Growing Up Relevant

Growing Up – Chapter 20

Almost every girl has had friends that used their name when they lie to their parents. They might want to go and spend time with their boyfriends, they will lie to their parents and say they are going out with you. It’s okay if the friend tells you and informs you of their plans, not the ones who use you as their alibi and don’t inform you. This happened to me in high school, a friend of mine wanted to sleep at her boyfriend’s house, so she told her mom she was going to sleep at my house. Unfortunately she was involved in a car accident, while she and the boyfriend were coming back from a party.

Her mom called in the middle of the night and asked me what kind of a friend was I to leave her daughter in hospital and not even call her. I was shocked and I explained that I don’t have a clue what she was talking about. I then woke my sister up and we went to the hospital. We found the mother and she told me her side of the story. Apparently her daughter told her that we had study sessions every weekend at my house because there weren’t any disturbances at my house. Her mom believed her and encouraged her to come every weekend.

So this girl was using my name as her alibi every weekend she went to her no-good boyfriend.

Philani here was telling his mom that he was with me because we heard a female voice. He probably did this every time he didn’t want to come and see his mom. He is such a coward, couldn’t he just say no and not include my name. Now the question in my mind was “who is he with?”

Mrs Mazibuko: “That doesn’t sound like Hlengiwe’s voice.”

Philani: “Since when are you an expert in voice detection? Mama I’m spending some quality time with my woman Hlengiwe. I have been neglecting her for a while now and you know she will be angry if I leave. I will come see you tomorrow. Love you.”

Before his mother could respond, he hung up. His mother was left in awe, she didn’t know what to say. I stood up and said goodbye to his mother. She asked me to sleep at her house because it was getting dark and I was angry, and that for her was a bad combination for driving. This woman was mad, she thinks I would be able to sleep knowing that my man was busy shagging another woman, I was determined to find out who he was with. I politely declined her offer and made my way out. She told me to tell her as soon as I arrived home.

I sped to Philani’s place and arrived there very quickly. I had keys to his place, so I let myself in. I gently opened the door, at the back of my mind I was hoping that I will find him asleep or watching TV. I didn’t prepare myself for what I saw, although there was a high possibility that I would walk into this.

Lerato was naked lying on the kitchen counter, Philani was licking something off her body, it looked like whipped cream. It was very clear that they were enjoying themselves tremendously, they didn’t even see me walk in. I wanted to take something and smash it on top of her body, but that would get me into trouble.

Me: Philani wenzani? (What are you doing?)

I doubt it registered in his mind that I was there because he murmured ‘mhhhh you want me to stop?’

Me: Yes Philani I would love you to stop. What are you doing with Lerato?

After I said this they were shocked and stopped, they stared at me. Philani walked towards me, I was now in tears. I knew that something was going on between these two but I was hoping that Philani would remain loyal and not cheat.

Philani: Baby I can explain… uhm…

Me: Explain what? Philani why, I’m not enough for you. How long has this been going on?

Lerato: Clearly you not enough sweety, he’s getting some real loving from me.

This girl was picking a fight on the wrong day, and I didn’t have the energy to fight with her. I was weak, really weak. There was no ounce of anger in me, in this moment I felt pain. After she said that I just looked at Philani helplessly, I was really disappointed in him.

Philani: Lerato maaaan… Hlengi love let’s go and talk in the bedroom.

Me: No thanks I’m not interested.

Philani: Baby please…

I walked away, when I walked out of the house it was raining heavily. I don’t like to drive while there is a heavy rain, but I couldn’t stay at Philani’s place.

I ran to my car and broke down, I was seriously and deeply hurt. I drove while crying. It was already very dark, the rain was pouring and my eyes were blurry because of the tears. The streets were empty, I was waiting at a robot when the robot was green, I drove.

Suddenly I saw a car coming towards me from a different direction, the car was coming straight to my car. By the time it registered to me that I was going to be involved in an accident, it was too late and I could do anything. The car crashed into mine..

CRASH!!!! BOOM!!!!!

After a while I woke up, it took me a few minutes to realise that I was in hospital. After realising where I was, I remembered why I was there. I had a car accident after I caught Philani with Lerato. The nurse realised that I was awake and called the doctor. He did some check-up’s and said he was happy with my recovery. Apparently I have been in hospital for 3 days. The doctor told me that he was going to call my fiancé… who the hell was my fiancé? I gave him a confused look.

Me: Who are you talking about Doctor?

Doctor: I’m talking about Filani Mzibuku, your fiancé.

Hahaha Filani Mzibuku, wow neh. White people expect us to pronounce their names and master their language, but they don’t do that when it comes to us. And since when is Philani my fiancé? Mxm I’m not even sure if I want to see him.

Why is he even saying Philani is my fiancé?

Me: Oh, his name is Philani not Filani.

Doctor: You know you people, your names are hard to pronounce?

Me: “Don’t make pronunciation an excuse, there is nothing hard with saying Philani. And what do you mean when you say ‘You people’?

I was pissed off at this stage, why are we black people referred to as ‘you people’ by white?

Doctor: I didn’t mean anything, I was just….never mind, let me go and call your fiancé.

After about half an hour, Philani arrived with a box of chocolates and a bunch of flowers. Normally I would be happy when he comes bearing gifts, but just not now.

Philani: Angel I’m so glad you are awake. I’ve missed your voice.

I kept quiet, I didn’t know how to respond to him.

Philani: Love please talk to me, say something please.

Me: Ufuna ngithini Philani?” (What do you want me to say Philani?)

Philani:“Anything love, I want to know how you are feeling.

Me: Obviously I’m in pain.

Philani: I’m sorry baby, I’m really sorry. I feel like you wouldn’t have had the accident if it weren’t for me.

Me: You got that right.

Philani: You blame me for the accident?

What did this guy expect, who did he want me to blame? Obviously I blamed him and his Lerato. I blamed him for my physical and emotional pain.

Me: No, I blame God! Of course I blame you Philani. If I didn’t walk into what I walked into, I wouldn’t have had  this accident.

Philani: This accident wouldn’t have happened if you had informed me that you were coming, like you normally do. That way we could have avoided any drama and accidents.

Was Philani serious though? Did he think about what he just said or he just spoke before thinking? He was shifting the blame to me. I don’t believe this.

Me: So this is entirely my fault?

Philani: I didn’t say that, I was just trying to show you that a lot wouldn’t have happened had you called me and told me that you were coming. But I know that this is my fault, I’m very sorry.

Me: Philani please leave.

He refused to leave and stayed there. I looked to the other side and sobbed silently. I eventually fell asleep and was woken up by my sister.

Thenjiwe:“Hlengy nana please don’t do that to me again tu, I was so scared that I would lose you.

Me: You won’t get rid of me that easily, besides I’m not badly hurt.

Thenjiwe: I don’t care whether you are badly hurt or not, I don’t want you to be hurt at all. I shouldn’t be stressed remember that I’m pregnant.

Trust my sister to make everything about her.

Thenjiwe: Shame your man must be exhausted, every time I come I find him here, but I told him to go and get some rest. He said he will come back in the afternoon.

Me: Even if he doesn’t come back it’s fine.

Thenjiwe: Why are you saying that? Did you guys fight?

Me: No, we didn’t. What I mean is that I won’t mind if he doesn’t come. After all I’m okay now, so he doesn’t have to be here all the time.

I didn’t want to tell my sister the truth because I was going to forgive Philani and she wasn’t going to forgive him. The problem with telling your family or friends about things that your man does, is that even after you have forgiven him, they will always hold it against him. So she just nodded and ate the chocolate he came with. After a while she gave me my phone, which surprisingly only had a cracked screen.

After she left, I went through my messages, most of them were from the Apostle Thulani. I called him and told him to come and see me as I was in hospital. He promised to come and see me later. Other messages were from my friends wishing me a speedy recovery.

He arrived at about 7pm, he stood at the door and stared lovingly at me. Damn this man was hot, so hot it should be a crime.

Thulani: “You look beautiful even in your deathbed.

Me: Hahahaha deathbed? I’m not dying?”

Thulani: How are you feeling?

Me: I’m okay, I don’t feel as bad as I look.

Thulani: Atleast you didn’t get your face messed up, it would’ve been a pity. I missed you and I’m sorry for the way I spoke to you.

Me: “It’s okay.”

He kissed me, when he stopped Philani walked in. Did he see us kiss? That would be the best revenge, and he would feel a glimpse of the pain I felt when I walked in on him and Lerato.



20 thoughts on “Growing Up – Chapter 20

  1. Hlengy you are a sucker for punishment , he keeps on cheating you taking him back, as long you dont do changes he wont stop .

  2. Apostol ha ikgate maan!,phila ke skatana sa monna tjo,hw cn he even say dat,so Hlengiwi mst always inform him dat she’s coming? What a lousy excuse mxm,!
    Danki ausi

  3. Mara why you still want to “forgive ” him?
    Do u really want aids or some std to prove that this man not for u?

    Clap once the things us women put ourselves through.

  4. Hlengy now is so stupid though, Philani has clearly shown her what his all about, yet she’s still thinking about forgiveness and marriage. Talking about being desperate mxm!

  5. We women are stupid, I mean what are you teaching people? That being abused emotionally is right? I stop reading this diary now. And to all those who will say
    “Go we do not care” the mentality that cheating and being a door mat is in you all. I am done. Like naivete does not look attractive on any woman. Forgive my foot, imagine he is licking a side dis and he does not do that to you? Foolish woman.

    This is what happens when a blog gets too many writers, the whole charm that caught us in the first place dissappers.

  6. Dankie Khanyi.
    Fact that Nash is complaining means yo writing is touching ppl. Its making somebody understand ‘not so smart’ decisions other ppl take out there. And it happens all the tym. Ppl under the spell of love make decisions with their hearts not their heads. Love decisions aren’t as clear cut as business decisions. Food for thought.
    U coming alright sisi. – PapaG.

  7. Hlengi I thnk u shud stop worrying whether he saw u or not,live ur life and let him live his,philani is a womaniser str8 and two beers

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *