Growing Up Relevant

Growing Up – Chapter Five

Pastors have Facebook? They don’t need it maan, they would make it hard for us to write whatever we wanted, because we respect them so much. My Pastor didn’t have Facebook, we only have a Facebook page at church, that was coordinated by the youth. So to say I was shocked that Philani’s pastor has Facebook would be an understatement, if I knew I was talking to a Man of God, I would have been more polite.

Me: oh Apostle, I’m sorry. I didn’t check who I was talking to. I thought you were one of those Facebook guys.

Thulani: it’s okay beautiful. I understand, a woman like you probably gets inboxes every day.

Me: beautiful?

I dozed off while he was typing. I was tired. I woke up to find a couple of messages from him.

Thulani: Yes beautiful, you are a very beautiful lady.
So are you guys planning on getting married?
You probably fell asleep. Goodnight.

Me: Sorry I dozed off. Good morning, have a great day.

Thulani: Thank you, have a great day too beautiful.

I was really flattered that a man of his calibre took notice of me and thought I was beautiful. Phela Pastors are very important people.

Days passed, Philani and I were okay, we were not great or happy, and we were just on speaking terms. The Pastor and I continued chatting every day, and I can safely say we were flirting.

It was a Sunday, the girls and I went to church, we attended the same church. We had to arrive early for intercession. Church began and it was good. The Pastor’s daughter was pregnant, people were gossiping about her, I felt sorry for her because we were a bit close and she was a very sweet girl. Apparently the baby-daddy was one of the young pastors or the guys in the band. Church gossip is the worst; you could never run away from it, it was even worse if you were a well known member in the church. I wonder how she was going to deal with this. She was stopped from taking part in all church activities, but the guy who made her pregnant remained anonymous and unharmed. This is what we church girls go through, you can mess up with a man but only you as the woman will be blamed, and the guy will get off scot-free. That was our reality.

After church Sihle and I left together, Tshiamo told us that she would be a bit late. We arrived home and began to cook, the Pastor called me and said he wanted to come and see me, I gave him directions. While I was waiting for him for him, Tshiamo was dropped off by a car, the car looked very familiar. She was very happy when she walked into the house…she was hoping like a frog.

Me: “Someone is happy today. Ujabuliswe yini?”

Tshiamo: “Yes I’m happy ladies. The person who made me happy is the guy who dropped me off. Don’t act like you guys didn’t see that a car dropped me off.”

Me and Sihle were shocked……we screamed we asked her many questions at once….who is it? When did you start?

Tshiamo: “Well it is Mlu from church.”

Me: “Mlu? Our Mlu? The same Mlu who plays drums for the worship team? Oh I knew that the car looked familiar.”

Tshiamo: “Yes that Mlu, and his not our Mlu, he is my Mlu. We had our 1st kiss today. He is so sweet guys.”

Sihle: “Finally the grumpy old girl gets a man. I hope this means you will stay out of our business.”

Before I could ask any further questions the Pastor called and told me he was outside. I quickly went to fix myself. When I walked out he came out of the car, greeted me and opened the door for me. We sat in the car and spoke about everything from his ministry to his failed marriage to relationships. While I was with him Philani called and said he is coming to fetch me, we are going to see my sister, so I must get ready. Eish uPhilani uyabora shame.

Me: “ApostIe Philani is on his way, so you have to go.”

Thulani: “Please don’t call me Apostle. Call me Thulani, I’m just a guy after all. Can’t you tell Philani that you are sick? I don’t want to go.”

Me: “Sorry I can’t hey. Philani will come rushing if I say I’m sick.”

We said our goodbyes; he came to open the door for me. Before I could walk away, he grabbed me and kissed me, I pushed him away while I was trying to make sense of what just happened. I asked him what he was doing and he said it was obvious and kissed me again, this time I responded. He was moving his hands all over my body. He squeezed my butt, my boobs and moved his hand across my cookie…he was brushing it, on top of my clothes, my hormones went haywire. Yoh I can’t explain how it felt but that man knew what he was doing. He told me that he’s wanted to kiss me since he met me. We kissed again and broke the kiss; I walked back into the house while he was staring at me. I think I liked the Pastor.
The Pastor was a great kisser, maybe all Pastors were great kissers, but I wasn’t planning to try all of them. Philani eventually arrived and we went to my sister’s place. Maybe it’s surprising why Philani was the one who decided that we go to my sister. Philani and my sister’s husband, Mduduzi, we very close so he invited us for supper.
On the way Philani was busy talking but my mind was on the Pastor’s lips and the way he touched me. I think I wanted more, Philani was great but the Pastor was different. We arrived at my sister’s, Thenjiwe’s, place. My sister and I didn’t see each other as much as we should, so I was excited that I was going to see her. My sister looked more like my mom as she grew older.

The look on my sister’s face was enough to tell me that she also missed me as well

Thenjiwe: “ Huu Hlengy my baby”

She gave me a tight hug, there was something different about her. She was glowing and gained a bit of weight. I went to hug my brother in law

Me: Sawbona buthi Mdu, what are you feeding my sister? She gained a bit of weight.”

I didn’t want to say fat, you never tell a woman that she is fat. That is very demeaning. I would cry if a person said I was fat. If you said I was fat, I would probably stop eating, I just didn’t like the word fat.

Mdu: “ haw Hlengy I’m feeding her happiness.”

He said that with a smug grin on his face

Thenjiwe: “ Literally.”

They all burst into laughter, including Philani. I guess I didn’t get the joke, I gave Philani the side eye and he sensed my irritation and stopped laughing.

Thenjiwe: “Guys let’s go to the eating area, food is ready.”

My sister was a great cook, she didn’t cook her food the boring way with rajah. Her food was different. We were talking about general things, I don’t know how the conversation got to sex and relationships.

Thenjiwe: “Hlengy I hope you are use contraceptives sisi, I don’t want you to fall pregnant and give him a child before he marries you.”

Hai my sister was inappropriate maan, I was shocked, I even chocked on my drink.

Philani: “The only form of prevention Hlengy uses is to deny me sex completely.”

Mdu couldn’t help but laugh

Mdu: “ yoh Ndoda, are you serious? You telling me that in all these years you guys never had sex? How do you survive mfethu?”

Philani: “Yes bra, I’m as good as a virgin now.” They both chuckled.

Thenjiwe: “Hlengiwe that should be a crime, you can’t do that to a grown man. He has needs, you want him to get it elsewhere?”

Philani: “Tell her Thenji, I’m sexually frustrated.”

Mdu: “Man, I have to give it to you, you are a better man than me.”

The conversation about me starving Philani went on and on, I was getting really bored. I, however noticed how much it would mean to Philani if we had sex. So I decided that I was going to sleep over at his place and we could have the sex that he wanted. In a moment of weakness, we have had oral sex, so I guess it wouldn’t harm me to take it a step further. While we were busy talking my phone rang and I checked the caller id, it was the Pastor Thulani, I went to pick it up outside

Thulani: “Hey beautiful”

Me: “hey Apostle.”

Thulani: “Please stop calling me apostle, unless you come to visit my church, just call me Thulani. Listen I can’t stop thinking about you.”

Me: “Why can’t you stop thinking about me?”

Thulani: “Because you are such an amazing person. You are beautiful, and I wish I did more than kiss you.”

Me: “What more could you have done? And that kiss was a mistake Pastor, I mean Thulani. I’m inlove with Philani and I’m sorry if I gave you the wrong idea.”

I hung up before he could say anything further. I went back to the others, and after a short while my Thulani, I mean Thulani sent me a text saying that I’m on his mind! Eish this man is going to become a problem. My sister then made an announcement

Thenjiwe: “Guys the reason we called you here is to tell you that I’m 3 months pregnant.”

I was happy for her but I was worried because when my sister was in her teenage years, she was very tjatjarag, and one night she went out partying with her then boyfriend, they got an accident on their way back. My sister only found out on that day that she was pregnant, and had lost the baby in during the accident. The doctor told her that it would be a great risk to her health if she ever fell pregnant. I hoped for the best though because I’m a believer. I also wondered if she would cope with being a mom since we didn’t have any mother figure. She assured me that everything is going well so far and I didn’t have to worry. We sat a while then eventually left.

I told Philani that I wanted to sleep over at his place, this was the 1st time I offered to went to sleep there, the few times I’ve slept there were because he begged me. We went to my house and I took an overnight bag. When we arrived at his place, he went to take a shower, and my instincts told me that if I wanted to give him my virginity I must loosen up and join him in the shower.
It was definitely going down tonight.

6 thoughts on “Growing Up – Chapter Five

  1. Hi Khanyi, loving the story. Noticed U love narrating (a lot sometimes) & end up summarizing too much. Unfortunately summarizing makes U lose the “juice” part of the story. And the ” juice” of any story is the essence of writing. Its like having “braaied” meat vs fried or stew. U need all types of meat but braai is not as common, hence its usually done wknds mostly.

    That’s what brings out yo authorship style.
    For instance, the pastor’s daughter falling pregnant needed some direct speech (juice) on how scandalous ppl can be. That cud have made an interesting read if U have personally experienced it or done some research on it.
    Just my personal view & U don’t have to change on my account, just a suggestion. Keep up the good work! – PapaG

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