Y.E.S 23

Posted on Posted in Young Employed and Single

“No female easily want to start over with a new guy. Telling secrets, giving her body away again, falling all over again. Too much!” @claudette_dvovo


Beyonce’s Formation video, who has watched that? There is a scene when all the girls walk in formation and are marching up? That is how we walked, Rudzani and I that is towards Susanna and him! Remember back in primary school when you marched up to go beat us someone, hands folded across your chest possibly to make you look bigger and look angrier, that was us minus the hands. I was very disappointed in Rudzani because a lot of times women do something, they let men or in this case a white lady takes the credit. This was not about race but about business. You don’t get promoted on good intentions or just working hard. You get promoted, respected and recognized by being innovative and trying new things that others can see. He was our client! When we approached they all looked towards our direction and I am sure Susanna was wondering what the hell we were up to. This could go one of two ways, one we could end up fighting for a client in front of a client which was extremely uncomfortable and unprofessional or two, like in this case he would do the right thing and choose us but either way we could both get fired!

“Ah there she is, Miss Mbatha right, I looked for you earlier what happened?”

He said with a big smile on his face. Why was he not acknowledging Rudzani though?

“Yes sir good morning. You know Jhb traffic, just when you think you have figured it out, it throws something brand new at to you!”

I said trying to crack a joke everyone understood. Jhb can build as many roads as it wants but the simple truth is that there simply too many cars and not enough space to add roads. It’s a nightmare which most at least once a weak must live through. I do it every day and every day I pray for a good day and also that I don’t end up a statistic.

“Yes I know what you mean. Rudzani killed it yesterday. I was trying to explain to your colleagues here that in my company we work with point of contact which is you and Rudzani! You sold us the concept we will would like to, with your permission of course Ms Susanna, retain you in the negotiations.”

He said smiling his eyes lingering way too long on Rudzani which made it very clearly that this dude liked her. Now here is the conundrum, because he was white, charming and in a suit, why were we not treating him like a sexual harassment lawsuit waiting to happen as would have happened were it a black man standing there? It was clear he liked her. It’s a pity her skin pigment would not allow her to blush visibly but I think we could all sense the radiance of that internal blush as she was practically sweating.

“Yes sir of course! All our employees are well trained and capable of pushing the company forward. They just cannot sign for obvious reasons but I will leave them to you!”

She said turning towards us. I could see behind those gritted teeth she was seething! I doubted though that there would be consequences as yes, she was my boss but we brought the deal right!

“Nicolene, come let’s go talk to the guys at BSLR and see what more trees we can shake!”

She said casually accepting defeat. Nicolene, the little traitor did not want to go with her clearly by the way she dragged her feet behind her as she followed her. Out of earshot Rudzani finally found her voice again and said,

“Was that thing of initial point of contact true though because if not that was brilliant!”

She said.

“It was not hey!”

He said and when she smiled I knew dude knew that he had just scored points.

“But I did not like the way they let you sit there by yourself when you were the one who introduced. That was wrong. No one puts Rudzi in a corner!”

He said! Hold up, did he just…did he just quote Dirty Dancing’s cheesiest line? What on earth is with men and pick up lines? Your wit and charm should be enough to carry you through in a conversation with a girl not this tarot card sayings.

“I love Dirty Dancing! I can’t dance for shit but I love it!”

Rudzani said. Thank heavens the joke had not gone past her head.

“Me too, and I can teach you to dance if you want!”

He said immediately. Ok now I was getting awkward again. Now they were romancing each other in front of me.

“Eh guys let’s keep the focus! We are being watched I am sure you can see!”

I told them. They knew who I was talking about and they actually laughed. Was my colleague starting to warm up to this guy? I would love to be a fly on the wall if she ever brings home to Thohoyandou for a meet the parents session! That should be priceless.

“Yes I can see meaning we need to get this business of yours sir otherwise we are so fired!”

She said to him.

“We are going to have to wait for my business partner also boss to arrive because I briefed him last night and he is keen to see what this is about!”

He said which made me smile even more! A company that has more than one decision makers is a company that is often grounded and has direction. A company like unfortunately most of these tenderpreneur companies that has one decision maker more often than not does not do well.

“That’s fine! Should I leave the table and give you guy’s space?”

I asked him and he laughed.

“No please stay. If you leave your boss will come back!”

He said. That was the last time he spoke to me as now he focused his conversation on Rudzani. My phone rang which was a relief. I did not want to be holding the candle so I excused myself. It was Sfiso! Sigh!


I said to him. I stood up and walked towards Susanna.

“How are you?”

He asked me. He sounded a bit cautious as he said that. Did he think I was going to start crying again?

“Am good thanks, just give me a second!”

I said covering my mouth. I tapped Susanna on the shoulder and said,

“We are waiting for his business partner and you guys can join us. There is no need for us to be all over the room when we are trying to sign one deal!”

I told her! I had put her in her place but I also had to play the right cards and not make her go into full war mode on me. It’s never good to work like that with colleagues.

“Ok cool, just call when he is here!”

She said with a smile. Nicolene rolled her eyes, she was not impressed clearly but I was not here to nurse the little Barbie’s ego!

“Sorry about that, where were we?”

I asked him.

“We were not very far hey, we had stopped at hello!”

He said.

“Are you at the airport yet?”

I asked him.

“Yes. I have already done everything now just sitting in the incredibly expensive departure lounge. I swear at times I think South Africa tries to make sure you don’t come back the way they over charge you!”

He said and we laughed. He was right too. I went to the movies the other day and they made me pay r26.50 for a medium coke! What kind of crazy fuckery is that and what’s worse it’s not even the real coke but that acidless machine one? I know that things are expensive but I tweeted Sterkinekor to tell them that was bullshit!

“Yes I know what you mean. When am I coming to England?”

I asked him. It just came out hey and I immediately felt very trashy for asking that. You know when you have someone you really gel with, words simply just come out!

“Uhm well…”

He said!

“Sorry I take that back! I don’t know why I even asked!”

I said immediately.

“No, it’s a fair question but I thought you said you were not interested in a relationship because once we cross that barrier it stops being a one night stand as you called it but an affair!”

He explained. Eish, did he really have to explain it like that. Now I had called myself a one night stand. I know men love those but as a woman, even those sexually empowered, and it just feels a bit trashy.

“It’s ok I honestly did not mean it like that! It was a joke that well that sounded more serious than it was supposed to be!”

I explained again. I know he had asked me a question. Did I want to be his side chick? Nope! I did not want but at the same time, did I want to lose him, nope!

“How long is your flight?”

I asked changing the subject!

“Give or take 9 hours especially since I heard there will be rain on the route!”

Talk about changing the subject. We were now discussing the weather as opposed to affairs and what not just to avoid talking us.

“Are you going to tell your wife what happened?”

I asked him. It was a dumb question but I know a lot of women say that they prefer honesty to being lied to but the only truth in that statement is that they are lying to themselves.

“No I am not! Should I?”

He answered me I think sarcastically.

“No, probably not. She should never know because it’s unfair to hurt someone and telling them will be hurting them deliberately which I don’t support.”

I said. Why was I asking stupid questions though? This thing called guilt is real though. I think I made him uncomfortable because he then went on to say,

“My flight is boarding shortly. Let me just prepare myself and will tell you when I land ok!”

He said.

“Have a safe flight!”

I told him but something told me that would be the last time we will talk. It was just about the way he said that, I can’t place it. I stood there contemplating whether to call him back or not.

“Lungile, the partner is here!”

Rudzani said to me tapping me on the shoulder to catch my attention as I was so far away.

“Ok cool!”

“Are you ok, you look a bit unhappy?”

She asked me.

“No am fine! Let’s do this!”

I said recomposing myself. I noticed that Susanna and Nicolene where already on the table with them meaning I was last again to show up. There would be no caught in traffic excuse again this time.

His business partner was black and facing the other way. No wonder why he had been comfortable dealing with Rudzani and I.

“Finally we all together!”

I said as I strode forward making the business partner stand up and turn.

God has a sense of humour I tell you! He is an absolute comedian!

“I am Lungile Mbatha!”

I introduced myself but trust me I was not in a humorous mood right now because I was completely and utterly humbled!

*And I am Simba Tizora!”

He said.

It was the guy who had called me xenophobic at the wedding!

*******The End*******

Dear Mike

Thank you for this platform a million times. Kindly please post this letter under Y.E.S😊

Ok about 6 months ago my girlfriends and I (engineers mid 20s) joked about dating only doctors, lawyers or engineers (so typical I know). I then happened to attend a party of a family friend who happens to be a doctor, where his fellow doctor mates were in presence, to cut a long story short…I wasn’t really impressed by their arrogance (medical doctor brothers). Fast toward two months after that I went out for simple chillaz on a Friday night with my friend, her bf and the bf’s friend( late 20’s), and guess what both my friend’s bf and his friend are attorneys(how ironic). So I and this other attorney guy hit it off really nicely. He thought I was smart and I thought he was really funny and smart, he then asked for my number so we started talking… he asked to take me out on a date and so maar yeah we started talking every single day. Brother literally led me to believe he was into me, very caring and randomly likes to tell a girl sweet somethings and we would literally have deep conversations without realizing it. To cut a long story short again, he took me out. We hung out a couple of weekends; he even came pick me up at work sometimes just to see me nje after work. I got excited when he started calling and introducing me to his friends as his lady (thought it was really sweet but soon). So mike basically in a period of about two months I met his boss, some of his colleagues and his brother (speed Sa paraffin I know), I started liking him, not because he’s a lawyer but him as a person (he wasn’t even that hot so but I liked him for him) .Now about two weeks ago he came to my office again after work.. He had said he wanted to congratulate me in person after I had copped yet another belt (graduated post grad).we chilled at my office until he took me home later. The following day I never heard from him…phooooof gone, no phone call, no WhatsApp (he’s not dead coz he changed his DP a couple of times), no nothing. Tried getting hold of him but eventually gave up. Now I want to know from your readers. What the hell? What’s a girl supposed to do now? Do I forget about him?


28 thoughts on “Y.E.S 23

  1. Congratulations on your achievement Pauletta. But yeah, I think it’s best to forget about him. This is what they call “ghosting”. And honestly if he wanted to keep in contact he would. Change DPs for who and then leave my text on one tick? No thank you! Before you start creeping around everywhere to find proof of his existance just forget about him. I know your degree won’t keep you warm at night but you’re worth way more than someone who just disappears on you at times. Many fish in the sea, just wait for the right ship to come in. Also, these guys nowadays like introducing you to everyone just to give you a sense of security so don’t dwell on that. Especially that line of “my wife”. Take care and Keep well.

  2. Pauletta, girl he just saw you as a challenge and after getting what he wanted didn’t see the need of sticking around. I say you must just loose his number and move on with your life. Someone better will come, they always do.

  3. Thank you mike.

    Pauletta its either he found someone else to entertain h8m or someone from the past has come back and now he has forgotten about you. All I could say is that forget about him because whoever is in his life now and they leave he will come back to you. He will keep doing that. Congratulations on your achievement. Maybe his keeping his distance because he feels intimidated by you and that you won’t be depending on him.

  4. I am yet to understand why you told us who you and your friends wanna date.
    If you go looking for people of certain qualifications don’t come asking us what’s wrong with you when the guys you want also prefer certain women.
    I’m a doctor but you don’t see me making stupid pacts about dating astronauts

    1. Everyone has personaL preference. Be it height, race, type of job Etc. So why is her preference such a “stupid pact”? Does that make her prreference invalid because you don’t share the same sentiments? Men have been putting women in boxes for the longest time, why not let the women liberate herself?

      1. Thank you Thando…thats just it..we know even soccer players has got types..they prefare instagram models or tv personalities mostly..reality.So i dont get why this Kamo person fails to understand that yet he claims to be a “doctor”.

  5. Q&A sorry about what you went through , delete his numbers forget about him and move on , I know it’s not easy I have been through something similar to yours .

  6. Thanks Mikeesto, awesome start to the week 🙂

    Eintlek Pauletta, did you give it up or not? I’ve been reading and reading trying to find a piece about ya’ll doing the do and it being bad or good…. dololo! The story sounds like these dangerous random love “situationships” that are on the rise. If not dealt with carefully they can disappear as quick as they started I tell you.

    I still wanna know though, did ya’ll do the do? coz if he left after getting some then the answer is clear, if he left before he got some then its crystal.


      1. Therein lies the root problem P, You didn’t give it up. On the one hand I commend you for actually holding up on giving it, on the other it could just have sealed your infant relations with this oke. Whether or not usinde entweni, that is the question we shall forever ask ourselves. One thing for sure though, I would’ve never stuck around past the first month, this guy managed more than two months, that’s something incredible. Move on sisi, you are very brave 🙂

    1. Crystal clear😂. Nami i also wanna know if they did the do. Im sure pauletta made the things that it cannot make the do to be done

  7. Ms P…. Just one question, when you say he took you home, do you mean you guys did the ‘do’? Girl if you didn’t do the do then say a thank you prayer and forget about him! Still even if you have done the did with him count you loses and move on. Thing is you will never understand how men think nje and trying to understand them will be a waste of time but when a man wants to be with you be guaranteed that he will show it to you and you will know. Lona who decided to keep quiet and act dead then sister girl let him be, LET HIM BE DEAD! As you grow older you will realise that literally you do “kiss a lot of frogs before meeting your prince” just ensure you condomise all the way as you busy kissing those frogs.

    And Oh! Do pray about your life partner, do tell God what you want. Be specific in your prayer that you want a Doctor/Lawyer but it should not just end there pray about his character as well because you will meet all these professionals you want and they treat you like shit!

    1. Guys they did it there was a lot visits and free time together we know what happens most of the time the guy only wanted to hit skin, the lady was head over hills about this guy, but anyway this is a lesson learnt about putting your standards to high about people you want to date. You can marry a doctor or lawyer but at the end of the day you will end up paying for the bills in your house, let life take it’s course.

  8. weeee I know his kind shem. he will rock up with some sorry excuses. don’t fall for any of that shit boo. he is not worthy of you and your time.

    Thank you Mike.
    I love this story hey:)

  9. Pauletta the same thing happened to me and I kept on trying with no luck. It was clear that I was being ignored, so its the same for you love. Move on and forget about him,its his loss not yours , you deserve waayy better.

  10. Nice twist buthiMike, more like a gost from the recent past. Soooo fresh! I lyk
    I love the so called “modern women standards” but some women fail to understand that the higher U go the harder the fall too. So if U set yo standards of a potential man too high & box him (just as men used to box potential woman) the higher also the risk of failure.
    Reflect, while selecting carefully, don’t put too many limits for yoself as love can be found in the least expected places.
    First investgate that he is alive & kicking then put yo lesson in yo bag & march on with yo head high.

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