It’s weird really, your parents can absolutely despise you for giving birth like I had but 99% of the time your baby is loved as though it is their own. They will take him to church, shopping, the works but you are treated as though you are an infectious disease. My mother still barely spoke to me but my baby was spoilt rotten. Some of the things he had were quite unnecessary and he was too young for. She had bought books on parenting and so on all of which were for her to read not me. I did not complain though because as long as I kept her happy she would not shout at me. On the days she was off the baby slept with her and it was not even a question. Ironically she faced stiff competition for the babies attention with Judith. My sister bare went out anymore, had even gained a bit of weight just to emphasise how much of a change Amo had brought. When we drove into our driveway my mothers car was already home. I could feel my heart sink even before Judith told me to brace myself. I knew what was about to happen next. As soon as I came out of the car my mother came outside! Needless to say my mother was so angry at me!
“What is wrong with you? Did it strike you for one moment that they could take Amo away fromm you? Do you think we would have had the money to fight them in court?”
She shouted. She actually had genuine tears in her eyes. I won’t lie the though did not cross my mind at all. She had a point too. In a country where justice is bought I could lose a case just like that.
“Mum I can explain…”
I started to protest but I know my mother. Once she starts there is no stopping her. What’s worse was we were outside meaning anyone could hear. She told me it was because of irresponsible behavior like this that made me a mother when I only had a matric certificate in my life. That hit home! Judith had to calm her down by reminding her that Amogelang was back with us so there was nothing to be angry about. She walked past her with the Moses Basket of which my mother followed her immediately already playing with her grandson. I actually sat down on the driveway leaning on the car. I felt like I was such a loser. My mother was right and I know in future I will tell myself that I would have not had it any other way but for now, at this moment, I had let myself down by having a baby. It’s not easy. I am not a fighting person but look at me now. Mudenda was in jail because of me, I had blood stains on me and my mother had not even noticed that.
I walked into the house and my mother just looked at me. I think she was expecting an explanation on the blood but Judith came to my rescue.
“Come I clean that up,”
She said calmly. I followed her to the bathroom where she washed the wound and closed it. I took off my clothes and but them in the washer. I was also only then I realized that I also had a bruise on my elbow. Mudenda! I sighed. God will remember this day.
My mother was tired though meaning she went to bed early. I was left with Amogelang and Judith. We watched tv and took turns holding him. My phone was on silent but am certain I had a few missed calls on it. I did not want to check them because I knew it would just frustrate me even more. Around eleven Judith said her boyfriend was coming! I just rolled my eyes in my head and said here we go again! Judith was an expert at one thing, getting all the bad guys she could find from the beaters to the ex cons. She attracted them like no other woman I know. It always ended up bad and the problem was no one could tell her what to do. The moment you did she would disappear. We lived in an estate so it was easy for her to slip out with my mother not noticing. When he was outside, ok fine, by the neighbours gate she told me we must both come out because she wanted me to meet him. Previously I would have said no but with the amount of help she had given me with my baby I could not refuse her. Amo was sleeping now, peacefully too meaning when I came back I will catch a few hours sleep before he had to nurse. I went outside and there was a car parked I could not identify. I am not that good with cars but I can safely say it was white. A guy and girl came out of the car! What now? Was she being confronted for dating someone else’s man? I would not put it past her.
He said with a smile on his face. I breathed a sigh of relief. They hugged and kissed (baby kiss) and he looked at me,
“You must be Faith! Pleasure to finally meet you!”
Please this guy spoke in proper “twang” English and was was wearing a cardigan around his shoulders. I greeted him back.
“Babe this is my little sister Onikho”
He said turning to the girl. I guess I had been to quick to panic. He sounded very decent as we both greeted her. I could not stay though. Amo started crying and I excused myself and went in. As soon as I picked him up he fell asleep. I picked my phone to check my messages and I only had one.
“You know I extended you an olive branch and you rejected it by that stunt you pulled at the police. Now you must suffer! How can you say you ever loved him if you do that now look they beat him up in jail? Fuck off!”
That was from Meladi. I paused for a second.
Michael Nkululeko Maphoto
Thanks for such a wonderful blog. Which I can’t live without. Ok I need help here I dated this guy while was still in tertiary. The guy didn’t work and was not educated but I loved him, as time went by I realized that there was no future for us Bcz I earned more than him and he was not able to provide in any way. Ok we separated and I meet my Fiance were engaged but the love I had for the ex never surpassed. We never had contact until recently he moved close to my parents house and we mainten contact. I tried so hard to keep this guy out of my mind and heart but it seems impossible but I never cheated with him on my fiance. I’ve been loyal to him. Recently I found out that my fiancee is cheating on me with his baby mama, and we have a 9months old son. I decided to break up the engagement. Now he has moved out of the house to the baby mama. And im hurting but if that’s what he want I cannot fight him. I also went back to my parents house where I see my ex often. Now my dilemma is the guy has moved on, has a girlfriend but want us to give it a try again. As much as I love this guy it doesn’t sit well with me that he has a girlfriend and he will be cheating on her with me. Pls help Jackzorro and the family