Realities – Chapter 84

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I am all for beating up a man because he should have known better. I was going to have my foot so up his ass, my knee juice would quench his thirst when we got away from the scene I had created. Had he fucken lost mind. I might be a so-called ungrateful wife but rule number one of cheating, no matter whose conscience or morality curve you pray to, DO NOT GET CAUGHT and ladies, I had not gotten caught. Until the day he has proof and evidence of me cheating with George I will maintain this right up to judgement day! But first and this is important, I had caught him in the act with the hefer! My blood was boiling even now that I had dealt with her! It felt good and I wanted more of her blood! A lot of women are of the belief, “why hit the woman, go after him first” what what? A woman who knows he is a married man does not deserve that kind of respect! Hell no! A bitch is a bitch and I aint taking that back. There are times when being politically correct really does not matter, for a persons actions define them for what they truly are. You can’t always be the woman whom other woman seem to take things away from. How many boyfriends along the way have you lost to other girls simply because you could not fight for him out of either pride or weakness? How many boyfriends have you shared with other girls simply because they were selfish enough to know that there wasn’t a damn thing you could do about it? If you fall under this category then you have a serious problem you need to fix now because the future looks bleak for you my girl. One day when you think you are happily married another bitch will step in and boot you out. Your own kids will be calling her mommy for crying out loud because you lack a backbone to defend your own. You cant lose your man to another woman. What’s wrong with you? Are you blind, deaf and dumb to not be able to see and hear what’s going on in front of you? Do you lack the foresight to prevent yourself from being the victim yet again? I want you to listen to me, no matter how prissy, classy or hot you think you are, if you don’t fight for your man you will be a mistress in your own relationship. Yeah the feminists all get their panties in a bunch when they hear that men will be men but guess what, its reality. You can voice your opinion all you want on that phrase but if you are so high and mighty and fail to acknowledge it, it will hit you like a sledge hammer when you least expect it. And because your pride gets in the way of your vision you will not even bother to bitch-slap that home wrecker. Yeah I can hear you saying that you will never sink that low but guess what princess, she is replacing you because you think you are above that.

A lot of South African girls fear xhosa girls because they know those girls will beat the crap out of you if you mess with their man. There is no negotiating with that shit and if you find yourself always being the one who gets to walk away because they are cheating on you then it is not him with the problem it is you. What, you think God singled you out in a population of six billion to be the one to be toyed with? (Sorry sweetheart you aint that special). Grow a backbone and bitch-slap the hefer because she deserves it. On another day I would probably say walk away and maintain your dignity but fuck it, some of these bitches need to learn. You cant spend so much time building a relationship only for a so called friend to come and take it from you. Nah sweetheart you need to go ghetto on her and beat the living daylights out of her skanky black ass. She needs to learn that you might look like a delicate flower but when it comes to what’s yours you will fight like a lioness. And if you have energy beat his ass up too. Stupid fuck must keep his dick in check and she should lock her pussy in a vault if she must because she must stay away from your man. There are those girls that gossip for the sake of gossip and almost always cause havoc between your man and you. They constantly say bad things which either make you angry at him or vice versa. Half the time they are lying too. Take off your earrings, take off your heels and put on sneakers, budget for a new weave and manicure for its time to teach that bitch a lesson she will never forget.

Phew, I needed that. I needed to vent. I got in my car and drove out! I looked in my rear view and there he was driving behind me. I think he thought I was going to his mothers house because when I did not turn on the off ramp he flashed his light but I ignored. He tried to call me but I ignored. The road led to Jhb. Only after the tollgate did I stop.

“I can’t leave without saying bye!”, he said running to my car window.

“Sizwe if you do not drive home right now the things I will do!” I warned him angrily.

“But come on Nothabo, it will be wrong of me to do so!”, he begged but I made it very clear that he keeps driving in the one direction.

“Okay fine then you lead the way.” he said but I laughed and said, “who says I am going with you? I am going to pay my respects to my mother-in-law!” I said.

“Then why am I going home then?” he asked confused!

“Because you are a lying cheating husband. Go home Sizwe. I am going to phone Mapula or Lintle in…” I checked my watch, “…in 4 hours to check if you are in the house yet. If you are not there, when I get there I will burn everything you own and to hell with this marriage!” I said menacingly.

I don’t think he actually believed this was happening and only when I got into my car and made a U-turn did he move. I saw from the rear view that he was staring at the car. I stopped to see if he would do as I said. He put his hands on his head, kicked out angrily then got into his car and drove. He drove to jhb.

I got to my mother-in-laws house but she was sitting with some church ladies. She left them and came to me. She actually whispered, that woman is dramatic. “Have you dealt with that other matter?” she asked me as soon as we were alone.

“Yes ma I dealt with it. I beat her up so badly I doubt very much you will ever see her again!” I told her. I saw her smile. This woman was sadistic.

“She did this to my friend long ago. She was that child we saw grow up from a distance and one day my friend’s husband came and said he had made her pregnant and was going to marry her. Imagine a child like that breaking up a home?”

She told me. I could see she was very much against Nelisa’s mother but I really did not want to dwell too much on this. It was late already so I told her that I still had to drive to Jhb because I didn’t have off tomorrow.

“Ah, it’s not done, you need to go to her house and make sure she never comes back again! A woman like that you don’t tell once. You need to break her at the source!”

My mother-in-law egged me on. Eish, I had not intended to take it that far. Once at the mall was enough, but why go to her home. I told her this.

“Didn’t she come into your home and do the same to you? Why are you such a coward? Another woman walked into your marriage and tried to break that apart and now you are concerned about hers? Really now! Pathetic!”, she said very annoyed at me. She had a point. I had not invited nor gone to this woman’s house at any point to get anything from her. She had started this. This time there will be no one to stop us.

“You must go with Thabo here though because you never know who will be at her house. She thinks because she is pretty she can get away with anything!”

My mother went on angrily. I know a lot of women believe that so called prettier women get away with a lot. It’s why when you walk into a mall and you see one of them usually our first instinct is to dislike the person. There I said it. People always ask why women would hate on a woman they have just seen in a mall an never even spoken to. It’s simple, jealousy. Something makes us hate strangers especially the pretty ones. My mother-in-law was right! There had to be a second round.

“Do you have her address? I want to get it over and done with!” I said. She immediately took out her phone and said, “Someone sent it to me. Read this sms!”

She said. I don’t know how she had managed to get under my skin again but she had and managed to raise my anger levels. This was a stupid idea but angry people do stupid things right.

“Thank you for her address!” I said with a smile! Fuck I wish I had acid, okay fine I am kidding! This does not mean I was not going to go Xhosa on her face! I was going to leave a scar she will never forget!

Thabo drove behind me because he too did not know the way. It was not very far funny enough. No wonder why my husband had wanted to stick around, easy access. When we got to the house it was not too shabby. Lower middle class maybe, that’s how I would describe it. The gate was not locked and they did not look like the kind of black people to have dogs. Nah, that takes a certain type of black person. The lights were on and I could hear the TV. I went straight to the back door and knocked. My heart was beating so fast now. Two minutes a frail looking old man opened the door. Was that her husband? This man was old bathong and by the looks of it actually looked sick! Why would she deserve such a person who was already one foot into the ground? Was he not dying fast enough for her! I even felt sorry for him and actually lost my nerve.

“Dumelang! Sorry I took long, my wife is in the bedroom and I thought she was this side!” he said softly but very respectfully.

“How can I help you?” he asked finally.

“Is your wife in?” Thabang asked before I could stop him. I would have just said wrong house and left at this stage. He called her out to her and said she had a guest. He slowly walked away and I could see he was in pain.

“Ke mang papa!” she asked her husband. I wanted to laugh because that literally how he looked next to her, like her father.

When she saw me she froze, looked at him, then whispered looking at me with pleading eyes, “Please don’t! Please!”

Then scrambled!

******The End******




Michael Nkululeko Maphoto fb




Dear Mike


Thank you so much for reading my letter.


I have been dating my girlfriend for about a year and a half. In June we went to a party. She did not want to go but I really wanted to so she did it for me. When we got to the party we met people she knew so it was not bad. I was with my friends and when the drinks finished (I don’t drink) my mates and I went to buy more alcohol. I was sober. I asked her for permission to go and she said yes. Unfortunately only specific places sell alcohol at night so we took about two hours to come back. As soon as we got back I looked for her. I could not find her. The girls she was with said she got a call and went outside to take it. Only about an hour later did she come back. She was crying and demanded that we go home. I agreed and we left. I begged her to tell me what was going on but she refused. She would not let me touch her, hug her or even console her. She cried a lot as though someone had died. We broke up that same night. I was not sure what had gone down. I begged her to come back etc but she refused. A month later she called me to come see her. I had not moved on because to me she had turned out to be a pyscho. She told me that the night of the party three men had raped her. She had gone to take a call and they jumped her. That’s when the guilt set in, firstly I forced her to the party, secondly I left her alone, thirdly I did not look for her hard enough that night but most importantly, she is HIV positive now. Again that is not the biggest issue, she says she wants us to date again and I am ashamed to say because of her status I am scared. If I date her the truth is I will be doing it out of guilt of the part I played in what happened to her. I am not even sure if I still love her or I just feel sympathy for her.


Am I evil for feeling the way I do? I feel like an ass-wipe and actually think I am.


Thank You







40 thoughts on “Realities – Chapter 84

  1. QnA, Eish this is so bad, I don’t even know what to say. People please if you are raped GO TO THE CLINIC IMMEDIATELY. It might be the last thing on your mind but its really important. The world we live in…

  2. Yho Thabo, ai… askis man… that is deep. I dont know but dating someone because you feel guilty is not wise, and one day you will meet someone you might like more than you feel guilt, what then? If there is a possibility of you looking beyond the health status and your own feelings of guilt and actually falling inlove with the girl again, then i say try it, but if you cant look beyond it then just walk away…

  3. Nelisa’s mother must stand her ground and beat that holier than thou woman to a pulp, it was enough that she beat her up at the mall when she caught her red handed, now she is asking for it. Where is Nelisa when you need her with her pot of boiling water…Mnxm

    Q&A I’m only sorry for your ex- girlfriend and not you, I see you as being selfish man.

  4. Thabo

    Ppl can call me judgmental or what ever they want, but my opinion you will hear , how do you date someone for a year an a half then you say I dnt think i love her anymore what bull is that, brother had it not been for you that girl would not have experienced anything that she had to go throu, then you go an call her a “pyscho” what makes her a pyscho now, before you dated her or even for the 18 months you dated did you not see shes a pyscho

    you do not deserve that girl coz clearly you were only with her when times where good when they are bad you run away. 3 men !!! Took advantage of that girl and when you are meant to be there supporting her you call he a pyscho

    She doesnt need a person like you in her life, its best you end it n stay far away from her, I am literally angered by this post , I cnt belive ppl can be this cruel

    1. Leave your emotions out of this for a while and read the letter with understanding this time…you will realise he said he considered her a psycho for leaving him without any explanation,which means he considered her decision to dump him psychotic because he wasn’t told the reason behind it…as for if it wasn’t for him she wouldn’t have been raped that’s not true,I can turn it around and say if it wasn’t for the call she wouldn’t have been raped but that would be blaming the victim so the real pepatrators in the rape case are the ones who took advantage of her…..

      1. Fine without the pycho , how does ur gf disappear for an hour away on a call n you saw no need to go look for her, a whole hour to the point where she had to come find you…… all in total he last saw hes girl 3 hours ago, n he didnt care to find out how long ago did she leave for the call, what direction did she go, i cant go to the toilet for oonger than 5 mins with my bf coming to look for me, n it was at night who would call her for so long at night huh? there’s no justifying what he did am sorry I will not pity him at all

        1. But Vee…you cant honestly put the blame on Thabo…he did go look for her in his defence…I am pretty sure he never ever anticipated her being in danger whatsoever because of the guilt he feels now.. When I go to parties with my boyfriend and there are people I am comfortable with…He lets me be and he only looks for me when he wants something…because in his mind I am okay and there is nothing to worry about…Thabo is just scared guys, lets not judge him or throw insults…. Now he is willing to be in a relationship with her though he is feeling indifferent.

          Read Tsaluuur’s comment……

  5. Good on you Nothabo. Singaphela omaka Nelisa noNelisa who have PHD’s in home wrecking.

    Thabo….that’s a heartbreaking story. If you love her, her status shouldn’t be a problem. There are people who have partners with HIV, go seek counseling on this but that’s if you willing to overlook her status.

  6. I dont know whether to laugh or be offended at how Xhosa girls are depicted…its like we are these ghetto-rough fight -for-your-man typa women….mmmhhhhh…Anywho…..

    Thabo….Eeeerr my guy, this is quite deep hey. I suggest that you take her to therapy first.She needs to work throught his…and maybe her wanting you guys to date again is her way of not wanting to deal with all of this alone. So suggest therapy…ypu can even go for couple theapy just to work out on how you can both look past this odeal and maybe have a healthy relationship where you dont feel guilty about what happened to her and her not blaming you for it ( not that I’m insunuating that she is )

    HIV is nothing to be scared of hey,…its a manageable desease like any other, it just has a stigma of it being sexually transmitted thats all… Just educate yourself more and talk about it …the more you talk about it the more you will learn to deal with it..thats if you decide to stay in a relationship with her…but for now…I suggest you take her for therapy nhe…

    Wish you all the best bhuti nhe…


    1. Hey Pillz, the Xhosa depiction is starting to annoy me hey… and when you point it out it’s like you being a typical Xhosa. What is so sad is that people especially in the Gauteng region have this hate towards Xhosas that I don’t understand…

      1. Yhooo Enhle…kalok we there thina to “steal” their men and we are infamous gold diggers..I honestly dont know where all this sterms from really….I remember when I stayed in Pretoria….the stories they would tell me bra…Ohhh and apparently thina maXhosa dont want to learn other people’s lamguages when we go to Gauteng…we are expected to know Tswana..I dont know from where but we are stubborn andf arrogant……Its sad really….if only they knew that Xhosa people are the most welcoming most respectful people..the fact that we dont take nonsense from people should not be a picture of us being violent….

    2. Enhle and PillzB, i am a motswana (what you refer to as Tswana in s.a) from Botswana, i schooled in s.a.. the same thing happened to us batswana/tswana… in terms of the perception of us women and the men to some degree. we got -ve infor about all other tribes in s.a, from Xhosas Zulu, Pedi right down to Afrikaans etc. (west Africans as well ). its annoying sometimes… but i guess we all know our people, and given the chance get to interact with others and actually appreciate what they are all about (given the opportunity and taking it up), which most of the times its the opposite of what we hear or what is being depicted by others. and sometimes… there are elements of truth in some individuals. #we just have to keep it moving!!

  7. Thabo.

    I dont usually comment on the letters but today i felt i had to,Thabo you are the lowest of low. You do not even deserve to walk on this earth you are not even worthy of your mothers love. That poor girl is the way she is because of you,,,,why the hell would you go buy more booze when you dont even drink. Does your selfish mind have even the slightest clue what rape does to a woman? Get off your high horse feelings and help her deal with this… spend the rest of your pathetic selfish life helping her get back on her feet. Whether you like it or not its your fault what happened, now you want us to feel something for you or ease your conscious !!!!! ahhhh hellll nooo papa.

    Ha o qeta ore ngwana e mong ke “Psycho” Sies
    Wooooooo Shem wa swabisa.

  8. Guys I think Thabo meant that he saw her as a psycho for breaking up with him for no reason at that time… not that he’s calling her a psycho.

  9. Thabo

    do you know rape?? Rape. get off your high horse and help this lady to get better, being in a relationship with her now will not help because clearly your so called love has vanished, support her, take her to therapy, be there for her. you are selfish man ai.

  10. Thabo my guy..reading your letter made me realise that you are not well informed about HIV,so the 1st thing for you to do is to get yourself informed about HIV..Then talk to your girlfriend about going for therapy or support groups and if you are allowed go with her..As for your love for her,I think you never loved her enough to start with because Love doesn’t just go away due to circumstances and if you do still love her then you just letting fear and ignorance control you..Be there for this woman because you care not because you think you owe it to her or that you in some way feel guilty ka what happened to her…Her being raped is something you wouldn’t have controlled even if you where still at the party,she went out to take a call which means she wanted privacy,yes maybe out of worry you could have gone out to check on her because she took long but one or two of those bastards would have done the deed by don’t blame yourself my nigga just support this woman through this tsa relationship o tla di bona agter..

  11. QnA I have read this letter three times now and shared it with some friends. The girls are angry at Thabo for his honesty and the guys are saying they too would think twice. @Sistaboss we have all been to parties and you are not with your partner 24/7. Thabo asked for permission to go and she agreed. He did not just disappear like most men do. He begged her to go and most guys would back me up here, usually we done even asking our girlfriends to come with (shameful thing to admit) instead we make up a lie. This is a man who wanted to be with her. Thabo got dumped no explanations and yet you are angry at him for being reluctant to jump in. What part did he play in the rape @vee. Did he lure her from the other girls and make those men rape her? His guilt stems from that he was not there to protect her. Now to all of you that said he does not know HIV how many of you would readily date a person who is positive? It’s easy to just speak but be realistic

  12. Yooh mama Nelisa u r such a coward,beat up this woman to a pulp and remind her that u r ziswe’s baby mama too yooh

    1. Haibo she a baby mama so she has no claim whatsoever. Remember Nothabo could rip Sizwe’s life apart. Why all these side chick tendencies encouraging such sh*t. Nothabo should ruin her actually.

      1. LMAO @Side chick tendencies…so its right for Nelisa’s mother to mess around with a married man ( lets now pretend like she is not married herself ) because that is no way for a married woman to behave ina ny case…Why is Nelisa’s mother entitled to Sizwe now…because of the baby?? What is HER husband to say when he hears that his wife is fighting to “claim a stake ” from her baby daddy….A baby the HE raised as his own?????

        Hee hay abantu bayazi thetha izinto, claps quick to fight and not THINKING of the consequences…..#SideChickTendenciesMustFall

      2. yaz Tee nam am looking at all the sidechick tendencies from the commentors abanye bathy “maka Nelisa stand your ground” what ground vele?shes a SIDECHICK for heaven’s sake she has no ground yena she must just take the beating lol

        1. Hayibo i’ts not about side chick tendencies but the first beating was enough and to go over to her house to beat her up now is just asking for it, come what may, I would beat her up properly so that she keeps her man on a leash next time… Anyway, don’t side chick, at least knowingly….

      3. Lmao side chicks irritate yaz…where does a baby get even the smallest liver to beat up the wife…the babymama that just resurfaced futhi

  13. Yho mara some of you can be soooo harsh! My younger sister was raped when we went to a party, with a lot of people around, she met her class mates there and was hanging out with them and us around, 3 of them stepped aside for like 5 minutes and they never came back, we started looking for them but because they are teenagers we just thought they were being naughty nje. An hour later they came back, my sister & her friend bloodied and hurt and the young boy that was with them robbed, he was forced to watch these scums raping the 2 girls on top of that. Do you guys know what that does to a person? Me as the big sister I have to live with that for the rest of my life. I have failed her in so many ways and that never goes away. Imagine the question “where were you when all this happened?” Never in a million years would I have thought that something like that would happen at a party. I doubt Thabo anticipated that something like that would happen at the party. And now he has to live with the guilt, just like I have to.

    Thabo, it will be very unfair to her for you to get back with her out of guilt. She deserves to be loved wholeheartedly and unconditionally, she doesn’t deserve sympathy love. If her status is the only issue you have then educate yourself about it. 1 thing though is that be there for her, help her deal with these issues even if as a friend. But she doesn’t deserve love under false pretence, don’t do that to her.

    1. eish am really sorry for what happened to your sister and her friend i dont know where this rape culture is coming from ngempela but its everywhere now,hope their recieved all the help they needed.

  14. the responses that Thabo got prompted me to comment on this letter. People please learn to read with understanding and stop being emotional unnecessarily. Thabo didn’t ask you guys for your pity he asked you for advice on his situation. He said he thought the lady had gone psycho when he was dumped without explanation not that the lady is psycho. Now he is feeling guilty about what the lady went through and what she is still going through because of her status. Pillzburry you gave a constructive advice hope Thabo takes it. @ Tsaluuur sorry about what happened to your sister with time Got will heal you all.@ Zuma i like your comment people can be such hypocrites. @Thabo you have no control over what happened and please try therapy with the lady as it will help you both heal and it will help you to overcome all those guilt feelings and please ignore all those nasty comments.

  15. NIce one Mike’esto
    Nothabo relationship is fucked in my view, man are programmed differently, she can plead the fifth all she wants. The seed is planted in hubby head the she got shagged. Damage done.
    Q&A T-boz would be interesting to know you age and dynamics of you relationship. when i say dynamics, was she a trophy chick or your boo. Because those factors will say allot about your psyche.
    Bottom line is she needs you, your rejection could do more damage. You pity is real and natural, but dating her based on pity I would like to say i don’t believe it, you demons killing you too. Its you blaming yourself too.
    Like the old question would carry on dating someone after they burn their face and loose the legs. Matured person in love would, an immature superficial person wouldn’t. What the matured person will have still is Pity. So wena who are you in the analogy.
    Don’t let her down brother

  16. Q&A: Sorry for what happened to your galfriend Thabo. Thanks for sharing your story with us. I think we all need to learn from this. As hard as it is to speak to someone after being raped, it is crucial that u get help as soon as possible. U need to seek medical help and start ARVs within 72hrs (if I’m not mistaken) to try and prevent the virus from multiplying (i.e if u are HIV negative). Maybe for now Thabo just be there for her and take her for counselling. Put the relationship on hold whilst u also get your head around the whole situation. It won’t do her any good if u are with her out of pity. It is possible to date a positive person and u remain negative. U still have a fulfilling relationship.

  17. hhayini guys stop blaming Thabo hle, Thabo do not be in a relationship with this girl if you feel pity more than love for her, just be there for her as a friend, askis bro

  18. Bhuti Nkululeko, kubonga mina.
    Nothabo must take a chillpill now. Enough aggression already & under the influence of m-i-law. Her bossy attitude towards hubby is not sexy. Actually it cud backfire. Come on now. MIL must fight her own battles already!
    Thabo, thnx 4sharing yo story. As Sunshine327 put it, lots of lessons 4all of us to learn both boys/man & girls/women.
    I aways thot animals were more cruel to 1another but yo story shows we humans can actually learn a lot of “human” from real animals.
    Thabo, jst try to be there for her, even just as a friend till U both get professional help. Then U will figure out the future whether as jst friends or lovers. Its not yo fault these excuse for humans raped her. Be the shoulder she needs to lean on. – PapaG.

  19. Thnx bra mike…T.bos u really ddnt deserve ths kind of response rather I thnk ur gal deserved it, who stl dnt knw tht once u raped u hev to rash to de clinic n why she couldn’t trust you enough n I thnk sum whr somehow she blames you aswell bt to tell you de truth u so innocent frm all ths jus be de fr her…And ppl plz read our comments wt understanding before commenting…once again Mike…dnt make us why we r Xhosa’s I cnt stand de criticism anymor, in ur diary or outside ts too much.

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