Imagine the look on my face and. The thoughts that went through my head as I saw that. How would you react if it was you standing there seeing your husband getting into a car with another woman like this. This was cruel and unusual punishment. I was being tested! I did not get a clear look at her but I knew I knew her. I called Lintle and told her that we had to follow her father. She is not a child so when she asked me why I was all riled up all of a sudden I told her that her father had left with another woman. She knew exactly why when she saw the look on my face. It’s funny how. Life is, daughter always tend to take the side of the mother no matter how much you might fight. She took her jacket as she said,
“Mum dad would never cheat come on!”
It was time she grew up and realized that men are not the romanticized thing that us women make them out to be.
“All men cheat!”
I said coldly as I went to pick up the car keys. I was not even sure where I was following too but by God I was going to find this man and skin him alive by his balls if he still had them. How do you leave your wife and child in a hotel and sneak out the way he had? He could have taken the car and I would have been none the wiser! I love surprises yet but this was not a surprise and woman wants.
“Mom that’s not true. It’s just a generalization that people make. It’s dumb to put them all under one blanket and say if the shoe fits!”
What is it with us women and defending men? Even at a young age when we are just girls our first instinct is to defend them and actually blame ourselves for not trusting them. The irony is, every single woman has been cheated on, is being cheated on or will be cheated on. It’s not just by anyone, it’s by someone you love and trust. I needed to teach my daughter this now when she was young as opposed to when she was older and suffering because as women that’s something our mothers never tell us!
“Lintle, you will grow up some day, right now you are still a baby if you have such fantasies in your head. Men are shit and have always been. Get that straight!”
We were out of the hotel now and I had an idea where to look first. My husband was not a Florida Road kind of man so it had to be Musgrave. In Durban in all honesty it’s either Gateway or Musgrave because Pavilion is often overcrowded and am sure by now it was closed. Florida Road is for Jhb people who want to get free sex from Durban girls who think they have money. I also did not want to go there because I knew Lintle being this young would be attracted to it thanks to all the bright lights and might end up sneaking out to go partying.
I have been to Durban often enough so I know my way around. I had done a course at UKZN Medical School even and stayed a semester so this place was familiar. Maybe I should go to lower Umhlanga first I told myself. There are many restaurants there and it would make sense that my husband would not want to go too far. It was a good instinct. We went to lower Umhlanga. Finding parking was not that hard. I told Lintle to stay in the car as I walked out to look around. Most restaurants are on the same road so it was not too much work. He was not here! The Oyster Box is another favourite destination for rich cheating men with little girls so that was my next destination. He car was distinct, it was red and truth be told, there are not many red cars on the road. As soon as we entered the parking I saw the car, I am certain of it. I showed Lintle and she just shook her head.
We walked out together, my daughter and I and decided to check the bar and restaurant first. It was the most logical choice and the correct one. There he was sitting there drinking with her and laughing. She had her diary on the table! That’s how clearly I could see her!
“Mrs. Dlamini! I would be damned!”
Lintle said her jaw on the floor. I didn’t speak. It was Samantha, the politician’s wife that used to live next to us. My daughter had once warned me about her in front of my husband and turned around and said she was lying. Well if she had been then it meant she was not now. Because he had been accused once and been found innocent does not mean this could happen a second time. I was not going to let it slide!
“It’s creepy to follow him but let’s go! This would be fun though! When I told you about her I was joking! I really can’t believe that she is actually here and I am right!”
She said as she took off her earring and watch.
“Why are you taking those off?”
I asked her. She was not coming in with me. I doubt the bouncers would let her through in any case! Now that I was here I really was not sure how I was going to handle this. Would I go In all guys blazing and drag him out or just go sit next to them and say nothing. That would drive the message he had brought me all this way to do this to me? Really! Nah, he had the wrong woman and that I was going to show him and her. She knew he was married so for that she too would feel my wrath!
“Mum, we girls, I am going to help you beat her up! She is disrespecting us and we must teach her a lesson. This is not just a random woman but someone who knows he is married and actually knows you and us in person! This one we beat up!”
My daughter said making it clear that she had my back. Where are those self-righteous people now who say that when you are confronted with such a situation you must walk away? Where are they that say if a man cheats just get up and leave? Have they ever been in love? Have they ever been married? I don’t think so! You don’t just get up and leave! This is not playing house, this is really!
Sizwe looked like one of those people caught on the show Cheaters but the only difference is that I had no cameras and bouncers.
“What is this?”
I asked him! At first he was too stunned to talk! I can’t blame the lying cheating fool because he thought I would not have found him. Now I was here!
“You remember Samantha right?”
He asked me trying to sound as calm as possible. How could he be so calm at a time like this?
“I saw you get into the car with her! What are you doing with my husband Samantha?”
I asked her. I have heard that Zulu women don’t hesitate to fight for a man but I was not scared at this moment. The nerve of this woman!
“My daughter once said you had an affair with my husband and now you are back! You should have left when you had the chance but no, you had to make a come back!”
I said stepping forward. I was going to moer this woman right here in public. People were already. Starting to look our way,
“Nothabo you were not supposed to follow us here!”
He said to me but that was not what I wanted to hear. I wanted to know what he was doing with this bitch!
“Samantha show her what we are working on?”
He told the terrified woman. She took out a folder from out of her bag. It was written outside Sizwe and Nothabo. This clearly was a work meeting because who brings a folder to dinner but why so late! I felt so stupid. In. The folder she had a portfolio of wedding themes, Sizwe’s wedding, our wedding. I had even forgotten that we had agreed to renew our vows.
I did not even get a chance to say anything because out of nowhere. Lintle went past me, picked up a wine glass, pulled Samantha by her hair making her fall out her sit, legs up, exposing her in a way a woman should never be exposed,
“Stay away from my father you fucken bitch!”l
She said as she jumped on her. She started beating the woman up. My husband and I jumped to pull my little defender off just as security got to us.
“You brought her here? What is wrong with you?”
My husband asked me when we had order. Samantha stood up in shock and started packing her things to go. She was so humiliated.
“That’s what you get for sleeping with other people’s husbands! Your husband is a famous politician am going to the papers to expose you!l
My daughter screamed on. I told her to shut up and started to apologize to her but she was too scared.
“If you had not badged in and again shown your mistrust for me this would have gone totally different!”
He pulled up his chair that had fallen over and stood and looked at Samantha who was tears now.
“Samantha I am sorry, clearly my wife has a lot to work on. This wedding renewal is off!”
He said in a weak apology to be honest. He was so stunned andd dumbfound that he walked away. I was stunned. I was fucked. I was hurt.
“Run after him mum! Come on!”
Lintle egged me on. People were staring and that was embarrassing!
“Sizwe what was I supposed to think? Why did you have to meet her at night like this?”
I asked him. I was right too. Why all the cloak and dagger behavior. Anyone would have suspected! With the way things had been going between us lately sure I had every reason to suspect that he was replacing me. He stopped at the door, turned and said,
“She is leaving for Cape Town on the first flight tomorrow that’s why we had to meet today.”
“I am the one who forced her to come out, she did not even want! If I was having an affair I would not do it in your face like you did!”
He walked out and left.
“We kinda fucked up mum!”
Lintle said holding my hand as the tears ran down my cheeks!
Michael Nkululeko Maphoto
Dear Mike and readers
I am a young woman who is in her early 20’s and over the past decade of my life, I have managed to get myself into a dilemma.
It all started in my early teens, I fell in love with a guy who I thought was the best thing that ever happened to me, we had our ups and downs but we always worked it out. Let’s call him guy A. So ever since then with a lotta break ups and make ups me and guy A are still together, our families know about our relationship and they’re both supportive. The problem now is that me and him are always fighting about stupid things, I get so frustrated and irritated with him sometimes and the more time I spend with him then the more time I worry about building castles in the sand. Guy A was my first and he has never hurt me except for cheating on me a few times which he stopped as soon as I found out.
A few years later in my matric, I met guy B. Who was about 6 years older than me. Guy B and I easily hit it off, he’s the kinda guy I can talk to all day long and all night long and never run out of things to say and even though me and him have had an on and off relationship I still feel the very same way I do when I first met him. When I’m with guy B I reach this place of contentment, I even feel good about myself now the problem with guy B is that he also has been in a long term relationship and he got this lady pregnant. They have two kids now but I still can’t help myself. We have gone as far as talking about if I would be okay with being a second wife. This guy is what my friends reference to as a monster, he has broken my heart a lotta times for this woman that he’s been with over the past 6 years of my life but there’s just always this part of me that believes he loves me and cause I love him so much it’s hard to turn him away.
I am confused, I have a guy who would give me his whole world yet I’m considering being someone’s second, is it normal to feel this way? I know that this might sound stupid to most of the people here but I just don’t wanna make choices that I’ll regret.