Let’s be honest, nowadays kids stay at home way longer than they should. Even now I use the term ‘kids’ loosely as there was a time when a man at the age of 30 could not still live with his parents. It was just unheard of for a man that old to live with his mother. It worked because women could not find that morally acceptable but nowadays us women we don’t care about that! Hell we can even move into his parents house, set up in the back room and have kids there it’s fine! With women it’s even worse, we are protected like an endangered species, whatever happens from fighting with our live in boyfriends to losing our job we all move back home. You ask yourself why leave in the first place if home can be forever. Maybe it’s this modern thing in which sons now can buy alcohol to drink with their father’s even before they have found their own place. Then there is the expense, what kind of nonsense is it that in Johannesburg rent in any half decent place is r8000 for a two bedroom! I live in North Riding so I will not speak for Soweto but here staying at home is the only option we have to be economically viable. My mother was definitely making a bad mistake. She could not throw out my sister like this, hell no! Besides, if I was starting work I needed someone to take care of Amo! We could hardly afford a nanny and to be honest my sister was really good with him.
“I hope you had heard me clearly! Pack your things and go! You are too much for me I cannot handle! Every time something good happens in this house you have to find a bad thing to trump that! If this is how I raised you then I failed!”
“But mom where do you expect me to go! I was just joking with her I didn’t mean it like that!”
My sister protested!
“You joke with me dying? That’s funny to you?”
My mother asked her! Ok my sisters choice of words in this case had been rather poor! I jumped in front of my mother and begged her not to do this! She had made her point! I think this was now taking it too far but she was not done,
“You need to make a decision right now, next year you either go for nursing school or I can guarantee you that you will be selling your body after I chase you out!”
Eh! Awkward! My mother has a sharp tongue. She can shout obscenities at you in vernacular you could never expect a grown woman to say. I once asked how she comes up with such things and she said as a nurse she gets to meet people from all walks of life and fights normally break out between visiting relatives. Whenever someone is sick there will always be someone who will be unlucky enough to accused of witchcraft so you can imagine!
“But mum I don’t want to be a nurse! No one does that anymore! It’s such a dirty job and… ”
My mother stood up and went towards her in such a manner I thought she was going to hit her! She was so insulted and frankly speaking so was I.
“Nursing puts food on your table you ungrateful child! I don’t know what I was thinking when I made you! Ngaze ngadlala ngosuku engathola wena ngalo! What a waste! I would have been better off if I had gone drinking instead!”
She said. She was so furious. My sister le yena does not know how to calm down a situation. As for my mothers words, only Jesus can intervene. How can you call your own child a wasted night!?
“You will do nursing and I will not pay for anything else but nursing! If you refuse you will go find a place to stay and you are cut off from this nurse! And don’t get this wrong, if you do not finish it this time is the last time! Go sell drugs at Jeppe Hostel!”
My sister is frustrating. She is that girl who registers for a course every year then quits. In her she has done everything from Bcom to IT, Human Resource you name it. All of which she did not finish! I therefore kind of had an idea why my mother was being so stern. The problem with my mother though was that she had so many moods and could send you missed signals. I know this because there are times she loved Tidimalo for all he was doing for me then in the same breathe she disliked him so much. She was not consistent. My sister had a tendency of trying to kill herself and I wondered if my mother had forgotten that. I really had to calm the situation down but I did not know how.
My mother walked out and went to the bedroom! She closed her door behind her leaving me standing with my sister.
“I really was just joking!”
My sister said to me but I just looked at her, took my baby and walked out! She was too much! As soon as I got a call from a number I didn’t know, it was a girl,
“Hi, It’s Thandeka, Thandeka Mkhize from the braai, how is your mom doing?”
She asked me. That was so sweet of her. I doubt I would have done that. I told her she was going to be fine and she said she was going to pray for her! I put my phone down and prepared Amo for bed! When I got back to it, I had a text message from Tidimalo. I had almost missed it. At least I will sleep with a smile knowing that the people that support me where still there. I will deal with my mom and sister tomorrow and Amo was not in one of his crying phases.
“I won’t be coming to see you any more. There is too much happening with you right now and what I want from you, from us, I don’t think we will achieve! I am hurting myself too much by investing like this!”
I was not sure what had just happened…
Michael Nkululeko Maphoto (fb)
Hello mike and team
I’m a 26 year old lady. I was dating a 30 year old married guy for a year and 4 months. He used to be my boss when it all started and knew his wife as we all work in the same centre. When it started he told me that it won’t be serious as he has a wife but a few months he started telling me how he has fallen for me. It was supposed to be something temporary but ended catching feelings and it became hard to let go. Our relationship was not bases on money or sex.the guy really made me happy. About 3 weeks ago I decided to end the relationship because I felt i need to find my own man. Problem is he doesnt want to let go, and its a problem because he always comes to my work place. He calls to check up on me wants to us to continue with our relationship. His wife already suspects that something is going on between us. She went through his phone and luckily he always remembers to clear our chat history but she saw a call log that he always calls me. He obviously told her that nothing is going on and we agreed that if she asks me i tell her the same thing but she never asked me not sure if it was due to lack of evidence or what. She works next door to me and he works 2 floors up. The guy won’t stop and because I had fallen for him its very difficult for me move on when I see him almost everyday.