Memoirs – Chapter Ten

Posted on Posted in Memoirs of a Tired Black Man

I looked at her for a long while. She could see I was staring. I couldn’t help it. Even married men watch porn and it arouses us immensely. Women who take offense at their men watching porn really should be grateful that he is watching it on TV not in front of them as I was. I was incredibly turned on but I bit my bottom lip when I said good morning to her. I walked in and pretended that I could not even see that she was in a state of undress. I asked her if she slept well and when she responded I said awesome and went back upstairs. I was not playing games. It just felt wrong. No in my wife’s house! This was not going to happen. This woman much as I found her attractive had potential to wreck my home and that would not work for me. I loved my wife and I was not going to succumb to the very first sign of temptation that came my way. Females always tell me that there is something really attractive about a young married man. I think I get it though. As a guy when you are single it is so difficult to get a girlfriend. The moment you do however, all the other girls like you. Its like you have a magnate attached to you the way women love you. This includes women who do not even know you have a woman. Maybe you glow I don’t know. When you are married the ring is what makes you safe to talk to. To most women three things happen, one, you are safe to talk to meaning that without realizing it she is willing to get to know you and sit down with you because in her head she cannot foresee you hitting on her. You are like a pregnant woman to a guy, honestly who hit on you in your state? Secondly, there are women who love to flirt and tease married men the remind them that they chose to rush and shackle themselves up to a woman. Especially at the office. There is always that girl who will remind you that you are married even if you are not flirting with her. Again she is not doing it on purpose but what she succeeds in doing is take your moment of pride and eventually make you feel ashamed of it. Thirdly, you ring represents to other women that you are a decent guy and makes them question their own men as to why they don’t step up and do the right. They want to know what makes you so different from other guys. Usually they ask you for advice all the time. The more time you spend with them the more you get to know them.

I went to my room and tried to distract myself with some work but that simply did not work. My mind was bent towards her and going to see what she was doing. eventually I took a shower and told myself I had to be a man and go do what I needed to do. I found sitting on the couch watching the news of all things. She even told me what was going on before I asked. Truth be told my wife never did that. She was happy with Isibaya and Khumbule’khaya. Those are the things that made her happy. At times I watched with her and those were the only times I was allowed to say someone is beautiful who is not her. Those two girls Thandeka and Qondi drove me wild and I think even she realized that she could not stop me from finding someone on TV attractive. It was obvious I would never meet them in my life so she was not threatened. None of her friends looked like them so she felt if that was what I liked I would never look at the rest. It was now or never. I told her that I had to take her to pick up her car as I had places to go. That was a lie. I wanted her gone!

As we drove out she asked me if she had done something wrong. I did not hesitate to tell her that we were not going to happen. I told her that it was wrong and I was married. I wanted to make it clear that there was no future us. She acted confused and said we had only shared one kiss on a drunken night so why was I assuming that something more was going to happen. I was not going to be played for a fool. I gave her an example of her this morning but she said that how could she have known that I would come downstairs? She also asked what was she supposed to wear because she had no other clothes and I had let her sleep in last night clothing. Ok I didn’t have an answer for that. Naturally I had assumed a person making coffee in nothing but a towel was trying to seduce me. I did not apologize though. Men usually don’t apologize. It makes us reek of weakness. She said to me that she was so disappointed that I thought she was that kind of woman who would break up a happy home. This woman just knew how to play with my emotions.

I thought driving her home would be the most satisfactory think I would ever do in my life but to be honest it was not. It was quite underwhelming in fact. I am not saying I was expecting a triumphant return but I just felt my heart sink. They tell you constantly that doing the right thing makes you happy and feel fulfilled, oh well maybe I missed the memo. She joked and teased as though that incident had not happened. She honestly did not seem to give a fuck for lack of a better word. I was the one miserable. I just wished my wife would be here at this moment, to do what I dont know. When I dropped her off I felt like such a loser. She even hugged me. She did not act awkward at all. She got on the phone and some girlfriend of hers was inviting her to the beach. She turned the person down because it seemed to be a couples event. I could not help but wonder if things had happened differently if I would have been invited too. A lot of men would have paid me to be in my position but I had flopped dismally. As I drove on Main Road on the way back to my place every woman I saw just looked attractive. I wanted a woman so badly. Men its true no matter how some may defend themselves think with their dicks. Even our ego is not complete without a woman to acknowledge what a star you are.

When I got home I went to the room in which she had slept. I scrubbed that place clean. I did not want a single misplaced strand of hair that showed she was ever here to remain. How would I explain that to my wife honestly? I never do chores but every guy knows when you are trying to hide evidence you down on your knees and scrub that floor. I decided to call my wife. She was alone at home her parents and some of her relatives had gone to confront the doctor guy about Zimasa, the pregnant girl. Being home alone I figured I could have a bit of fun with my wife. She even acknowledged that she could hear in my voice that I was feeling kinda randy at that moment. I suggested phone sex and at first she laughed it off. She asked me if I was serious and I said yes because it would be fun and stimulating and showed how much I missed my baby.

She responded very sternly,

“You don’t respect me Mxolisi! Why would I have phone sex like I am an uncultured teenager? I am a married woman, your wife so do not treat me as though I am common! Next you will be asking me for oral sex!”


She hung up the phone.

I looked at that phone with what was beyond shock and anger! I even felt ashamed for asking her that. I looked at my ring and rolled it on my finger contemplating taking it off and going out but i remembered what a clutz I am so I would probably lose it.

What had I done wrong?

***The End***

Michael Nkululeko Maphoto

Hi Mike,

I have been dating the love of my life for almost 5 years now. In those 5 years, I have always been physically involved with another guy -he found out about 2 of them and forgave me! I love this guy so much and I know, without a doubt, that he loves me too. He is my rock, emotionally, but physically I have never been able to be with him alone; it is always him and one other guy. I can’t stop this physical desire for someone else. I fear that if we ever decide to get married I will not be able to stop this habit of mine, and I also fear that one day he will do the same to me (I know he isn’t cheating at the moment- I just do).

My questions are: Should I be expecting what I think might happen one day, that he will cheat on me too (especially since he forgave my infidelity so easily)? Is this even love or am I just hiding behind the emotional security?

Miss R

87 thoughts on “Memoirs – Chapter Ten

  1. Creativity : on point.

    Interesting? Definetely.

    Grammar and spelling? Nah .. no so sure if it’s on purpose or … but please edit your work bro. I’ll be happy to if you don’t have that kinda time.

      1. lol Spijo I was about to point out his spelling and he wants to edit the whole book, lol epic fail. People are so petty and quick to judge. #walksaway

    1. Rey 15, they say people in glass houses should not throw stones!!!! One can point out about 2/3 things that are off on your comment.

  2. top 10 yay! I don’t condone cheating but hai this woman is asking for it, it wouldn’t kill her to be spontaneous every once in a while…

  3. So this woman wont have fone sex or do oral sex cos she is ”married”??? and people wonder why married men cheat…not tht cheating is justified but….chai!!!! Thanx mike….great work as usual.

    1. Exactly what I was thinkin Vero. Is there a marriage guide that says you are not allowed to be spontaneous?? If thatz the case then I don’t want to get married. This woman is so boring

  4. what part of her would have come off if she had fone sex with her hubby? hayi suka maan, this man does not even get oral sex from his wife, yhooo where does she expect him to get it?

  5. Thank you for a fantastic chapter. Great read ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Miss R: What your doing to your boyfriend is wrong. You need to evaluate what your true feelings are in this relationship. Are you with him because he is dependable and reliable or is there more. Physical chemistry is a crucial ingredient to keeping a healthy relationship.If there is something that he does to turn you off, you need to communicate this with him so that the issue can be resolved. Otherwise find a relationship where you are truly fulfilled.

  6. Miss R-“physical desire for someone else” – Sounds like these a lack of passion between the two of you or his not satisfying you.Ego is everything to guys, guys dont just forgive that easy unless they know they’ve got a weakness.I’m sure he understand that he can’t satify you.
    Itโ€™s only natural that a cheater always fears being cheated on. Karma is a bitch unfortunately.
    My advice:
    1)start by being fair to him and tell him your physical needs and be patient with him as this could be a work-in-progress.
    2) If it doesnโ€™t work out let him date other people , maybe he will meet his match and you continue with someone that matches your physical needs.

  7. miss r, I will tell you this. your guy will eventfully be tired of your cheating. he loves you , and you don’t . You are just with him for your emotional wellbeing. One day he will walk out of your life, and trust me when I say you will only realize then how much you should have stopped sleeping with other ppl. trust me I Know.

    1. Yhooooo this wife aa she deserves to be cheated on. No doggie, fone sex and worse no oral sex nooo.

      Miss R you know what issues you are going thru please see a psychologist before you ruin everything that means something to you. You know your issues so please get help

  8. โ€œYou donโ€™t respect me Mxolisi! Why would I
    have phone sex like I am an uncultured
    teenager? I am a married woman, your wife so
    do not treat me as though I am common! Next
    you will be asking me for oral sex!โ€ lol ausi o bathong

  9. I wonder if he’s still gonna ride her,I wldnt even think twice,I can see khanyi in my immagination she’s hot and curvilitious.

  10. Miss R slping around with other man..Hiv e gona hey nt only tht..if he doesn’t plz u in bed leave him,honestly u dnt love this guy u are just selfish xam..

  11. Write your own blog and lets judge you on your grammar. You pay nothing to read his blog yet every day he posts something for you to enjoy. Shame on you

  12. @msR. Same thing happened wit me, n as much as he forgave, he did de same afta a few yrs. As I ws hurt n felt betrayed, I asked y n he said “u did de same remember”??. So yeah, men r jst dt,,, he will cheat, may not b today bt he wil

  13. This wife hates doggy-style, oral sex and also sure wa bora ka missionary position ya ge. Le nna if I was the guy I would cheat goed le gona ke sono.

  14. Eita Mike BIG UPS
    I think start a SA version on Jerry Springer, these Q&A stories mara.
    Miss R is asking for advice yet she knows the answers. If what you did was right (felt right) you wouldnt ask for bloody advice. another one that needs uswazi.

  15. Ijooo Rey15 ur fast on pointing out ada ppl mistake while ur busy repeating same mistake mxm.Tnx mike 4 de gr8 chapter dis book is rocking,Asthandile is pushing her husby away Khanyi will shag him, Q/A leave de poor man alone,surely he is not de luv of ur lyf u can’t cheat on s1 whom u love,go n luk 4 those who hav 6packs cos his physical appearance doesn’t satify u,ur loosing it big tym,

  16. Ao tjhe mosadi yeo haa etse phone sex le oral?N in da Ada chapter I remember Mxo are mosadi haa rate le doggy.Dis s too much now meaning its missionary only in dat house?Ai maan dis woman is pushing his man in other woman s hands maan.
    Miss R….lovey pls don’t have hundred eyes n billion feeling n focus on your man.Jus take a knife dear n take out those eyes n have only 2 eyes n take a fuel n burn those extra feelings ratu.Ho jella ba bang ho monate maar ho jellwa ho bohloko so be careful dat dis might come back @ n its not gonna be nice.Don’t play wit a good guy lovey.

  17. hi Mike tanx for chapter 10, bt u would like it if u keep posting each chapter everyday so dat we can’t miss a day without reading.

    And as for Khanyi she must come back as sap bcoz she will luz da man , while she’s busy with her family…..

  18. Omg lol… The way i love givin my guy oral sex, i was the one who initiated in the first place, he didnt say no but i think he was kinda scared and boy did he enjoy it, its our fav part of sex now and with out it sex would be just sex.. Its unlikely u find female that wanna give oral, so i get where the wife i coming from, even my friends think im crazy they would never give nor wanna recieve it.. I doubt all guys are like” the husband” he wants to enjoy sex so much with his wife but she holds back so much but i love how the guy is so patient with her (which is something we dont see often now-a-days) not trying to jump into other womans pretty sure him and khanyi would have and explosive sex experience and i fear uwife uzosala if or once that happens.. Guys could learn a thingor two in this novel too. Nice Mike

  19. โ€œYou donโ€™t respect me Mxolisi! Why would I
    have phone sex like I am an uncultured
    teenager? I am a married woman, your wife so
    do not treat me as though I am common! Next
    you will be asking me for oral sex!โ€

    Yhoooooo hayi no this woman is so rural thyini. Since when is phone sex such a big deal

  20. this woman is so typical,whts wrng wit phone sex if its ur hubby? no wnder y sex bcums a chore to married lacks adventure nd fun.

    i wud go dwn on my hubby if he dus de same…bt den i gez we ol prefer diffrnt thngs.

  21. thank u ta Mike, atleast ur no longer coming on us sooo strong abt dis guy and his cheating, loving de book atleast learning thing or two

  22. Eban this lady… I swear she’ll kill herself when she can once find her husband cheating on her. Wake up sisi and satiesfy your man, phone/oral sex doesn’t hurt when doing it to your hubby others there’s ladies out there who’ll do exactly what you can’t do ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Thanks ta Mike

  23. Interesting line… why would this woman refuse to give her husband phone sex. If culture doesnt allow phone sex, does it allow any other sex? So Khanyi decided to be dropped in her place……..has she forgotten about her car that she left at the party? Or is it one of those things of driving from joburg to ebhubesini in one minute….! Mike, let this guy f*** khanyi, in anycase, the first line in this book was about him confessing to the sin. Lets get to the *dance* part! Suspension is killing me

  24. Mike, everytime I read Confessions I had an impression that you will eventually combine it with DiaryOfAZuluGirl. Characters and names fitted well with each other. I hope that was your intentions……cause if not……lets please have chapter 100.

    Oooh, I saw a comment from DineoT yesterday and I would like to commend you on your storyline. I think we read and understand things differently, unfortunately thats the sad truth about life. Although I think you are exposing a lot about this type of a man, cause not every man cheats. Bring it on, and thank you so much for the best storylines!

  25. Yes we know men cheat! But this woman is pushing her husband. What’s wrong with oral sex for a married couple?

  26. No phone sex, no oral sex, no doggy style – so what exactly does this woman do in the bedroom? I bet you she won’t have it anywhere else than her marital bed, not in the shower, nor office nor car, tjo – uyabhora cc, if I have to say so myself. I don’t condone ppl cheating, but this guy really is missing a good shag, and if he can get it somewhere, you’ll be doomed!!! Uyosala ne ring yakho leyo igcwele umunwe! Thanks Mike.

  27. Load shedding affecting the whole of SA yerr.. Thank you mike. I’m lovin it #Memoirs. @ Miss R you have a serious problem because yo are not contempt with what u have (BF of 5 years) you have developed a habit of lust. You need help counselling like an addict you’ve admitted you have a problem which is a good sign. Now the problem ur faced with is not only physically but it is also spiritual. You need to address it by seeking the necessary channels. There is no quick fix for it. All the best

  28. Shooooo… This woman is soooo boring stru… How can she deny her man good time mara… Gr8 chapter Mike I am loving it.

    As 4 da question cc I must say you are messing up the poor guy. If you can’t be with him physically why are you still keeping him? If you can respect him enough 2 keep your cookie 2 urself why deny women who will treat him better da change 2 have him. Leave him and do with your life. Maybe yร“u will be much happier then.

  29. Na shame…no oral sex? Ladies if u love your man .. Least u could do is give him head…No discussion necessary.. Its 2014 and the war against the nyatsi is getting tougher lol. take it and own it.

  30. To all you people worrying about my comment :

    If he wants to maintain his followers and also lure in new ones, he needs to be able to cater for all readers. Not just the ones who are satisfied with mediocre spelling and grammar.

    How else is he supposed to be recognised because spelling mistakes to me just mean that he is unprofessional and has very little care for his work.

    The mistakes put me off and cause me to enjoy the blog less.

    I’m not an ass-kisser who’s going to applaud even with unsatisfactory. I’m a critic and I’m merely doing him a favour that will benefit him in the future. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Now, stop bickering. ๐Ÿ™‚

  31. Kwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaks ayeye no phone sex and no oral sex,shame dis guy will just fantasize about blow jobs-thanks Mike

  32. Rey15 go and get laid, you can even ask for oral sex and frankly we all don’t give a squad!!! Mike is the one who is doing us a favour, if your don’t like what you see, go buy some book from exclusive books. stop irritating us with your nonsense. or is it that your wife or girlfriend is exactly like asthandile??? Bugger off pleeeaase. you can comment on my spelling gramatician. kwaaaaaaaks!

  33. Haaaaaaibo!!! Mxolisi’s wife is such a bore!!!oh for fuck sakes #excuse the english# go to Khanyi papa, ur wife wa bora shem…

  34. We are not worried about ur comment and no one is kissing ass here. For sure, no one wants mediocre work and I commend u for speaking up. But the concern is that u wrote 5 sentences on your comment, u have a minimum of 4 mistakes. So, how exactly can we count on ur proof-reading skills?

  35. Lol wuu Asthandile uyaphoswa mfaz! Awaz yiin kuthi yamnandi into???? Lol great chapter as always Ta Mike thanx. Death by Tshidi’s “grammatician” kwaaaaaaaaaaaks! As 4de qna ai Rey u need a deep prayer cc uneNkinga!

  36. Goody , goody*******************************Q@A : no comment bcoz I have never been in your situation of loving someone but still you say you want someone alse on the side.

  37. miss R u are playing wth fire surely drz smthn dtz lacking in your relationship or is it sex ?coz if dtz so dn ul always cheat on him and my question 2 u is r wth ur guy cz of al the thngz he does 4 u (money) n u cant afford 2 loos al that thats y u cnt afford to lose him ? U xud do da ryt thng cz ur boyfrnd deserves much better dan u cheating on him. Decide what u want n stop w8sting oda pplz tym

  38. Lol you are all short minded, really.

    I will continue to voice out my opinions. I shouldn’t be forced to settle for “just ok”.

    Your ass kissing is not goin to get Mike anywhere. Infact, it will just kill him in the long run because he thinks his work is good and there’s nothing wrong with just doing the minimal.

    I can make as many speillling mistakes as I want (I’ve just mispelt “spelling” on purpose for example) because I’m not the one who’s writing a blog here. I’m not the one who has make their work readable because I don’t even care what you think.

    1. @Rey15 Just SHUT up!!! You aren’t forced to read the “mediocrity” of the blog if you take such umbrage to it.

  39. @Rey15 Duh,its a diary entry remember,so you don’t practicaly edit every single thing,,,That’s what makes the diary what it is,mistakes and all* and we love it! ๐Ÿ™‚

  40. Rey 15 awume ngesicefe dis is not about u, y dnt u write ur own blogs nd read them urself. I guess everything about u is perfect duh:>. Mike thanx dear kp it up, we lv it dat’s y we kp on demanding for ada chapters frm all ur blogs. I ms confessions though:(. Bt tnx dear mwaah

  41. A2Q: maybe you b-friend is gay. have you thought about that. guys dont forgive that easily. i think you must leave him and find sum1 who will satisfy you physically. lmao @ Cego……

  42. lol honestly speaking couples should venture at different places and should never lose the spark, I mean for this cultured women doesn’t she have any friends whereby they talk about what fantasy men, surely she is not blowing her man nor giving it a breast twist oh my, lol ladies we need to share this at all times and never be ashamed of what arouses our men. nice one man

  43. Smtimes its best if we do certain things b4 we are married cos if my husband asks 4 fne sex we would gladly do it as I would know we used to do it smtimes. Now the question would b who taught him all this things whn he all of a sudden wants to do dat. Guys practice dis things b4 u marry so ur wmn knws dat smtmes u jst want to b spontaneous nd it won’t b a suprise

  44. Iโ€™m not the one who has make their work readable because I donโ€™t even care what you think #engrish.

    Rey dude go lick ur dumbass.Mike can write backwards n I wl stl read it.

    Take ur dumbass elsewhr n go play wt ur tiny brain.Stupid FOOL.o bua nyoso

  45. LOL.. Please God help me remain the way I am even after marriage… I would die without phone sex and oral sex lol

  46. LOL!!! Mara Phone sex? Hae I am kinky but can never understand people shagging over a phone seriously Now! I think watching porn whilst I help myself is even better KANNETE!!!

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