If you are a teenager now then you will understand this, you are always one step ahead of your parents. They might have the money in the house but that’s all they know. When it comes to knowing all the latest everything, they know more than us by a long distance. Parents have been outwitted by their children in history and that has not changed today. These brats seem to torture us and our naivity for the fun of it. Nelisa could have started with mentioning that fact at the very beginning but she had chosen not to. Part of me felt as though she had been trying to protect my daughter but then again it makes you question the logic of these young ones. How do you protect a wrong thing and this exactly what she was doing? I felt like pulling my hair out because I was just getting more and more terrified of my child. She was so cunning and under handed. It now seemed as though even when I thought things were fine i was fooling myself! She had me good. I looked at Nelisa and I just felt stupid. That feeling of having egg on your face is something you can never get over. I stood there and just stared at her. Had I heard correctly. I saw my husband look down as though embarrassed for me and I felt like just punching him. I had been outplayed by a teenager! Imagine! Dr. Makgofa out smarted by a baby. My husband realizing that the moment had really gotten tense took charge and asked,
“Why didn’t you call us the moment she called you? You could see it was late and something was wrong but you chose to put both you and her at risk by asking a person you hardly know for a lift! This is not Bloemfontein! This is Jhb it’s dangerous Nelisa!”
My husband asked her but she looked at him with a very bewildered look.
“I don’t understand really! Would you rather some other stranger had brought her home! She did not call you for the very same reason she snuck out in the first place. You are her parents so she will never call you.”
She explained to my husband which again just made us look more and more like naïve parents. It’s not that we were not acknowledging her coming in to save the day but in all honesty things could have gotten worse for the both of them. It’s the reality of this wretched city we call Jhb.
“I am also starting to think that she is more in trouble than I am and she did not do anything.”
Lintle finally said opening her mine. She did not even sound remorseful for it. It was like it was all a game. How do you even think you can punish someone like that? Did she want to get caught? It didn’t make sense if she had taken all these steps to sneak out in the first place!
“My ride is gone, can you please drop me off!”
Nelisa said snapping me out of it. She sounded annoyed! This girl had serious attitude and by the looks of it she was not trying to hide it.
“Nelisa I think you should sleep wuth Lintle tonight. It’s too late to drive home in any case.”
I said calmly.m she looked at me as though I had just kissed Blade Nzimande with shock and disgust! I think I had earned that though.
“You don’t have to pretend to be nice. You said you don’t want me in your house so why would I sleep here? I was only trying to help and you treat me like that! I knew this was too good to be true!”
She said. She folded her arms the very same way Lintle does it. It’s like they really were sisters.
“I am sorry Nelisa I thought you played a role in this!”
I said calmly.
“Whom I date is none of your concern! You have no idea why I am in Jhb and I am sorry I thought you wouldn’t judge because you have your hands full. He is my boyfriend until I say he is not!”
I was not prepared for this argument now. By virtue of that alone I should be throwing her out but I could not. I had already said stay.
“We not doing that now but for today, for now, go upstairs we will talk tomorrow!”
Nelisa went upstairs grumpily. There really was something dark and scary about her I just could not place it. My husband and I sat on the couch and I could not help it but break down and cry. Men traditionally have never understood a woman’s tears but at this moment I am certain my husband knew why.
“What are we going to do now?”
I asked him.
“Every attempt I make with her she makes life more difficult!”
I told him. I was actually quite broken. Imagine! My daughter had brought me down within a week!
“I want you to do something! Stop playing the good pparent with her! Our daughter needs help before its too late. If you don’t stop this now this family will break apart!”
I told him. He responded by asking me what exactly I expected him to do. I told him I don’t care but tomorrow he must do something and must not ask me stupid questions.
“Teenagers are like this! It’s a stage and she will get over it! Just give it time!”
Did he really say that? Did he? I can’t believe this man. I took my pillow and went to sleep downstairs. I don’t like idiots and right now he was being an idiot! It’s a good thing he did not follow me downstairs. I was off the following day meaning it would give me time to think. In the morning when I woke up my husband was gone but the girls were upstairs. I did not talk to them even when I heard them talking upstairs. I know Lintle was waiting for a confrontation but it was not going to come. She wanted to be an adult then let her have adult responsibilities.
I had not gotten a chance to ask my husband where he had gone but he too needed a talking to. I had told him to do something about this situation so for his sake I pray he had listened. I can’t justify him slacking off. Isn’t that the man’s job to fix problems which the wife can’t solve. That’s why it’s called team work so it was his turn. I wanted to go see the Private Investigator though. It was very important now for the sake of my sanity. I wanted to make him stop. He was creating too much mistrust in my family. What a terrible idea!
I got ready for my appointment with him and as I was leaving in entered my husband. I asked him where he was and he retorted,
“I was doing something!l
Ok that was unnecessary rudeness but I let it slip and asked him what he had done.
“I have a friend that I have spoken to! He is a magistrate in the child’s court and he has agreed to put Lintle in Boys and Girls Town! I have already signed the papers so there is no turning back!”
He said with a stern but very sad look on his face!
Oh ok at least that was an option. See, some people needed motivation to think. I hugged him and I told him I had errands and I left the house. However, as soon as I entered the car and it hit me hard.
Isn’t Girls and Boys Town almost like a juvenile detention centre!
That’s like a prison!
Michael Nkululeko Maphoto (fb)
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I am a man in an abusive marriage. My wife and I have been married for seven years. When we started dating she was sweet kind and charming. Everyone loved and they still do. After we got married she changed firstly she demands to go through my phone every few days as though a random inspection. I have nothing to hide. When she does go through it and finds nothing she gets angry and says I deleted the evidence, we fight. We were once in the mall and we bumped into an ex female colleague who was with her husband. She was now working in a different province and had been in my unit. We greeted and exchanged pleasantries. My wife was sweet and smiled at them. The moment they left she caused a scene where she even punched me in the parking lot. Her argument was we were disrespectful to say hello in the first place. Once I was watching TV and she had disagreement with someone from church. She threw a glass at me and I had to get stitches. I went to the police and people don’t know how humbling it is when a policeman looks at you like you are crazy. They came to the house and spoke to her. When they left she laughed at me saying that I needed other men to speak on my behalf. I am a big guy make no mistake about it and if I beat up that woman I will kill her. I choose not to because I fell in love with her head first. I know I sound cliché but men are often accused of doing nonsense to their wives and I am not one of them. Everyone who knows her genuinely thinks she is the warmest kindest person they know. We have no kids, not because I don’t want them but because she is building her career! It’s been seven years of marriage for heavens sake. I don’t know what to do friends I am stuck. We are married in community of property (50\50) but she has the higher salary as she has a higher post in the SAPS. Yes she has a gun and friends with guns. She is university educated and like I said she is so nice they all worship her.
I am hurt and I am broken. Brothers and sisters I want to save my marriage because my vows mean something to me but I am tired of sleeping with one eye open.