Growing Up Relevant

Growing Up – Chapter Nine

Morning friends. We will not be posting Realities or Rumblings for the duration of the week. We would like to give Growing p Relevant a fair run on its own before it returns to its original Sunday slot. Hope you enjoy it.


For this Christmas we have enough books that got delivered from the publisher. We are having a special for November andDecember. We have 8500 copies on our online store, this makes for a perfect gift. This is for the HARD COPY. If you wanna do things the traditional way herein banking details:
Wakahina Media Pty (LTD)
Standard Bank
Acc: 332622398
Branch: 012645
Cheque account

Send your book order and proof of payment to

Oh the price is R165 per copy use this coupon code for the discount amount, code: doazg

Thank you & God bless


Why do men cheat? Do they cheat because they can’t control themselves? Do they cheat because we aren’t good enough for them? What is the real reason behind cheating? Cheating on a woman is not a nice thing, but it’s extremely bad if you cheat on your woman with a girl she knows, even worse if it’s a girl from church.

Church is a place of worship but some guys have turned it into a playground to play girls. Girls resent each other because these guys play them. Some guy from church dated a girl for a few years. Everyone knew that they were a couple, we all looked up to them, and the guy even told us continuously that he is going to marry her. They were inlove, or so it seemed. We suddenly heard that the guy was getting married but not to his long time girlfriend. He married some girl, his long time girlfriend was hurt, not only because he married another girl but because the girl he married was from our church, so she knew that they were a couple. The girl is now expected to get over it and be nice to the married couple. I personally believe it is unfair for people to expect that from her, one just doesn’t get over a failed relationship. If I were her I would find a new church.

So this Mlungisi guy was playing two people I care deeply about, we didn’t even know that Thando and Mlu were dating, but that is no suprise because Thando is a very private person. I had to confirm with Tshiamo whether or not she was really dating Mlu.

Me: “I didn’t know that they were dating.”

Thandiwe: “They have been dating for a few months now and they eventually had sex but that fool didn’t use a stupid condom, I mean who doesn’t use a condom? That guy is really stupid, I don’t like him.”

I didn’t want to discuss this further,because when they find out about Mlu and Tshiamo, it will be as if I was snooping information for Tshiamo.

Me: “Hahaha give him a chance, he is the father of your niece/nephew, so you guys need to get along. Anyway what are you going to do in my hood.”

Thandiwe: “Eish girl I’m craving some sex, and my man is at work. So I have a sex partner in your hood. I need to release some things, I can’t handle being sexually starved.”

Me: “So you are cheating on your man?”

Thandiwe: “No, I would never cheat on him. I’m not having a relationship with anyone besides my man, what me and my man is super deep, deeper than love. Having sex with someone else isn’t cheating, I’m not involving my emotions in the whole thing. It just purely sexual pleasure, then I go back home. You know I truly believed that God loves us when I began to have sex. It is the best thing ever.”

I just laughed, Thandiwe was one of a kind. She is the complete opposite of Thando, unlike Thando who was educated, ambitious, God-fearing and humble, she dropped out of University during her 1st year, she doesn’t plan on ever going back to school, she worked at some retail store but she quit after a few months. Thando often told me that she was worried about Thandiwe’s future, she didn’t want Thandiwe to be dependent on her, their parents or a man. They had an old brother who was a successful lawyer, Thando was also climbing the corporate ladder and Thandiwe on the other hand was just the black sheep of the family.

Thandiwe’s phone rang and she cursed before she answered the phone.

Thandiwe: “Didn’t I tell you to stop calling me?”

I couldn’t hear what the other person said but Thandiwe hung up after the person spoke.

Thandiwe: “This stupid boy is irritating me now.”

Me: “Who is he?”

Thandiwe: “It’s some guy I met at a friend’s braai last week, we spoke for a while then we exchanged numbers. I went to visit him at his place the next day, then we obviously got it on. The sex was good but we decided to not do it again because I know his girlfriend. But now the man is busy calling me because he wants us to hook up. He’s irritating me now because we agreed to not do it again.”

Hahahaha Thandiwe was very open about her sexual life she didn’t care whether you judged her or not. We carried on driving and I left her where she wanted me to leave her.

I went home and placed a few orders for the products I use, then I watched TV. I browsed through my phone and saw the 1st photo Philani and I took together. It was 2 months after we started dating. My mind took me to the early days of my relationship with Philani.

I was fresh out of matric, I was working part-time for a lady named Latoya. She worked as a skin therapist and on weekends she was a make-up artist for weddings and parties. This particular weekend, Philani’s sister was getting married and Latoya was going to be doing the make-up and as her assistant I had to be there. Latoya normally goes to her clients the previous day before the wedding so that she can show them how they will look with make-up on. While we were driving to Philani’s home,Latoya’s car decided to get stuck. Latoya called the bride ( Philani’s sister) to find us people to come and fetch us, she also called her car husband. The bride told us that her brother was coming to fetch us, after waiting for a while, the brother finally arrived. He introduced himself as Philani, and he helped us take our things into his car. Latoya’s man finally arrived with some guys ad they towed Latoya’s car.

We then drove to the bride’s home. The bride introduced herself as Thabile, so while Latoya was working her magic with the bride, the bride’s mother asked me to come and make some food for myself. I was alone in the kitchen, so I took time to find things, while I was busy I found the guy who fetched us earlier looking at me, that made me feel uncomfortable. He sat in one of the stools and asked me to pour him some juice and biscuits. I did as told, he began to ask me questions and he felt offended when he realised that I forgot his name. I was becoming uncomfortable so I excused myself. Latoya finally finished and Philani had to take us home. Latoya asked him to drop us at the garage, her husband was going to fetch us there. We arrived at the garage, and Philani insisted on waiting with us until Latoya’s husband arrived. We waited for a while, Latoya then decided to go outside and call her husband. Philani decided to use this time to his advantage.

Philani: “Can you please give me your number?”

Me: “Why do you want my number?”

Philani: “I want to see you after the wedding. I know that if I don’t ask you today, I will probably never see you again.”

Me: “I will give you tomorrow.”

Philani: “What if I don’t see you tomorrow? Tomorrow will be a busy day and we might not get a chance to speak.”

I didn’t respond to him, I just looked outside the window.

Latoya’s husband finally arrived and Philani said he doesn’t mind dropping me at home. Latoya was more than happy with that offer because she was tired. I was so angry that I was going to spend about 30 minutes with this irritating guy. We drove away, he was trying to make some small talk but I only gave him one word answers. His phone rang, what caught my attention about his phone call was that they were talking about God, so this guy was clearly a Christian. After his phone call I loosened up a bit and we spoke about our respective churches. We arrived at my house and he drove away, when I walked inside the house, I felt stupid for not giving him my number.

On the wedding day I didn’t get to talk to him, he only greeted me and didn’t say anything further. I wanted to give him my number but he didn’t ask. The wedding came to an end and we left. A few days after the wedding, my sister was still living with me. We heard a car park outside the house followed by a knock on the door. We thought it was my sister’s man, so she went to open the door, she came back and told me that there was a man there to see me.

I walked to the kitchen and was surprised to see Philani standing at the door. I was happy to see him, but I was angry because I was looking very shabby. I was wearing a doek,night dress, gown and sleepers. He wasn’t suppose to me like this but I was really impressed with the fact that he didn’t forget the way to my house, he took a chance and came. He didn’t come empty handed, he came bearing gifts, he had a box of chocolates with him.

From that day on, Philani and I have been member of #Loveliveshere..His softness and patience makes it easy for me to depend on him, I don’t think I will ever be able to function without Philani. He understands my simplistic approach to life and has encouraged my growth in alot of things. Although he has his faults, he gives me the most real love I know. He makes me feel beautiful, special and precious. I just love this man oh my Philani.

My thoughts about my relationship were disturbed by an sms from Philani, it read : “I can’t do this anymore. I’m sorry if I gave you false hope, I don’t want to lose Hlengiwe. You are a beautiful and amazing woman I hope you will find the love you deserve. I’m really sorry Rato.”

73 thoughts on “Growing Up – Chapter Nine

  1. Thanks Khanyi…. great job. so now that Philani got what he wanted…ey!! i’m heartbroken for girls who have gone through this pain. ku rough

  2. For writers, yall really suprise me.This is no way of doing things.You do not need to force some of us to read ”Growing up”. YOU DID THE SAMETHING WHEN ”doazg” was hotcakes,and then you went and did it again ka Mxolisi’s story.When you cut off stories, some of us just stop reading and go find something else that is consistent. This is a total reading displeasure and a huge turn off.I suggest you maintain momentum or you will lose readers.Hawu

        1. You’re clearly not in a professional environment I see.They’re forcing me to read ”Growing up” and ANDIFUN.Kalok I have supported him from day one.So he too must return the favor

      1. For free?Data is NOT free.My time is NOT free.It is because of us that this blog is what it is.And no1 even told him to make it free, he chose to.If he charged, I will still read cause I enjoy the books.The same way I m paying on Saturdays so spare me the BULLSHIT!

    1. Maggie when compared to other books that we get for free, Mike and his team have been very consistent. This comment is not profounded and uncalled for. Especially when a reason has been stated as to why this decision has been made.

  3. I really don’t like this week’s arrangement… was looking forward to rumblings… so disappointed… but hey… beggars are not choosers #NotCool

  4. am I the only one who thinks this Growing up story is a bore? it sounds like its written by a grade 8 learner. “its some guy I met at a friend’s braai next week”??? hai ngeke….

  5. Eish too bad! I am enjoying the new addition “Growing up” but I also luuuurve me some Rumblings! I find myself relating to it more with each chapter

    thank you so much guys. Keep it up

  6. This is Total disrespectful to us as your readers, you cant force a book on us it was right where it was on Sunday and those who like it read it, now u cut two not one but two books that we love. Books might be free but it is our time we take to come to this site and we do it with data the least you could do is respect us and our time…REMEMBER it is because of our loyal support that you have grown as a writer and you have so many advertisers advertising on your blog… so if one want to tell us not to complain coz its free no u are mistaken Mike is making money by you clicking on his website… so please Mike and Thozama please don’t force us to read Growing up please consider bringing back Rumblings and realities because some of us haven’t even started reading growing up and have no interest in it and we would like to stick to our routine. we have been supporting your blog since day 1 please don’t treat us like trash….

    1. I sooo wish there was a like button apha yaz plus mna i’ve given myself time to read GROWING UP but ndohlulakele coz iwriting style ingathi ibhalwa yi teenager.

    2. I am not sure that I have treated you like trash. I explained that for this week only we would like to give exposure to GUR and Sunday it will go back to its SLOT. It is not being forced on you. It’s ok not to like it but in the end there are those that do. Rumblings and Realities have not been cancelled. They are there and on Monday it’s business as usual. I am sorry to have disappointed you

      1. Mike, I think the dissatisfaction stems from the fact that you did not ask our opinion before making the decision to give GUR a chance. I believe a timely warning would have sufficed at least if we had no choice in the matter. I believe that’s where Cishly is coming from and the other readers that have agreed.

        It’s only a handful that are willing to give it a chance due to the writing style of this new writer. It makes it a little difficult to relate to it, I suppose because the “reader” has to 1st make sense of the grammar & spelling before grasping the story as well as the message it drives. I truly believe the story line has potential but the author might need to brainstorm with the likes of you and Thozama before publishing.

    3. I agree, I feel we have been taken for granted. You support a person and now they think they can make decisions on your behalf. Mike conside. You are where you are because of us.

  7. I’d like to know how old is this person who writes “growing up” coz the way abhala ngakhona ingathi yi 16 year old…

  8. i agree with Cishly thy shld hve atleast asked the readers wat thy think before cutting us off the other books coz we hve rely grown to enjoy rumblings and realities so its disappointing to knw we will only gt to read aftr a week

  9. People if you dont like it dont read it. we will see you all next week, we really dont need your negativity. Mike is giving someone a chance, a platform to also grow. NOBODY is forcing you to read anything. People with self-entitlements haibo.

    1. LOL my sentiments exactly Leratho, you’ll swear Mike said it’s a must for them to read growing up relevent, if they don’t like it, they should take a break for this week and come back next week… busy complaining for no reason

  10. Well said Leratho.. People like to complain even where it not necessary! Nobody is forcing you to read anything. Well done Khanyi. Growing up is interesting!!! Even when realities and rumbling started, people where complaining that they want DOZG back. So you will never satify ppl. You are not Jesus Christ for Godsake..

  11. Nice One Mile’esto
    Keep writing girl. Express yourself and well done mike for exposing other talents.
    More stories the better, they all have life lesson, which is awesome.
    Big to you team.

  12. I have received a similar sms as Hlengiwe, its heart-breaking to say the least. Chances are, she is going to fall for the lame explanation from Philani and suffer with doubt for the rest of their relationship.

    We all start somewhere I guess, writers included. Not everything written on these platforms will be to our liking, everyone has their preference. It is very unfortunate that we will not be getting Realities and Rumblings. I am going to give GU a chance and see how the storyline develops but the chapters are so short.

  13. Lol ai motho o montsho though! People talking about decisions made on their behalf,really? So mike must just let you make decisions on his blogs,because you support him?

  14. A notification before changing the schedule would have been nice, I have no problem with new writers being given a chance at all. But manje ngathi usiphuce ukudla emlonyeni

  15. Look at the bright side guys,there’s a lesson in this story somewhere and in order for Khanyi to grow as a writer,she has to start somewhere akereand this is where she starts,give her a chance and if you don’t like it, you just stop reading it. Support fam.

  16. When people say the writers are “forcing” them to read what they don’t want to read … lol aiiii, no one is forcing anyone to do anything … no one is holding a gun against your head lady … anyway, totally love the new read … Happy Tuesday family … ♡

  17. Such negativity though … It is so disappointing … People complain as though they are the ones writing… Realities and Rumblings will be back on Monday … but noooo people have zero chill… its really pretty simple though, if you have nothing nice to say then save your comment … you just adding to this hot weather with your nastiness …

  18. In the previous chapters the Zulu spelling has been completely wrong and I am Zulu so I find it annoying to read crappy Zulu but all in all the book is not bad, don’t hate, congratulate lmao!

  19. ‘A customer is the most important visitor on your premises” in this case your blog.”He is not depended on us we are depended on him” without your readers you wouldn’t be where you are today so you need your readers more. “He is not an interruption in our work, he is the purpose of it”your readers inspire you and give their views that help you grow in your business so respect them without your readers your blog wouldn’t be as successful ” He is not an outsider in our business he is part of it” Announce a week prior for any changes you are about to make on your blog because we are your blog we deserve to be given respect and a choice to give this new book a chance or seek alternative in time for the time rumblings and realities are on vacation. ” We are not doing him a favor by serving him, He is doing us a favor by giving us an opportunity to do so” Remember we are not complaining because we like to complain we are complaining because we have given you an opportunity to be part of our lives, we have allocated time for you in our daily routine because you have brought to us something amazing, the least you can do is respect us enough to notify us when you are going to make changes, not everyone like change but when notice is given they are given a choice! When I say u have treated us like trash I mean because you have no care in the world that u did not inform us about the week break u are taking but u just expect us to that swallow the pill and move on that is disrespectful. YOU SHOULD KNOW BETTER… It is up to you to ignore our complaints or do something about it..

  20. The problem with us humans is that we do not give constructive criticism. Not everything will start out perfectly. And life has taught me that it’s not about how you start but rather how you finish. When GU started Mike requested comments about wht ppl think. Not many ppl commented about disliking the blog. So how is Khanyi going to improve if we do not give her a chance? She will not improve unless some1 reads her blog and gives constructive criticism. Ppl are always quick to throw their toys out the cot without placing themselves in others shoes. If we stopped trashing each other and helped one another to grow, we would all be in better place. Continue writing Khanyi, we will crit your work and suggest ways of improvements.

  21. I see potential…I did not like rumblings n realities at the beginning but I saw potential hence I kept coming bek. Give Khanyi the platform Mike, she deserves it. we’ll see everybody else on Saturday that’s if they ever get pins for Missteps

  22. People complain about grammar but reading your comments, there are soo many grammatical errors that we have to think for ourselves what was to be written…….even on the normal books Mike fumbles the names at times.
    I was very very disappointed to see DUR as I was awaiting Faith. But if Mike would look at the number of people who support his books that he sells it’s not much,,, so sit ur selves down coz if we paid most of you would not pay so YEAH in that regard it is free!
    Mike you chose a wrong chapter to impose on the weekly schedule. I understand why you felt it needed to be introduced as I also saw it on its 6th chapter……but this chapter is missing something I even found myself scrolling down without reading… please move it back to its original spot….however if you truly feel it has to grow it will not do so with the feedback you are receiving.

  23. Hi Mike, I like all you books and thank you for keeping me entertained everyday. Its ok people don’t have to like or read all your books but those who do like myself will. Its not a train smash. Which ever book you post, notified or not makes no difference to me. I say ‘bring it on’

  24. Yeer! Beyond annoyed. I tried giving this diary a chance , but she goes on an on an on… hai. That whole story of how she met Pilani I literally didn’t not finish reading that got bored!
    Mike… include us next time u decide to make such drastic changes!!! #Dissapointed. Really annoyed by this whole arrangement… which u didnot even try to warn us of.

  25. ‘Man is by nature a political animal’-aristotle I’ll leave this here and which ever way you choose to interpret it is your business…

    Mike in a relationship its always vital to communicate.The relationship being between you and your readers in this dont just drop a bomb and expect us to dust the ashes off. I feel where the complaining squad is coming from,well they might not be doing it the right way but its still the truth.
    I personally have become soo addicted to ur blog that I read anything and everything that you post (growing up included)and if you were to decide to shut it down for what ever reason I’d be devasted but id still live..everyone would,now imagine if people stopped reading because of all this inconsitency..u need us as much as we need you…basically what m trying to say is..growing up is ok..the writing style is not..that’s why its not enjoyable(my opinion).so the next time you decide to pull a stunt like this let us know in advance,just like you do during the festive season.

  26. Guys i really feel disappointed by how some of you are bad mouthing Mike and team.
    We all take time to grow as individuals and Mike is giving a young writer a chance to do so. This takes time and you guys shouldn’t be expecting a ‘Grammy award’ instead we should support the writers,help them build confidence and in turn the stories in the long run will be interesting. There should have been a warning before hand about the other stories,i agree, but don’t use this inconvenience as a platform for such negativity and harsh words. If you really don’t like the story then don’t read it. keep the rude comments to yourself. These guys put in a lot of work just to make there are stories for you to read,having to be creative is not as easy as it seems,so shut up about your data and appreciate their efforts.

  27. Dankie braMike for giving an aspiring writer a chance.
    My complaint is “auditing & mentorship.”
    Not sho tho if U have time to correct grammar & spellings on GU as yo own writings are also usually posted “raw”. No auditing mostly even tho yo mistakes have decreased recently. I think U don’t necessarily have to outsource & pay for that. Btwn the 3 of U, why can’t U proof-check each other before posting?
    This will make reading more interesting & more professional. Khanyi needs yo guidance a lot to develop her creativity.
    Telling a story like telling a joke has a punchline. U need to grab yo listener/reader and entice them here & there & then deliver.

    At the moment the weakness of the story at times coupled with poor grammar/spelling makes a reader lose interest thereby missing the direction of the story. – PapaG.

  28. Yoh people are rude though, what if Khanyi was your little sister? Trying to make a career in writting, now you are busy bashing and trying to kill her drive. Oh humans. And I dont see any relevance to being notified, for what? For who? Its really annoying. The team should post whatever they want, after all it is their blog.

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