It’s funny really, when a woman is not in your situation she tends to have the loudest opinions. So many women and I believe I can say as many as 80 % have slept with an ex let alone a baby daddy. All these women because they regret that decision and call it a moment of weakness will be the first to laugh at you and tell you, another woman how weak you are. A real honest woman will tell you that when you have loved someone, even if you hate them at some point, that familiarity, that bond never fully goes away. It’s only when he hurt you really badly that you walk away saying he is evil, he is a dog, all those names we call them to make ourselves feel better that we think we have moved on. Why do you think men are so threatened by you attending an event where you ex is? It’s for that reason. White people call it closure black people call it disgusting or weak or whatever people think of me sitting in Mudenda’s car at this moment. This man hurt me, I am not stupid, I will never forget that but I had something for him and his girlfriend that would wound her forever and that’s her constant fear that she will always have to worry about me.
“Listen, Meladi please, it’s not what you think at all. I was just doing it to try recover my thesis!”
He said in his desperation but she was not buying it and the silence in the car made it such that I could hear everything she was saying,
“You lying dog! You were going to fuck her and then come home and fuck me!”
“How could you Mudenda? I am the mother of your unborn child!”
I couldn’t help it; she gave me an opening so I shouted loudly enough for her to hear,
“So am I!”
And girl oh girl did she go ballistic! She was angry! It’s a miracle I swear God is great that she didn’t give birth right there and then. It was like I had punched her in the stomach, ok sorry that’s mean to say of a pregnant woman but oh well it was!
“How can you let her talk to me like that? Get her out of your car Mudenda! Get her out!”
His phone made that battery dying sound and it switched off! Now ladies, we all know that if a guy tells us that his battery died it’s tantamount to him saying he is fucking someone else! I am not lying! Out of all the batteries in the world, in our minds, why yours? Why didn’t you charge it?
“Can I use your phone?”
Lol I swear I felt like putting on that Medea accent and say,
“Boy you must have lost your mind!”
But I held it within and told him it would only make it worse. I was right too! Imagine him calling you with his mistresses’ phone! Aowa he would have grown balls of steel should he ever do that to you. It’s not even disrespectful it’s just suicide!
“But I need to talk to her!”
“Do you want her to dump you?”
I asked him. He said no and I was not even hurt. I did not want him dumped either. That would be too easy and I won’t have someone to torment. He looked at me and I think we had made a break through. He sighed.
“I am sorry I lied but I have to go. She drives me crazy that girl. She runs to her father every second minute and oh no, he doesn’t know when to chill, he will call and want to advise me! I am tired!”
He said hitting his head on his staring. Did this guy really want to make hear his problems with his girlfriend? Was he for real. He thought I had forgotten that that he said he was here to fuck me because of his thesis!
“If you go now you are damned if you do and damned if you don’t. Either way you are in trouble! I am horny now not later so make up your mind!”
I said to him. He was a bit confused but I wasn’t. I knew what I was doing. Men! Do you know why women have more power than men when it comes to sex? Simple, because 99percent of the time a man can’t say no to you when you come on to him. It’s as simple as that. With women we get to reject these bastards for as long as we want at any time we want. Most girls obviously hide behind,
“If I initiate sex I am a whore!”
Like we live in the 1930s but that’s them and their backward oppressed minds! If you can’t ask a man in 2015 when then can you ask him out? When you are in your fifties? We oppress ourselves shem! I was going to shag him and I knew exactly what I was doing.
“You still want to have sex?”
He asked me curiously!
I had been horny for a while now and hadn’t been laid in six months so my answer was yes. Why should I be ashamed of wanting what I wanted? He was wearing tight jeans meaning they had to come off and I was wearing the skirt I had worn to the interview so I had to hike it up. I had already thought this through. I asked him if he had a condom and joked that the last time he didn’t have one we made a baby. It was an uncomfortable laugh he let out. He had one so we agreed to go to the back seat.
When we kissed there was no electricity but I didn’t mind. He was just hungry and was all over me. I pulled up my skirt and took off my panties. The man was practically drooling. The way men love sex though? It’s like the one thing that gets them happy almost always. His dick, it was bigger than I remember was already standing at full attention. What a guy!!! He put on his condom! I noticed the car keys were still in the ignition and I told him that it was not safe. I reached over, my naked ass in his face turning him on even more and pulled them out.
His jeans were fully off now and on my side of the car as though they were a pillow. Actually he said that. Lol how considerate. I told him that it’s only fair I take off my skirt too but I had to stand up as I was not as flexible as him. The glee on his face was priceless. I opened the door on my side and stepped out. I laughed at him as he was slowly stroking his dick maybe to keep it hard I don’t know.
I grabbed his jeans, and his keys and I banged the door shut!
“What are you doing?”
He shouted panicking!
“You think I am some whore you going to fuck for a thesis!”
I said to him showing him his keys!
“Get back here right now, I am warning you!”
He screamed! This man was not taking me seriously! Who the fuck did he thing he was!
“Uyangxhaphela wena ..uhambe ubhebha wonke amagolo ungenza islima nxxxxxxx. ….hambofa ungjwayel amasimba wena! Voetsek!”
I shouted as I walked away. I had his keys, his pants and his underwear and his phone was flat!
*PS The Zulu part please ask Zulus to translate because lol its too deep for me I am a Christian!
Michael Nkululeko Maphoto (fb)
Thanx a lot for your blog. I’m so hooked, its not funny.
Now to my letter… I’m originally from Jhb but I stay in Cape Town it used to be because of work but now its mainly because of my relationship. I’m 7months pregnant and its been the best experience. Despite the fact that I lost my job at 3months. My boyfriend however has been the best thing in my life from day 1 and the pregnancy didn’t change him. He’s what other girls consider a ‘dream man’ and we have a perfect relationship. He’s been so supportive and he’s been there for me both emotionally and financially. Besides that I’m used to my independency but I haven’t felt the void of not having a salary and I know our child will be well taken care of. Lately though we’ve been having problems. There’s this girl they have a history, they briefly dated way before we met but because of distance it didn’t work out. She is from Jhb (I know hey my boyfriend and Jhb girls) while he is in Cape Town obviously. However she recently reappeared from whatever hole she was in and made contact with him and he seems to like it. We had a fight about it and he promised he wouldn’t carry on with it. He did so and life went back to normal so I thought. He went to Jhb (for work related purposes) 2 weeks ago and he contacted her and by evidence they were planning on meeting until I got sick and he had to cut his trip short and return to Cape Town. My boyfriend is clumsy, I don’t know if he’s stupid or what but he never deletes his msgs or conversations so me being a woman who occasionally checks his phone as they say wayisusa uzoyimela. We had another fight but he promised they didn’t meet and apologised, I let it go and he blocked her. This morning I go through his phone again and noticed that he had unblocked her and they were speaking again. Not only did I feel deceived but I don’t think I want to be with him anymore because clearly this girl means something to him. I have to move back home to have the baby and he decided he’s gonna transfer to Jhb so we can still be together (this was decided way before this girl reappeared). I know its a big decision for him and I have no doubt that he loves me but I don’t trust him. I feel like I’m just waiting to be cheated on and especially when we get to Jhb where this girl is. Please advice me on what to do. I have the choice of having the baby here in Cape Town and making it work with him but won’t that be running away from what’s waiting to happen?!
Sorry for the long essay 🙂
Soon to be mommy!