I spoke out of term. I didn’t realize my words are going to hurt you!”
“Well they did and I am not kidding. I am going to ask Sam to hook you up!”
I said defiantly. I was actually joking, would never wish that on her. She looked uncertain and just looked down. I had gotten to her. With many people having other people live so called worst experiences is fine as long as it’s not them.
“I don’t know why you are saying that?”
“No moving on. Are you ready for Dubai? Have you decided what to pack? What to wear? What you going to buy? Are you still so excited?”
I asked her. I just confused her immensely. She did not know what to say to me.
“I guess so. Can we just talk about school and other things relative?”
“I don’t know what relative means but sure we can talk about anything you want!”
I told her. It was hitting home I think that to be part of my party she could no longer be a cheerleader only and seat on the fence but get in the game too. Don’t they say true friends if you get into jail, they will be sitting in the cell next to you.
“Uhm, so… Did they say when you are coming out?”
She asked me I guess the only question that could make logical sense to her. I told her what they had told me which was not much. I changed the topic for her and asked her if she had apologized to Yolanda.
“Hell no. I don’t like that bitch you know that! I haven’t called her. She tried calling me but I am really not interested so one step at a time please!”
She said putting up her irritated voice but today was in a bad mood as I was not going to nurse her.
“Do you have any idea what you guys put her through at that funeral? Is that what makes you better people? The poor woman loves your father and you can get angry all you want but he loves her too! It’s not your place to tell him whom he should love so stop being so cruel and selfish and give them a chance at happiness!”
I told her. She did not say anything but I knew from the look on her face I had hit home. I think I had hit home once too often today though because she left immediately after. She did not even say buy. It felt good telling her the truth for once not pampering her ego. I fell asleep. I guess I was more tired than I thought.
The nurse said as she entered my room in the morning.
“You should be going home today so you must be exited. You must wake up and bath!”
“The doctor will see you shortly!”
I took a shower and it felt like the greatest thing ever. When I was done the doctor had already started rounds and eventually he came to my room. He checked me over and gave me the name of a psychologist. There was actually no medication that came with it. I was good to go at ten. My mother is the one who picked me.
“Your sister wanted to come but she had an exam today. You will see her later in the evening though.”
She told me.
“What do you mean in the evening? Am I not going to my place?”
I asked her already annoyed at her.
“I know you don’t want to go with me but you have no choice. Universities are on strike again. I am tired of it! It’s like you people don’t want to graduate! Every month a new strike!”
My mother said. How could this woman be so out of touch with reality though?
“Mum the strikes are necessary. University fees are too high. If I was not sick I would have been there with the other students. This is our time and we can’t hope for someone else to fight this fight for us!”
I told her. I had been part of the first fees must fall protests so I knew exactly what we went through.
“But why burn universities though? Why burn the one thing you are fighting for? Tomorrow are you not going to wake up and burn something new when you fight for the fact that there are not enough books in the library?”
She asked me. She got me there.
“Its not all students who are burning but mum you know that if we don’t protest nothing will change. One day when I have kids I want my child to know that we fought for this and won.”
I told her. She did not listen to me anymore and instead changed the subject.
“Your father has invited us for dinner tonight. More like he is asking to cook dinner for you at my house!”
She said sounding annoyed at the very thought. In her head it must have looked as though he was looking to get back with her.
“I think that’s a nice thing as long as the two of you don’t end up fighting. Its the fighting that kills anything we try. If you fight today I am leaving!”
I told her.
“I am not the one who starts hem though, he does! He thinks we are children and well, we are not!”
My mother and father were awesome as individuals but the moment you put them in the same room that was when you saw their true colours. I really was not interested in their brand of drama.
“Don’t worry we won’t fight. We having this dinner for you so the last thing we want is to stress you any further.”
When I got home I went to my room and slept. MY mother said she was going to Wonderpark to but some things for the dinner. She had used that excuse so many time growing up to go see her boyfriends I half believed. When I woke up there was someone in the house. It was Boitumelo. I went to her room.
I said to her smiling.
“Why didn’t you wake me up?”
I said walking into her room.
“You want the truth. When I found you sleeping I thought you had done it again. I had to check your pulse even until I figured you were sleeping!”
She said coldly and with a bit of annoyance in her voice.
“Are you serious?”
I asked her.
“Of course I am serious. You tried to kill yourself now every time I see I will have to make sure that you are fine. How could you do that though? How could you? I have nothing to say to you!”
She said and walked right past me.
“Boitumelo why would you say that?”
I asked her.
“That’s easy; you love yourself more than you love us. What you did is unforgivable. I am so ashamed to call you my sister!”
She said and with that she banged her door. This is why she had not come to the hospital. I had to fix this somehow.
I called Neo. His phone rang and rang until someone picked up.
“Unknown Number hello?”
A female voice said on the other side. Did she just refer me as unknown and why the hell was she answering his phone.
“Can I speak to Neo please?”
I asked confused now.
“Neo is in the shower may I say who is calling when he gets out!”
Neo was in the shower?
“Tell him his girlfriend called and he better have a good reason why my number is unknown!”
I told her and dropped the phone.
Michael Nkululeko Maphoto (fb)
Thank you for reading my letter.
I am have married to my husband for six years now. He has always been childish and stupid, puts having fun first before us. We have two kids and I work so does he. The first time he cheated I forgave him. He begged for the forgiveness and I gave it. He then cheated again and this time I beat him up. No joke I beat him up. He thought he could fight back but once I hit him in the balls he never got up. I took a belt and I thoroughly gave him a hiding. That was the first time. The next time he said he was going out with his friends and guess what, he came back four days later. He had not been picking my calls. I was worried sick for him! He lied and said his boys wanted to do a road trip and they tricked him into it. I beat him up again, this time fists only. He thinks I am stupid. I told him to leave and go back where he was but he begged me to stay. I told him that those friends are not his friends anymore and banned him from going out and alcohol. We have peace in the house now but I feel guilty because one I am an abusive wife and two, he looks so sad. On weekends you can see he is desperate to go out but won’t dare ask me. I also can’t encourage him to do so because he takes advantage, what do I do to balance this out?