Men do bad things against women because they genuinely believe they will not get caught and if they do get caught they will get away with it. I doubt when he beats up a woman or even rapes her he will be thinking that after this is jail so let me do it some more. Another thing they prey on is that women tend to forgive at some point. That is true. We have this weakness inside us that makes us usually break. The look on Mudenda’s face was priceless! He wanted to die. Immediately Meladi’s father stepped up in his defence and said it was not his fault he was defending his fiance. The white officer pointed out that there were two witnesses who would claim otherwise.
“Where you there sir when this happened?”
He asked him. He looked at him and responded,
“No sir I was not but…”
He was cut off as the question was readdressed to Tidimalo and my sister,
“Yes sir we were!”
He looked at her father and then said,
“So who do you think we should listen to, those who were there or those who were not?”
He asked him. He had must made this great powerful man look stupid and choke on his own power.
“Speak for yourself you stupid boy I can’t defend you the whole way!”
He said to Mudenda. This had not been part of my mission in life but when his father in law called him stupid I knew deep down he had just reached a turning point with his son in law. The respect was gone and nothing is harder to fix than this. I was on a roll now,
“You know him sir, remember when you found him hitting me at his house when I came to introduce the baby? Meladi is next! Abusive people never stop. You know it and I know it!”
I said. He stopped in his tracks. I had made a good point and I think he recognised that. Angrily Mudenda shouted,
“I am not abusive!”
But that anger just made everyone in the room believe me even more! Like I said I had not planned is.
“Do you want to see the bruises he caused today?”
I asked the father now milking it for all its worth.
“What if it’s self inflicted? I was not there so I can’t verify!”
Now he had moved from saying he had been defending his daughter to distancing himself from it. So quickly! Wow! I walked to him and showed him the bruises. I wish I was a bit lighter than this so that it can show even more but alas it is what it is.
“That is the man marrying your only daughter! He already abandoned a woman six months pregnant by simply upping and leaving! What kind of a man does that make him?”
I asked the father. I know if he was not listening to me I would have least planted that seed of doubt.
“Now I have to take him to maintenance court just to make my child have food!”
I said angrily. That triggered something in me, if I got him arrested I might have a problem of getting maintenance. When you have a child and are a single mother you always have to think of the bigger picture. A man in jail often loses his job and when he comes out chances of getting a new one a slim at best. Oh hell no, he was not escaping like that!
“No its fine, I will not press charges officer. I am not a vengeful person. It could mess up his career!”
With that I walked out and left. Tidimalo and my sister followed suit. When we were outside my sister asked me why I had changed my mind. Even Tidimalo could not understand because I had been that close to getting my revenge. What they don’t get is that I had done more damage than him sleeping in a cell ever will. I had created that element of doubt. Don’t kid yourself doubt is possibly the most powerful negative force that can ever follow you around. Nothing beats it. Now he will never be happy especially if the inlaws did not trust him. They will ask their daughter to leave him and it will create tension forever. I was not ashamed nor did I feel bad about what I had done. I never started off to be a mean baby mama but he had made this person. In his head by me not pressing charges it will be like either I am weak or I have forgiven him. Reality is, the suffering was like slow poison and it was coming.
Amo was crying now so I sat with him and held him closely. My sister said her man was coming over later so she wanted to know if she should tell mom about her engagement. Why would she even ask that? Is that not a good thing? Tidimalo congratulated her and started sing wedding songs like,
“Makoti ke de nako, wa jika jika…”
Which made my sister blush and we all laughed. All was well with the world. When we got home I finished up cleaning the couch. Tidimalo left just as my mother arrived.
“That boy is always running away when I get here!”
She said as soon as she entered. It’s true what she was saying though, Tidimalo always left when she was in the house but I doubt it was because he was running. That was just about the only nice thing she said though! Not that it was nice but oh well!
She immediately started complaining at how dirty the house was! She complained about everything. I don’t know how mothers do it but many girls can tell you that you can clean the house and your mother will come and tell you that it’s dirty. She will find things you never could have imagined and show you to prove a point.The house as far as I was concerned had no speck of dust in it. The only section that could have been messy was the kitchen because my sister was using it. In the mood she was in there was no way I was going to bring up all the drama that had transpired in her absence. She had a way of making things worse, Funny thing she never actually looked at the couch that I was the most worried about. She was focused on the floor but wait till she sees it! There will be hell to pay
She went into her bedroom complaining then called me to bring her a feather duster! Imagine! When I brought it she showed me a spider and asked me why we had not killed it!
I told her it had not been there before but she said I was lying. I asked why kill it with a feather duster of all things we should just spray it with Doom! She went beserk and told me that I don’t appreciate how expensive things are! The feather duster was free and did not finish yet I was saying use something she will have to buy and replace. She swung at the spider but it moved. She then tried to stab the damn the damn thing but it fell of the ceiling and ran under the bed. We both jumped in fright funny enough. It was hard to keep a straight face with all that was going on. My mother was not too pleased. The spider was not getting away with its life because she bent over to look under the bed for it but only a fool would not realize that by now it. Was good but tell my mother that. In two seconds she was back out and this time she was holding something. My jaw dropped!
“What is this?”
She asked. She was holding a used condom wrap (not the actually used condom) but in my head I could hear R Kelly in Trapped in A Closet sing in horror,
“Oh my God a rubber…rubber!”
My mother turned all colours in anger!
Michael Nkululeko Maphoto (fb)
I have a problem and I am not sure how to address it. My boyfriend is so stingy. We have been dating for three years and generally he is a good boyfriend. We don’t go for movies unless I pay, lunch and outings I pay too. Two months ago my friend was having a wedding and he made me pay him for fuel and tollgates to Polokwane and back from Jhb. He works and earns more than me even when you take out the car and insurance installment. Help me understand this man please! I have had three birthdays with him and all 3 he gave me a r750 voucher from either a mall or shop. I make my own money but I spend it on him. He is at my flat every weekend and does not contribute to much. I have complained to him about this but he does not change.
Should I break up with him even thought I love him and he loves me!