Apologies for the late post. Tomorrow it might also be late but we working on it. Thank You
Taking a taxi for me was not something I was scared of! I am not one of those girls who once they have a boyfriend see it as the ultimate insult to take one! As women we really have moments when we cheapen ourselves! What we would
do to be in someone else car is beyond reason? How many of you have taken pictures in a high end car just for you to look cool? It’s not yours, its someone else’s, it will never be yours because your ambitions don’t go towards owning one but towards riding someone who owns one, it will never advance who you are but you act as though you are the greatest piece of shit to have ever graced the planet because you are in one. Nope, I will gladly take a taxi any day if the world is down to such basics. Having a blesser does not make you stupid, I was not stupid, I could take a taxi!
Two hours later I was home and as I opened the kitchen door my sister was finishing eating. She was so surprised to see me there she literally opened her mouth agape.
“Ok tell me why you are doing this to my face?”
I asked her! She was so surprised to see me and for a moment she did not know what to say!
“Did you come back home just for me?”
She asked? I think she could tell by the look on my face that I was not here to play. I was angry at her. She could not keep on making threats at me! I was her bigger sister and much as she did not agree with my decisions they were mind to make not here’s. I was so annoyed at her at this stage.
“Of course I did! All you ever do is threatened me and that’s not cool! I am here now and whether you tell mom or not that’s on you but fuck it I am tired!”
I told her!
“So you telling me you left your boyfriend took a taxi, a train, another taxi, and another taxi just to come home so you can come home and fight me!”
She said! I know what she was doing! She was trying to make me look stupid and guess what, it was working! That was my sister for you! She was so smart she used logic to defeat you in an argument which is why she never got reprimanded!
“Yes I did and I am here now!”
I told her.
“Good on you! Now what?”
She asked me?
I asked her.
“Now … Stop it!”
She laughed! She laughed in my face. My sister, two years younger than me laughed in my face, straight at me. She laughed at me. How could she laugh at me? That on its own was enough to add on to the anger I already had so I was now angry X 2! See why my math’s was never good!
“I hate what you are doing! You are my sister so I will protect you if you making stupid decisions!”
She told me.
“Well I don’t need your help!”
I screamed at her.
“Unfortunately for you, you do! God says help those who can’t help themselves!”
She reminded me!
“You don’t even go to church dude stop copying the freaking bible ok!”
I screamed at her. I don’t know why again that affected me because I was not much of a church goer either.
“Let’s see what mum says then since she is the one you want to report to. Once you have told her and she exacts her revenge I will have the yoke of her threats off my shoulders!”
I told her. That’s how you fight a battle. Take the biggest obstacle out of the way but putting it on the table. I could see she was ready for that because she started whistling. I wanted to hit her but she is my sister and we last fought when we were younger and I think at this stage I was beyond violence.
“You are here because you are feeling guilty!”
She said to me.
“No I am here because I don’t want you messing with my life!”
I corrected her.
“It’s my life too. If something happens to you what happens to mom and me! You are so selfish. All you see are your immediate needs forgetting that we all have needs too! I need my sister to guide me because what you do influences me!”
She said to me and I scoffed at her with a cheeky laugh.
“Really now! You are far too kind but you are smarter than mum and me combined so neither of us can influence you to do what you don’t want to do! Let me enjoy my life and you enjoy your books.”
I told her. As I said this, my mother walked in.
“What are you doing here?”
She asked me. Before I answered her next words were,
“I don’t have more money to give you!”
And we laughed as she hugged me. She was not joking though. This was her way of saying I must not to ask her.
“NO. I came to see her so we could finish her applications!”
I told my mum. My sister interjected immediately.
“I told you I don’t need help. I have applied to many scholarships for what I want to study and I know I will get at least one of them. You can’t apply for me what I don’t want to do!”
She said in what was a bit of a speech. As long as she did not mention Dubai I was fine. My next issue was getting her to back off Neo and that was not going to be easy now that mum was here. How do I dissuade her from what she wanted to do to us?
“We need to talk about what happened and what you think you saw!”
My mother said to my sister but she stomped off immediately to her room. Something had happened then. My sister loved my mom probably more than me. She might not have treated her as the smartest person but she respected her. She would never just stomp of like this.
“Let me go talk to her!”
I said to my mum leaving her standing there. She was not going to follow her.
“No please don’t, it’s between me and her!”
My mum said but I was already walking away. When I got into my sisters room she was already sitting in front of her laptop as it switched on.
“Can we please reach a compromise?”
I begged her.
“Why are you whispering?”
She asked me like I was playing games with her.
“What do you mean?”
She asked me.
“I am serious; anything that has to be said through whispers clearly shows that you have a lot to hide!”
She said. Why was this child so fucken annoying? She was speaking like she was coming out of a Chinese karate movie.
“Oh come on dude. Please I will do anything you want me to do please!”
I pleaded with her.
“All I want you to do is pass, get a degree with an honors at the very least because nowadays a degree without an honors is like AKA without a Twitter rant! It’s simply irrelevant!”
She said. If I had managed to make up that line I swear I would have heard a smirk of satisfaction on my face but because she was my just super smart sister to her it was just another ordinary line in her plethora of many. I really had to quote this one because it was funny.
“I will pass I promise! Look on Instagram, even the girls with blesser lives are graduating. It’s like they are giving away degrees for free out there!”
I said trying to sound smart and aware.
“For you it really is about Instagram neh?”
She said shaking her head in pity like the whole South Africa when Minister Maite Nkoana said she didn’t know what Brexit was in figurative speech but the media and of course black twitter deliberately made it sound the way they wanted it to sound so as to humiliate her! True to form very few people bothered to listen to the full future or to understand what she meant.
“No its not. The reason why you have all these bad images of it is because of what you see on social media. Come on please give me a break. I know I can’t argue with you and win. You always win!”
I asked her this time starting to stroke her ego. Smart people in all their ego love being reminded just how smart they are. They want it such that they are always right but before you give them that make them compromise.
“Ok cool then, I have a proposition for you…”
“And what’s that proposition?”
Had we turned a corner?
“My only condition is for you to pass but to do this I have to see your grades after every test.”
I don’t think I have ever sank so low but I immediately said,
“What do I get in return?”
“You get me not telling mum or Neo that their daughter and girlfriend is sleeping with old men to get on a plane how is that?”
Ouch! That hit a nerve but I calmed myself done! If I argued further she might put the offer the table. It was a humiliating offer, not even my mother asked me such things growing because well, she was always ‘busy’ but my dad yes. He used to help us with homework and if we got it wrong would pull our ears until they started burning!
“Ok cool but please don’t make me sound so cheap! It’s not like that!”
I agreed to these terms.
“It is exactly like that and only you refuse to see that you are being cheap and naïve!”
She said. Like hell I was going to show her my results and she did not know when I was writing. I started to walk out and she said,
“Where are you going?”
She asked me.
“Well we done right?”
I asked her.
“No we not! Open your student portal I want a copy of your timetable!”
She said. Was she fucken kidding me? It’s like she was reading my mind at each panicked thought I had.
“Ah come on, isn’t this pushing it now!”
I asked her. She looked at me like I had said a foreign language.
“It’s not. Do as I say! In fact, I want your student number and password this way I will be able to check randomly how well you are doing!”
She said. It’s amazing how belittling me she was right now by simply wanting me to do better at school. If she had not had this thing over me I would have said over my dead body. I wrote it down for her. She immediately went to her laptop to see if it worked! It did.
“How do I check timetables and results?”
She asked. This was like those moments where you mother asks you to go take a belt so she can hit you with it! Ah! I showed her were to click!
“This is what I meant, you are highest mark is 55 and yes you might not having anything below 50 but come on sis, you know you are doing way beneath you!”
She said actually shocked that someone who had 50 can call that a pass. She was disgusted!
“I am not failing!”
I told her defiantly because as far as I am concerned, 50 percent in university is a pass and 51 percent is an achievement.
“Get over yourself before I change my mind. From now onwards, if you get any mark below 55 I swear to you the deal is over. There is no negotiation!”
She said and I snapped and screamed,
“Come on its only Dubai not an entrance into heaven!”
Angrily and so annoyed at her.
“What’s this about Dubai and why are you screaming in my house? I am tired tu!”
She asked folding her arms across her chest.
Michael Nkululeko Maphoto (fb)
I am a 17 year old boy and I have a problem. I am in grade 11, have good grades, play sport at school and come from a decent earning family. My problem is I can’t stop masturbating. When I go to school I find myself looking for the girls in short uniforms which are probably 70 percent of the school of which half of them sit with their legs open. It’s so hard not to look and most teachers don’t care about length of uniform so they just get shorter and shorter. I have never passed an inappropriate comment or touched these girls inappropriately but I feel like my constant fantasizing about them makes me just as bad a pervert like people who molest women. I recently got a girlfriend and what’s worse I don’t even like her but I needed someone to scratch the itch. She is in grade 11 as well and was already experienced. I lost my virginity to her but she now can’t keep up with me and I am back to masturbating in-between sexual encounters with her. How do I stop myself from this dirty mind that I have because it really is affecting me and writing like this means I am desperate? I can’t tell my parents because they will laugh and I have a brother who is gay so he won’t help much either. I need solutions though please if anyone can advise especially on how to stop masturbating I would be grateful.