Memoirs – Chapter One Hundred and Nineteen

Posted on Posted in Memoirs of a Tired Black Man

What are the chances of a husband and wife sitting at the breakfast table and one says “I want a divorce” and the other says “Okay, let’s do it!” those chances are slim to none. First comes the tears then the anger then the denial that this is actually happening then to that person who the divorce has been asked of, that overwhelming feeling of failure. Yes it comes across as you failed on that one very simple and basic thing that is called to love another person and make them love you back. They do say to love another person is to see the face of God and if that’s true then your face clearly is that of the devil since he did not even see it. Note I said he because when a man asks for divorce especially in African culture it really is a slap on the face. It’s a statement like no other and getting back up from that insult is often easier said than done. With divorce usually, one person will initiate and the other will resist, simple mathematics I suppose hence I was not the least bit surprised that Asthandile would fight back. Her cash cow was gone but this was not even about money. She was not the girl I thought I met in high school, loved so much that one day I married her. No, she was evil, manipulative and downright dangerous. I had reached a point were I was scared to sleep in my home because she could burn in my home.

“Mxolisi stop let’s talk about this please! Ndiyaxolisa, mna nomyeni wam wam sizokwenza yonke into osicelayo uba masiyenze”

I cannot remember the last time my wife called me her husband but in short she had just asked me not leave her. I stopped at the stairs for a brief moment and I walked up the stairs. She sat there crying on the stairs. I expected her to go through a few phases but I did not care. I walked upstairs, took a small bag and started packing. I needed clothes more than anything. I hate shopping. I packed as much as I could then I looked at my bed one last time. Her side, the one that had been slept in was still undone. My side was neatly done. As no one had slept in it. I was about to walk out of the bedroom when Zimasa walked in and said,

“We missed you yesterday. Sisi Thandi cried all night and Ezile and I had to watch over her. Is everything alright?”

She asked me then she came from behind me and saw the bag.

“Where are you going?”

She asked me. I did not have words for her. She was just a child and she would never understand.

“It’s not my place but please do not do this. Please I am begging you. She is not a bad person she just needs your attention!”

She begged me on behalf of Asthandile. Maybe she was right maybe she was wrong but the fact remained, I was done. I walked past year without shame or sorrow then I stopped,

“I will send you my forwarding details,”

And went out. She was crying too. Divorce hurts so many people but I was not looking back. When I got to the bottom of the stairs I remember I had one question to ask Asthandile,

“How did you know about Lindiwe and me?”

She did not look up and I actually thought she would ignore but she whispered,

“You forget when you were in Pretoria my sister came too see you! I have always known about your other women Mxolisi, I am not a fool. I don’t get how you get to walk out of our marriage for me committing the same crime I did I really don’t. We can work this through!”

Well said but it was done. I walked out of the house, into my car and I drove out. I was not going to Khanyi’s house, I had decided on a longer trip.

I was on my way home to Mdantsane! I wanted time away from everything but I also wanted to make sure that where ever Lindiwe was to be buried I was going to be there. It’s so weird that much as I never fell in love with her or anything funny like that I could not help but wonder what could have been. For one we were having a baby together something which I cherish very much. I don’t believe in fatherless kids and much as Lindiwe had said I could choose not to play a part in her life that was never ever going to happen.

I had two missions for Mdantsane, one, I was going to see my parents and tell them I was leaving Asthandile then secondly, the tricky one, I was going to tell her obnoxious parents that I was bringing back their daughter where I found her. This time they can find her the rich husband they had always wanted for her.

I had driven for about two hours when I realized that this woman never loved me. We did not have many happy moments actually in this marriage. Yes before all this we hardly fought but I can’t truly say without conviction that we were happy. Content yes but happy I strongly doubted. The thought just made me feel stupid really. My phone was connected to to the car so when Dalu phoned it stopped the music that was playing. I answered and he said,

“How are you holding up?”

I told him I was fine as can be expected but was driving to Mdantsane. I explained to him that things were just not good I needed to breathe. I also told him that I had told Asthandile that I was going to divorce her. He listened attentively as though he understood where I was coming from which is why he caught me by surprise when he said,

“You have to turn back immediately because it is going to look suspicious?”

What the hell was he talking about now? I was confused as I think I have always been!

“What is going to look suspicious?”

Dalu kept quite for a moment.

“We pulled strings with the police and Andre was allowed to do a quick look over of the car. Someone cut Lindiwe’s brakes. When police figure this out they will look at her last movements!”

He warned.

No this was a joke come on now. It can’t be…

*****The End*****

@dairyofazulugirl
Mikeatdiary
Michael Nkululeko Maphoto
Mike@diaryofazulugirl.co.za

Hi Mike

I am a 21 year old female and for the past 3 years I was in a relationship with my high school sweetheart. that relationship was so wonderful during our first 18 months but after that when he went to university, he changed and would break up with me over very small and insignificant issues like me asking him why he keeps on breaking up with him or him being angry at me for not replying his text within 10 minutes of receiving it. He broke up with me more times than i can remember and each time i would go on my knees begging him to stay with me. I eventually went to the same university with him but things were never the same again and i suspect that during the time he kept breaking up with me, he was cheating. i have no proof though. now last month i noticed that i do not have feelings for him anymore because of what had happened and i broke u with him. since then he keeps on begging me to stay and going on his knees asking me to get back together with him. i don’t think i love him anymore but it saddens me to see him reduced to this state. does this person really love me or he just wants me to take him back? would this relationship ever work? Please help me…

Hurt and Confused

39 thoughts on “Memoirs – Chapter One Hundred and Nineteen

  1. Hmmmmmm I knew there was a story behind all these mysterious events… Lindiwe was killed! PERIOD!!!!

    Mike u are brilliant brother… not to be rude or anything but where is Nelosa ( Confessions) last time I checked she was going to write her finals, did she pass Mike? Is she at Varisty, Technikon or perhaps a cashier @ Spar???

    QnA : Don’t waste your time sisi, a Donkey never has a small dick. So what will change him now? You deserve better! !

  2. WOW I have enjoyed reading the Memories today. Weldone Mike. I really admire your work. Salute!!! Eish sometimes I wish was watching it not reading it.. too much emotions need to be watched. Asithandile kodwa umfazi onjani mara!!!

  3. thanks Rre Maphoto.
    Mtho shud give Dalu the sms sent by his wife and let her her go to jail for a long tym, shortcut to divorce.
    she will get alawyer with money she “stole” from their joint acc.

    q&a – my dear u are still young both of u, he still experimenting with life.
    -stoop kneeling for him he’s not your hubby, only to God u may kneel down and utata wakho.
    what comes around goes around let him cry, kneel and do whatever but dont take him back he’s stupid.

    with love from Nongo @BW

  4. I thought as much, Asthandile ke moloiloi. Sis man! As for the Q and A: what’s the use in even thinking about it. U just said u don’t love him. Keep walking.Don’t look back. Mayb he just wants u to take him back so he can brake it off with u himself.

  5. Now that was one sorry drive, those flashbacks and thoughts of failed relations, ya neh! Thanks Mikeesto, sad for days for Mxo and what if’s.

    Dear 21 year old : begging a spouse is sometimes an occurrence in relationships, it means you care deeply and don’t want to lose the other person. Usually it happens when one has wronged the other, or perhaps where one just simply can’t imagine living without the other, no matter how much of a loser the other might be.

    In this case, your ‘EX’is a Loser, he realises his stupidity and seeks to reconcile the situation so he can take charge again. The minute you dumped him, you became instantaneously Hot and hard to resist. That’s because he did all the dumping and you did all the begging. Its all reversed now, but don’t take him back.

    Let that thing go, it didn’t value You then, it won’t start now. Khaba lenja to the curb coz if you gonna take him back coz you feel sorry for him, you might as well start sleeping with a zombie.

    Jackzorro

  6. Thanks Mike, mmmhh so sad to hear about Lindiwe though. Khanyi and Asthandile are cruel bakithi! Can they get what is coming to them like today, and not wait for years for the truth to surface and justice be served NOW!
    @ Josh: a donkey ….what!!!! Kwaaaaaaaks
    A to Q: you say you don’t love him anymore – right? Then keep walking, stop worrying yourself about whether he is crying or laughing. Move on…

  7. i do not agree with the above comments, however, i am of the view that you must give him a tounge lash and forgive him, afterall, everyone deserve a second chance in life. remeber you did all the begging and he forgave you probably because he still loved you and when it is his turn to do the begging you are turning away from him?

  8. Really Asthandile seems like she’s the suspect her but I strongly believe that she had a lot to loose rather than gain in killing Lindiwe as compared to her ‘friend’ Khanyi who is on the half way line of inheriting a guy who’s a lawyer and who does not have a child I think that’s the reason why Khanyi is being so kind and playing the knight in shining armor because she does not want any fingers pointed at her

  9. Hi Mike

    When is Mxo going to use the cameras he installed at his house to catch police that were blackmailing him. I am sure they is a lot that he can use from the footages and he might also see himself having his way with Zamisa and her friend.

  10. Not suprised at all. Asithandile and Khanyi are no good. Khanyi pretended to be scared when she saw the sms from Asithandile yet she would not reveal to Mxolisi what other secrets she has. These two are in cohoots. They killed Lindiwe coz she had the one thing they both didn’t have, Mxolisi’s baby cause I for one do not believe Asithandile is carrying Mxolisi’s child.
    Making up our own theories really fuels the excitement of reading this blog, it proves you are a good writer Mike.

    Hurt and confused you can forgive a person but it doesn’t mean it will bring back the feelings you once have for them. If you don’t love him anymore, it would be really sad for you to take him back because of pity. Personally I think he is just selfish, now that you in the same university, he doesn’t want any other guy to have a relationship with you.

  11. Hi 21 Years, I’ve been there lol. With my very 1st bf, nigger would dump me for looking good(I kid you not), I fell out of love with him, and he begged me to stay, I stayed, and he did everything alright dis time, caring bf ever, and guess what, I fell in love with him, again, and I saw future, our relationship was perfect and then, without a reason, he told me he couldn’t be with me, because he can’t get over the fact that I wanted to leave him lol, he left, and I was the one left broken, my advise, keep walking. Don’t feel sorry for him. Keep walking sisters!

  12. Awo batho! Motho o kgona go bolawa motlhofo fela jaana. Whoever did ths to Lindiwe, an expectant mother is cruel beyond words. Cruel is an understatement really. Mcxm! Q&A Nana, I feel it wudnt be fare to take the guy back only cos u feel sorry fr them. I wudnt want anyone to take me back cos of pity. So, goya ka nna kare keep walking. Gape apart from that taking him back doesn’t guarantee being treated right by him. I feel its jus gonna be a circle of another dumping the other n being begged n getting back till the one who lose interest breaks it. He handed u the scissors, I say cut ur loses.
    Best wishes from sunny Bots:-*xoxoxo

  13. Nice one again Mike.
    On the cutting of brakes, I also suspect Khanyi (how did she know whom the message was about). I also think it was knowledge to sabotage Mxo’s car. Mxo should get Astha’s phone and make a copy of that message sent to Khayi.

    QnA
    It does not look fair to not give him a chance on his first begging while he gave you many chances when you were begging BUT as Eulanda said, I also think will not work at the end. You are going to be with each other for years but facing a big elephant in the room of waiting for the next person to do the dumping.

  14. Mike I jst can’t get enough! Thnx!I really believe dat 2 witches Khanyi and Astha is behind Lindiwe’s death! But nna 4 all I knw Lindiwe’s child might not b his bcoz he doesn’t remember anythng! As 4 da wife she might knw about Lindiwe bcoz da sister told her but how did she knw abot her pregnancy! She is wicked! He shud leave her!

  15. Yoh! Hai ndiyakuncoma bhuti memoirs are really entertaining and dramatic. Too nice!I hope what I’ve predicted won’t happen to Mxo. Asthendile is something else.

    QandA
    Sisi don’t waste your time with this fool of a man. He doesn’t want you back but can’t deal with the fact that u now have broken up with him(EGO right there!). And I wonder why u feel sorry for him coz he is the one who started this. Move and ul be happy u left him.

  16. Gr8 read Bra Mike, Bontleza u got to b kidding bra,cc we! lyk Jackzorro has just said Khaba lenja just to show him that u were begging him all that tym coz u loved him now u klaar he must take a hike

  17. mhhh mara Mike hai no shem ua talented bro thanx for the lovely chapter mara beyi short hay

    QnA dear u ought to cut ties with that guy shem, u showed him all the love in the world and yena he took advantage of u. i guess it is true when they say u dont know what uve got until u lose it and manje naye he realised that he has lost u for real this tym n manje hes tryin to win u back.. it mite not be because he still has genuine feelings for u mara it mite be simply because he has gotten used to the idea of havin u as his gf and he cant make peace with the fact that ua ova him..thats the downfall of being in a long term relationship with a lot of ups and downs, once ua on fed up leave thers no turning back (talking from experience). Dont give him another chance bcoz u feel pitty for him ah uzoba miserable dear….tell him dat u dont wanna be with him anymo n its nothing personal hay, he had his chance n he blew it so abe strong…

    Jackzororo…….yang tlatsa πŸ™‚

  18. mhhh mara Mike hai no shem ua talented bro thanx for the lovely chapter mara beyi short hay

    QnA dear u ought to cut ties with that guy shem, u showed him all the love in the world and yena he took advantage of u. i guess it is true when they say u dont know what uve got until u lose it and manje naye he realised that he has lost u for real this tym n manje hes tryin to win u back.. it mite not be because he still has genuine feelings for u mara it mite be simply because he has gotten used to the idea of havin u as his gf and he cant make peace with the fact that ua ova him..thats the downfall of being in a long term relationship with a lot of ups and downs, once ua on fed up leave thers no turning back (talking from experience). Dont give him another chance bcoz u feel pitty for him ah uzoba miserable dear….tell him dat u dont wanna be with him anymo n its nothing personal hay, he had his chance n he blew it so abe strong…

    Jackzororo…….yang tlatsa πŸ™‚

  19. U reap what u saw Sthandile that’s the product of not respecting your husband its comes to the point when u can’t take it anymore where u feel done and dusted lol what a lesson

  20. women are truly the most dangerous species God ever created. OMW to kill an unborn child that is just inhuman. Poor Lindiwe. Mxo hit the brakes and go deal severely with this two witches you have been fucking. Talk about bad taste in women! You really know how to pick them shem yho.

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