Memoirs – Chapter Seventy Two

Posted on Posted in Memoirs of a Tired Black Man

Khanyi refused to tell me where he stayed. I would have gone there immediately. She swore she did not know just that he was the one she had gone to for her to cool off. She asked me to calm down and not overreact because that would only cause a fight I would most likely not win because I knew very little about it. There is nothing more frustrating than suspecting something but not having the right information. I went to my room and lay down. There was a knock on my door and it was Zimasa. She closed the door behind and I thought, oh know here we go again. Was this kid trying to seduce me? I don’t think women get it, when you were a short skirt, in her case bum shorts disguised as nightwear it tends to be arousing. She sat on my wife’s dressing table stool. I was not sure what she was going to say because my mind was going many places at this moment. What the hell was happening to my marriage? A married woman does not sleep out of home when her husband is home even if he is not. This was not an open marriage!

After she had not said anything for about five minutes I asked what it was she wanted. She hesitated and I forced to out with it. She then looked at the door as though to check if someone was there and then turned and said,
“I don’t think you should trust what Khanyi tells you. I don’t trust her. She is too comfortable yesterday afternoon I caught her lying on your bed which is highly inappropriate. It’s like she is trying to replace your wife!”
She emphasised the ‘wife’ part I think to make sure I got that part correct. I had already picked that up. That was the other problem. Before I confront my wife I also had to consider that Khanyi clearly had an agenda. Women like to say that a good man is hard to find which is why they target other woman’s husbands I reckon. We give the semblance of being stable and secure hence why she does not want a man like yours but she wants your man. We are like the finished product. The more I thought about it the more it made sense. Mot many young black South African are stable at my age. Most are still paying off student loans, have many baby mamas and behave like little boys. Must be tough for a woman to find a good man then.

I had never actually looked at Zimasa to describe here. Zimasa was not a short girl. She was taller than my wife and one of those girls that developed early physically. I remember a few years ago when I met her getting surprised when she said she was only in grade 8. At that point I was sure she was probably in grade eleven or matric. It’s in the food I tell you. Kids today are jail traps because they develop so early and grow up so fast. It’s true. Most men if even the younger ones if you ask them they will tell you that on several occasions they have made a mistake and hit on a girl thinking she was of age only to find out she was born after 1996. It’s easy to call men creeps but when parents allow their kids to dress up as adults, when a man bumps into your child, she does not look like a child because of her height and physical development let alone the dress code. Zimasa was one of those girls that could get you into such trouble. She was a girl in a woman’s body. She told me that I should not listen to Khanyi because if I overreact I will kill my wife for all the wrong reasons. Counselled by a child! That’s how far I had fallen.

She left my room and went to her room. I guess I had a lot of decisions to make. At 0630 in the morning I got a call. I was still up imagine. Had not slept since. It was not my wife but Lindiwe. What did she want?

“I have good news. I have sorted out everything.”

She had said she was in Jhb yesterday but I had not entertained her that much because she was another problem. Now I was curious to find out how she had done that but that would mean I was interested in her schemes! I did not want to be bound to her! It was the last part that shocked me though,
“Today you are going back to work as normal. It’s already be arranged. I will only start tomorrow since I am this side. Thank you for being patient with me!”
She said. There was a sound in the background which I was not quite sure off but I swear it sounded like a man clear his throat. It was not of my business though. He was her problem not mine.

I was not sure what to make of this phone call. I was not about embarrass myself and walk back into the office then be chased out. Hell no. I wanted to go sink myself into my work so I could stop worrying about how messed up things were back home. I tried calling my wife again and there was no reply. It was off.

It was not ten minutes before my boss called me. All he said was I must come in to work today but must stop in his office first. Obviously I could not say no but I told him I would be about an hour later under the circumstances. He said it was fine as long as I see him. I was not sure whether I was happy or sad about this because what had Lindiwe done this time? I got ready for work. Khanyi told me that she was ready to go home and on Friday her sister was coming. That was ok with me. She asked me where I was going considering yesterday my wife had said I was fired. I told her that I was not fired and I was going to work. She could visit me in my office anytime I said for emphasis.

Driving down the M2 in traffic is never nice. After I passed the crosses on UCT middle campus I started feeling nervous. I was not ready to go back. At that moment I got an sms. It was from my wife! The bitch was alive! It read:

“I did something last night I was not supposed to have done. I am so ashamed of myself and I am so so sorry. I am too scared to come home because you will kill me for it and you know I cannot keep a secret from you. Please Mxolisi forgive me!”

It read! She had not said what she had done!

My head was about to explode!

****The End****

Michael Nkululeko Maphoto (fb)

Dear Mike

I am a 17 year old girl and am pregnant with my first child. I am in grade 11 and yes I messed up pretty badly. My mother barely talks to me and my father will not even look at me. He said to me when I give birth I must leave his grand child and leave his house to go look for a job. I disappointed them pretty badly. Now I am so scared of giving birth because where am I going to get a job. My parents are well to do and I am an only child. They sent me to live with my grandmother in the township because they said I embarrass them in front of all the people I grew up with. That’s how serious they are about this. What should I do to get back in their good graces? I have apologised so often I don’t know what else. My father does not even take my calls.

Thank You


37 thoughts on “Memoirs – Chapter Seventy Two

  1. Yoh Lenyalo ne… Sepedi sere nyala o nyele… Relax Mxo…. It could be something else,,, Do not let your imagination run wild now.

    @ Refiloe we all make mistake, Your parents love you and yes they are angry right now but with time they will cool of. Dont worry much about it. Stop stressing and make sure you and the baby are fine. They will come around. Perhaps this space will do all of you good.

  2. Dear Refeloe.
    I’ve been in ur situation, maybe not as harsh but I’ve been there. The reality of it is you owe it to yourself and your child to make something of ur life to make sure she gets the life ur parents provided for you. The only way to get that life is to get your matric. Finish school with no distarctions, do your best and the rest will sort itself out. Your parents will eventually speak to you. Try not to stress it isn’t good for your little one.

  3. Yho Mxolisi,before you explode she might has just kissed a guy and not what you about to think. Thanks Mikey

    Refiloe, parents turn to overreact when their children are pregnant, my friends’ aunt did the same thing,they sent her off to tembisa but now with baby is here and the aunt can’t get enough of the child. It will blow over shem. For now, tell them you want to write your exams depending how far you are in your pregnancy. They might be pissed but I doubt they will refuse you education. Push to write your exams and PASS!!!!!! Be praying that by the time you give birth they would have forgiven you and gotten used to the idea of you having a baby. Then when you ready go do your MATRIC!

  4. Thanks Mike. I wonder what Astha has done now?
    A to Q: give your parents time, they don’t hate you, they are just angry and dissappointed. I would also be like that! You have to shape up though. Make sure you do extremely well at school, try and get temp jobs for weekend so that they’ll see that you are trying to be responsible; lastly and not least – stay away from boys! Don’t even go to parties and all that jazz.

  5. Thank u Mike.

    Refiloe I was in a similiar situation 7 years ago. My parents were bitterly disappointed in me. But when my due date drew nearer they became xcited abt the fact that there wud b a little new member soon. They supported me in evry way possible. My daughter is now practically my little sister becos my parents do everything 4 her. Give them time, they”ll come around…

  6. It is normal for you Mxolisi to assume the worst about your wife, after what you have done behind her back.Just take a chill pill. Thnx Mikey.

  7. Hey Refiloe, Your parents will come around, focus on school and work really hard for your bundle of joy. Hope you get a scholarship.

    Kind regards

  8. Hawua Mikeesto such a tease bathong!! Can’t wait for Thursday, dankie bra Mike.

    Refiloe, I feel u lil sis, when I was ur age, two of my exes had aborted two of my kids, one of those I didn’t know about until a year later. Kuyanyeka in these situations and the only reason I had agreed to it was because she wouldve been kicked out of home. Even though we live our lives now and have a healthy babygirl, what if’s and if only’s still plague us.

    You must be very careful with whatever decision you make, coz that will stay with u til the end of ur days. Yes you made a mistake, yes you got pregnant before marriage and all that… But come on, we all make mistakes. Your parents doing this is also justufied, I mean come on, no parent would be happy under the circumstances. Give them time, they will come around eventually, and when they do, you need to tell them how vital it is for you to finish your studies so that you can offer a better life for your unborn child. They must see reason one way or the other. My advice, don’t make the same mistake twice. Getting pregnant is kak easy I tell you no lie, this I know personally.

    Even though I don’t condone your pregnancy at this age, judging right now would just be premature, so goodluck and congratulations. A baby is a blessing, regardless of the circumstance.


  9. Refiloe we Aldo mistakes i got preg wen i was in matric n my mom gave me a chance to go back to school wen i go to varsity i got preg again with twins ths time but my mom nvr gave up on me only my father ddnt want to see me again bt aft gaving birth he named my twins Mahlatse LE Mahlogonolo a Modimo thy fogave me and took me back to school and this time a made sure a finish my diploma get a job as am speaking my boy is 9 nd twins 6 and am only 27 bt am happy again
    with ths little story of mine am trying to show u that ur parent r not angry at they r just disappointed and gave them time by the time u give birth thy will forgive u and i will advice u to name the babe aft ur father am sure that will help

  10. Thanx Mikey, Guys if we are going to hide problems behind de trees we are going to have a generation that is not responsible. yes we all make mistakes n no 1 is perfect but y le pepetletsa bana ba lena as if dis is right? u need to highlight de dangers dey put demselves into so dat dey must not repeat what dey did, ‘ur parents are just angry they will come around’, Refiloe u messed up big time n ur parents have every right to be angry at u, we are living in a very informative world, n am sure u also get dis guidance at school, what happened to protective sex? is it for old ppl? what if ur pregnant n HIV positive? ur parents gave birth to u probably looking at deir pockets now u bringing dem another expense dat dey did not look at. dey are not only angry dey are disappointed n ashamed, bcos u have turned dem into irresponsible parents. being a teenage mother is very difficult, bear in mind dat ur teenage days r over, u need to grow up n do it very fast in order for ur parents to forgive u, forgiveness comes with action, start now n be responsible, work hard on ur school work n change de way u used to see de world, stay away from boys n stop partying, yes ur parents will come around but u need to work hard to get dem back again. Life is not as easy as u view it as a teen.

  11. I agre with you Khazethe, not many people went to that level of first ensuring that the child sees the dangers they have put themselves in, Jackzorro yes a child is a gift but the congratulations part is well…. sounds like well done.

  12. Thanks Bro Mike.
    Refiloe, your parents are angry and maybe I will also do the same. You made a mistake and there’s no turning back still you should know what you did was child and being a parent is no child’s play. Your parents will get over it and take you and the kid back but when they do make sure they don’t regret it. Its up to you now,you are a parent already so you better do your best in everything. We talking from experience. Pls pls pls don’t do it again, now its the time to make your parents proud by being the best mother to your kid and by being the best dota to them. After having a baby talk to your mum about school, ask her to draw up the house rules to show her u sorry for what u did. Refiloe please take care of the baby. I’m not judging but kids your age (some not all) are neglecting their responsibilities (I live with 1). Good luck and I hope your parents will forgive you before the baby is born.

  13. ka leboga Mike,mxolisi wait til u get da story ne.Refilwe jst give them time,all will b well…atlist u not on street u hv a roof,ha ba tlo gotshwarela ka moso…bt they will eventualy…

  14. QnA Refiloe time heals everything… Just leave them alone for a while dnt contact them…they will talk to u when they are ready…concentrate on you baby in the meantime u dnt need stress 2 afftect the little one…jst pray 4 them 2 come around

  15. Hallelujah…
    Yoh! What on earth is sthe trying to do never forgive cheating business let alone in marriage, yoh I just hope she nevet mentions how week she felt in another mans arms ,yoh mxolisi o tla mmontsha ga thabeng.

    Gal they just scared for ur life thats all . They wanted to give u the best they felt dissapointed also . Your goals now is to work hard on your marks to gain that trust back, though it won’t be easy. N dont be scared to give birth new lifes have a way of softening peoples heart and forget about problems they facing. Good luck baby girl.

  16. Thanx bra Mike u are the best

    Refiloe dear being pregnant at your age must have come as a shock to your parents, at this point in time you need to give them space hay and i know its not easy but you should just try to focus on your studies and now that there is a baby coming you seriously need to work hard and earn good marks so that u can be able to make ends meet for the baby…parents are like that they will sulk and they have every right to do so hay cause you have dissapointed them i mean as their only child they were expecting the best form you, but okwenzekile sekwenzekile hay dear just try to stay strong and with time all shall be well…My younger sister who is also 17 just gave birth to a healthy baby boy ekhaya they were so mad at her hay but manje all is forgotten hay…uzaba rite dear. i dont necessarily agree that what u guys are doing is ok but ke i life gal….

    much love
    Miss Tee

  17. Khazete where’s your chill? Talking about protective sex and stuff she’s already pregnant all you can do is lecture her not to repeat the same mistake twice, don’t tell me at ur age you’ve never hit it raw, so much jugding for the what? And for who? Not everyone is smart about life @17 if you’ve messed up and you admit it that’s one step forward cause uyalibona iphutha lakho and you’ve learnt from it, she has heard so much lecture from her parents all she needs is an advise not someone who’s gonna tell her how bad she’s been that doesn’t build it only gives you more reasons to fuck up cause you be like “oh no its whatever they already think am bad” khulisa ingane emqondweni ayi ukuyithethisa akwakhi lokho kuyabhidliza, QnA Give it time honey it will pass give them space to get used to all this, just focus on ur studies and show them you really wanna turn a new leaf, stay the hell away from trouble nanazi, start wit ur granMa be in her good books for sure they call her to check on ur behavior, its not about being in their good books but its about doing good to them and urself, obey ur parents honey at the end of the day you only have them and you dependent on them, I got preg at 20 my mum got sick bcos of it but guess who was the 1st to check on me at the Hosp? Her and even of today I live to please her cause I saw all she went thru bcos of my foolish choices, just know that everything you do have consequences sweety just like now kiss ur old life goodbye cause being a mum and a student aint no childs play, you’ll never be the same get used to that and GoodLuck on ur lil nana be the best mum ever…….

  18. Thank you Mikey… As for Asthandile hayi I really hope she didn’t go and sleep with another man, because in as much as Mxolisi has also had lots of shags… she will never hear the end of cheating|!

    Refiloe… where do I even start… Why do teenagers always say pregnancy is a mistake. When you open your legs for a boy to go into your private parts and you know very well you are not on any contraception, he is not wearing a condom… you WILL fall pregnant and you may even contract HIV or STI’s. So to every teenager out there reading this pregnancy is NOT a mistake… it is a RESULT of IRRESPONSIBLE action by two people. Okay now that I have vented that out, Refiloe you are already pregnant so the best is to give your parents some time. There are very angry at you, they are extremely disappointed, they probably have sleepless, praying that your pregnancy is just a nightmare and they will wake up and realise it was all just a bad dream. Unfortunately it is REALITY and they really need time to get used to all the bitterness and anger. Remember they did all they could to ensure that you are well taken care of. When a child falls pregnant as a parent you first blame yourself, you ask yourself what did I do wrong, what did I not provide for her that she had to do this to us, why couldn’t she be a good girl like we always wished she would… As a mother too I can truly feel your parents pain and I know for one that it would take a miracle for me to forgive my baby girl if she were to fall preggies!!!

    I am not scolding dear but I just want you and many teenagers to have a little idea of how heartbreaking it is when your babygirl falls pregnant!!!

  19. Bathong Evoque this blog so doesnt need bitter heartless people like you. Last I checked we were all here to learn from the obstacles we incur in life and give sound advice. Last I checked we were a family here. People take time to type these letters to be advised not to be judged. Who died and gave you the right to Judge? That is up to God and not you. I dislike characters like you whom think they are so perfect and are the next best thing after Jesus Christ. Have you never had unprotected sex? Skatlo re tena ka go ti tira skoon pampiri. I think its time mike blocked people like you from this blog for your unbecoming behaviors. Your statement is nothing but absolute hogwash. Nxa tsek!

  20. Lekgarebe why are you getting so emotional sisi?? Evoque is stating facts as she sees them and remember this is not only for Q&A, this is actually for everybody who might be reading this blog. Yes we have all made mistakes and yes we have all done it without a condom and when we shouldn’t have BUT that does not mean we shouldn’t say the truth anymore. Our youth is our future and they need to know the truth and be more responsible otherwise we don’t have a future. Q&A needs to know this was a terrible mistake and take rsponsibility for it. That is just life, otherwise she will never learn.

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