It’s not that I was greedy or insensitive to the situation but have you ever gone to a wedding and not been given food? That’s a no no because it automatically makes it the worst wedding ever. No matter what the location is, even if it was under the sea for all I care, no food means failure. Now that’s a wedding, what about dinner? The name of the event I was here for is dinner which equals food. Instead I had been served by two grown people fighting. That’s what people don’t know, when you see people living in mansions and driving fancy cars, they always assume that their problems are better than yours because they have money. That’s far from the truth unfortunately. High walls come with guarded secrets and family in fighting just as much as people with no fences if not worse.
“Come back here!”
I hear my boss shouting and doors were being banged.
“You can’t accuse me of cheating on you in front of children then walk away like a small brat! Come show me how and why I am cheating on you?”
This guy had it good. He could make it seem as though he was innocent because he was certain she had no ounce of proof on her side. I also felt she had lost her temper too quickly and should have waited for a better moment to take him on. Now she looked paranoid and disoriented but something she had started.
“You know you delete all your messages so how will I ever find out? You think you are so clever!”
She shouted back. This shit was getting real by the moment. Lunga stood up and went upstairs after them. I could hear him telling his father that they were embarrassing him but I did not hear what the father said. When he came back downstairs he looked rather dejected I was tempted to say that the father had planned all this for the dinner to have failed so spectacularly but was it not the mom who had started this fight.
“Is your mom going to be ok baby?”
Aurelia asked him so innocently. I don’t why people bother going to acting school because women can act. He gave her a glare but did not response.
“Lunga do you need us here? I think maybe this should be family time!”
I said to him at the same time my stomach was making hunger sounds. It was pointless being here if you consider how bad things had gone in a very short time. He had brought her flowers and that had been forgotten in less than a heartbeat.
“No please don’t go. I can’t handle these two when they get like this. Mum always pulls these stunts whenever we have happy moments and dad always talks her out of it!”
He said. Talk about a dysfunctional family. This can’t be life. Every day a new war to fight and worse in front of people. They had lost that respect for each other if they allowed themselves to humiliate each other in front of people like this. That divorce was long overdue maybe but what do I know, I grew up with a single parent!
“I think we should go!”
Aurelia said to me when more doors started banging upstairs. She was right. It did not feel to be safe here anymore. Lunga was a man he could take care of himself I am sure.
“I think so too!”
I agreed with her out loud. I was not going to stay and be called in as a witness by police if something drastic went wrong. Drama just seemed to follow me around lately and it is not a nice feeling. Lunga tried to ask us to stay longer but not in this environment. He offered to come with us but Aurelia said that it was best he stay with his family because right now they needed each other. This girl was something else. She was my friend yes but everything happening here I was because of her, no doubt! She was the other woman in this case and by the way she was acting it was like she had nothing wrong.
As soon as we got into the car and where out of the estate I had to say something and I said it.
“Aurelia, what are you going to do now?”
I asked her as we drove off. I could see her hands her shaking and what had happened in there had rattled her even though she tried to act calm and composed.
“Nothing, this has nothing to do with me!”
She said in such a dismissive manner. She kept her eyes on the road and started to play music. I switched it off immediately because I was not going to let her disrespect me like this even if we were in her car. She did not seem to care about what she was doing at all and friendship or not I had to say it.
“Stop this thing you are doing. You are my friend and I will always have your back but in this situation you are wrong. You are fucking the father and getting engaged to the son whilst you are working for the mother! What is wrong with you?”
I asked her angrily. She really was pissing me off with the way she was acting as though all was well with the world.
“What do you want me to do? It’s already done!”
She said. She had given up on her own situation as though she is not the one who had created it. I hate it when girls act the victim in messes of their own making.
“It’s not done because you are still doing it. Sorry to burst your bubble but Lunga knows about you and his dad! He has always known! He dated you to spite his father and yes, at some point ended up falling in love with you but he knows! How long do you think that’s going to last? What if he told his mother? You are too blind to even see that!”
I told her. She kept quiet for a moment and much as I was panicking inside I was not going to back down.
“How long have you known?”
She asked me. Maybe now was the time to shut up but now that I had brought it up there was no turning back. A friendship full of lies and secrets is not worthy of being called a friendship.
“A few weeks!”
I told her. I could see what she was doing, trying to place the blame on me.
“And you didn’t see it fit to tell me Faith?”
She asked me. I could not tell whether she was angry or not but like I said, I was already in so was not going to keep quiet about it.
“Yes. How can I tell you when you believe that you are so right and entitled to this? I warned you when you befriended Refiloe and you said you can handle it. I am your friend and this is me intervening. What Refiloe said I know you know was directed at someone? I don’t know if she knows but there was a way in which she said it which makes me worry even more about you!”
I warned her yet again. She was uncomfortable with being put on the spot that was clear but it had to be done.
“Yes I noticed that too and I felt guilty. These days the way she talks to me I feel like there is something she is not telling me. You could be right. What should I do?”
She asked me. Wow, that went better than I thought. I thought she would stop the car or something and tell me to walk the rest of the way for not telling her but she did not. I suspect she already knew what was coming and was prepared for it.
“What should you do?”
I asked her incredulously but much as I thought I had answers they just would not come immediately.
“You will have to break up with both of them!”
I gave her in my honest opinion.
“If i do that then I would have wasted my time. All these years going back and forth, it’s not easy to start afresh.”
She said to me. I doubt very much that she was listening to me because if she still needed answers for that then she was really in trouble.
“Have you thought of what’s going to happen especially now that he knows about Lunga and you?”
I asked her. She laughed then she sighed defeated.
“I don’t know but am scared. I had thought Refiloe would protect me because it will be very odd if he fights his daughter in law in front of everyone!”
She had it all figured out didn’t she. What a delusional little bitch! Women can be so cold and calculated at times. All she was seeing in all this was what her benefit was.
“Aurelia, if Refiloe finds out, if she does not know already, she will kill you. There is no other word I can think of!”
I told her. Yes that troubled her. She was in too deep and there was no turning back in her mind.
“Lunga emptied his savings to buy you a ring and you accepted it. What would you do that Aurelia? You used to be an independent free thinking girl but now you seem to think without his money you cannot be yourself and that’s bullshit!”
I told her. She is not the only girl doing that though. I read on twitter the other day some guy who went off on these wayward girls and I totally agreed with him. He said things like, ‘you will find girls with degrees that will do anything to get to a man’s money. Tell me please maybe I am the stupid one here but, how is chasing another’s man’s money your hustle? Every Instagram picture you post is in the club, airport, or in bed hungover! Take a picture of your work for a change tu! Aurelia was like all those so many girls selling themselves for trips abroad and money who funny enough still don’t believe they are prostitutes. She was no different from those half naked girls flashing their goodies on Instagram but have the never to judge the girls on the side of road. I was so angry at her now and girls like her. They will lose all their morals for status forgetting that they can make their own money too if they wanted.’ That was Aurelia for you. She was educated from a good university at that but when you listen to her it was like she had never had brains in that pretty head of hers! No matter why men don’t respect us. Its girls like these that do that to us.
“I have said my piece now what you do is up to you. Break this engagement and break up with these men. They are bed for you and if you not lucky it’s going to cost you more than just your dignity.”
I warned her. The rest of the trip was quiet. I had given her a lot to think about and with good reason. I had wanted us to stop and buy food but with the way it was so tense I decided to let it slide. Will make bread when I get home or something. No use trying to flog a dead horse.
She left without saying bye.
“You are back so soon?”
My sister asked me when I got in. I told her of the fight that had taken place without telling her all the details. She could not believe that people would fight in front of strangers but it was fact and had happened.
“Mum told me to tell you that your trip is off. She said that Meladi is sick but they want you to go with Mudenda alone!”
I don’t think I heard that correctly.
Must be more tired than I thought!
Michael Nkululeko Maphoto (fb)
Good Morning Zulu Girl Family
Hope everyone is doing well. Mike thank you for the wonderful reads we get every morning and for the platform you gives us as readers to share our stories and get advice. Family please help I’ve been dating my boyfriend for three years now and we want to take things to the next level.
We both 24 have no kids, kind of doing okay in our Jobs….and both still live with our mothers. We’ve recently started buying things for a house as we looking to buy a house together in June thing is I do not know how to say it to my family.
I come from a very strict family, anything that we (my cousins and I) want to do has to be presented to the elders of the family and only then will you be given permission to do it. I do not do as I please I am not even allowed to sleep out (even though my mom lets me sleep out once in a while).
When speaking to Mom she reckons he must pay Lobola first then will I be allowed to move out of home, we fully understand that however that is not what we currently want to do, we want to get married when we 27 so we will probably start negotiations when he is 26 and he cannot marry me whilst he is still living at home (where will we live after the wedding???) nor can I buy a house and still stay with my mother and let him live alone there. It’s not about me just to live with my man it’s about me growing up wanting to take charge of my life, and I’m turning 25 next year how long will I be subjected to stay at home and get married first before I can own my home (My sister is 35 and still lives at home she got too comfortable it’s hard to move out now ) Even if we don’t get married I have to grow up at some point or am I missing the point here? Please advise on how to tackle this issue or if maybe I am wrong.
The twitter handle mentioned above is @lebolukewarm