Memoirs – Chapter Two

Posted on Posted in Memoirs of a Tired Black Man

I think a bit of a background is critical to how I fell out of love with the woman I swore to love and protect till death do us part. I was not born a cheat nor so cold but after spending so much time with a woman any man can tell you that you don’t come out quite the same. Asthandile was that girl who made sure she never put a foot wrong when it came to looking proper. She made sure she surrounded herself with go getters even though she was not the smartest. With her beauty and the way people were willing to spoil her it meant that she never had to put much effort into her life. I doubt this girl could even fart in private without feeling it messed up her image. With all this said imagine how I felt when she asked for my numbers. I thought it was a prank to be honest. There is no guy who can tell you that he never had a girl he desperately liked at some point but she never even looked at him. Asthandile was that girl to me. I made a conscious effort to make sure that I called her that night and we spoke for hours. That was how our relationship started. Funny thing is I didn’t even get to see her as she left for Umtata the following day. She was attending some college there. At some point over the years in university we lost contact., dated other people but as fate would have it our feet led to each other in the end. Ok fine, I exaggerate, as soon as I got my first car I went to find her. There was a party on her street and I knew from facebook that she would be around. It was a wedding infact and I was not even invited.

I paid my cousin, the one invited to take me as her date because I knew she would be there. I made sure I arrived a bit late so that as many people as possible could see my German machine. In a township that news travels fast. I didn’t see her for the first few hours of the most dreadful wedding I have ever attended. A lot of girls were giving me eyes, some even spoke to me but I was a man on a mission. I made a conscious effort to make sure that I called her that night and we spoke for hours. That was how our relationship started. Funny thing is I didn’t even get to see her as she left for Umtata the following day. She was attending some college there. At some point over the years in university we lost contact., dated other people but as fate would have it our feet led to each other in the end. Ok fine, I exaggerate, as soon as I got my first car I went to find her. There was a party on her street and I knew from facebook that she would be around. It was a wedding in fact and I was not even invited. I paid my cousin, the one invited to take me as her date because I knew she would be there. I made sure I arrived a bit late so that as many people as possible could see my German machine. In a township that news travels fast. I didn’t see her for the first few hours of the most dreadful wedding I have ever attended. A lot of girls were giving me eyes, some even spoke to me but I was a man on a mission. When I was about to leave, after the sun had thoroughly burnt me for my efforts I felt someone tap me on the shoulder. It was her. I won’t lie she looked even more beautiful than I remembered her. She asked me how I knew the couple and I told her my cousin had no date so had to do the honourable thing. She asked where my ring was as she could see now and I told her I will tell her where it was as soon as she tells me where hers is. My cousin, typical kasi girl, made a plan and some guy drove her home. I told her that I had to go because the sun had done a number on me but she said I should come with her to her house as she was home alone her parents where in Bizane. My plan was working. I opened the door for her and when that German machine roared into life I knew half the job was done. Women are too proud to admit it but the better your car is the more your points are at first impression and what’s worse, as guys we know that too!

I think only the most optimistic naΓ―ve person still believes that men and women see marriage through the same eyes and hold the same values. The very same blessing of modernity and equal rights that women fought so long and so hard to achieve is the very same yoke of burden they unwittingly brought to marriage especially unto themselves. Once upon a time it was shameful for men to leave their children on the streets in poverty so much as they would have no one to fend for them. Most at least tried to maintain their children as employment opportunities didn’t favour women. Nowadays with all these beautiful rights you fought for! your man will not hesitate to tell you that you already have a job so you shall be fine or get a job and stop asking me for more money..

Daluxolo was very unhappy with me when I told my wife that she didn’t have to work. I would take care of her ndiyi ntloko yelikhaya (I am the head of house). His argument was and still is, if your man asks you to leave your job or not get a job to take care of the family then you must know that going down the line you will have a problem. It doesn’t matter how rich he is, the fact that you are entirely dependent on him means that in future when the fights start, and make no mistake about it they will start, you will have nowhere to turn. Asthandile was a beauty queen in her day at school so it did not take much encouragement for her not to work. She was already a lazy somebody and I still wonder how she even managed to give birth! Being a beauty queen in a township often meant that she wanted to maintain her status in the neighbourhood of being the best dressed lady. She is not ratchet or loud but rather soft spoken. I must admit I played a role in her not getting a job because I never really encouraged it. As a man earning a good salary it always feels good to know you can take care of your family without hustle. Unfortunately this backfired in more ways than one.

Look, choosing between my mother and my wife is a no brainer. My mother wins but not before my wife is fed, my kids housed and my family safe. Asking me to take care of her mother the way I take care of mine however was how I think all the problems started. At first I didn’t see it but when I realized that we visited her parents every weekend and when it came to mine she made excuses we disagreed. All of a sudden she said it was because I hated her parents. Imagine. After all the weekend we had spent visiting her folks now I was being told I hated them for wanting to visit my wife once.

Hence my story begins in earnest…

****The END****

@diaryofazulugal
Mikeatdiary
Michael Nkululeko Maphoto (facebook)

Question

Dear Mike
I am a 35year old woman and I believe that all men cheat at some point. I have dated many men over the years and not one ever said that he has never cheated. They are actualy proud of how they got one over the girl. My question to your readers is that what is the best way to deal with these cheating men if you are dating a cheat?

Thank You

Tumi

112 thoughts on “Memoirs – Chapter Two

  1. This was the sortest chapter u eva wrote Mr Mike! Half of it was repitition. Nonetheless,great work. I hope you will soon resurrect Misteps of a young wife,yes? That would be great.

  2. Thanks Mike, don’t know if you’ve seen this, but there’s a part in the second paragraph that repeat what you wrote on the first paragraph.

  3. Mike … i appreciate what you do but today’s blog is not so great. you repeated the first paragraph in the second…or was that for emphasis? i get that we always want more, but don’t be scared to hold out for a bit just so you put out quality work.

    1. ai Nana as i was about to say that..its starting to be a bore i think you need to continue with the other two books nje this cheating story siya bora nd its gna be too obvious will end up concluding for ourselves

  4. Rather below your standards Mike. The errors are too many. What’s up r u ok? Maybe you need a break coz ubhala everyday. Your stories are addictive though.

  5. Aaaah Mike u knw hw far tuesday is mara? Happy valentines day!!!!
    Tumi,Tumi,Tumi…cheat on him too,2 wrongs dnt make it rite,wht he can do u can do too,yes men cheat we 4giv dem take dem bck blah blah blah cheat coz u want 2,hav a relationship wit da othr guy dnt fall in love,he won’t stop cheating until he decides 2 stop!

  6. Mike pls I dnt understand this chapter here now I’m waiting to find out wat did u do when u got to her house , the next thing its parents. Wats wrong vele

  7. Hi Mike,

    Today’s chapter was really not up to standard. There are too many mistakes, you repeated the first paragraph, the storyline is all over the place and you in the last line, you worte wife and not mother.

    You have a great thing going here and you did it alone. But don’t be afraid to get an editor or a professional writer to help you improve.

    Regards,

    A HUGE FAN
    xoxoxo

  8. I’m so dissapointed in u Mike, u repeat the same thing oh no! What wrong now. Finish the confession fisrt because u have to finish one the books anyway then continue with this cheating husband.or u have to tell where to get the books and how much so that we can finish for ourselves cs really I’m getting bored

  9. Her house? Her parents? What :/ this was very disappointing Mike come on my guy and the repetition? This is not what you got us used to ey πŸ™ too many errors it sounds like a rushed job,there was no climax nex oh well hope the next one will be better πŸ™‚

  10. Owk mike this is bad ma brada,writing 2 books at the same time is starting to catch up with u,maybe u were rushing to spoil ur nana since its valentines day,happy valentine to yall,mike plz jst dnt try nd prove ur a great writa we knw tht jst write 1 book nd finish it thn anada coz realli next tym u gona leave it too nd let us down “AGAIN”

    1. Bra Mike can you kindly rewrite this chapter please?? it is too confusing, too many errors, cant follow the story line etc. Please toe πŸ™

  11. I know this is for free, but the grammar and repetition and wrong people being used at the wrong parts in the story made me confused.

  12. Jim Carrey once said “to those who are in love, Happi Valentine’s day. And to those who don’t have that special someone, Happy Wish I Was Dead Day” enjoy ur day everyone, regardless ur status.

    Thanx for yet another good chaper Mike.

    1. it is very confusing Mike. i thought we were about to hear when and how they met, then to marriage and lastly to where the problems started. but in this case everything its mixed.
      however i will like to hear more as to what leads to man cheating

  13. Ai Mike namuhla u ddnt give us yo all,kwenzakalan?? Anyway we want more and please do read before you post so u can rectify all errors.
    HVD,love you.

  14. Happy Valetines to you and yours!. Mike, there was a repitition in your story line today. Being the great author you are, Ill take it. The story is still starting and surely this is just a build up and background. I like your idea! Great work.

  15. A/Q I was once dating a guy who was a daylight cheat, he use to talk to his girlfriends in front of me, when I made him food then the call will enter while he was eating the girlfriend will ask him what is he eating he will count each and every thing in the plate and when the girl ask him who made that food for him he will say kiCECI, he use to call the helper of his house CECI. Even when she is off over the weekend its only me and him in the house. You know what I did MPUMI ???I LEFT HIM. And now I’m very happy with my fiancΓ©e I’m getting married September, and I trust my fiancΓ©e with every thing I. there is no hidden agenda between us when his phone ring he ask me to answer it for him or If there is an SMS coming in he ask me to check who is it. And with a cheating man there is no way he will let you next to his phone nomakanjani same with me he answer my phone and read my SMS’s for me, all I want to say you will find someone who will appreciate you and respect you and cherish you one day. Leave him Leave the cheating bustard .

  16. Ay I thought i was the only 1…going to her parents house, Daluxolo, Asathandile giving birth, etc…this is just too confusing Mikey

  17. Mike this book is just terrible…i just dont like it…just go back to Confession and The Dairy…those two books makes sence..as for this one just leave it, it has no direction.

    You are great writer, but for this Cheating one…hai sorry boy it sucks!

  18. Not happy with this chapter,what’s up the with the repeat???and it was TOO short :(…and what happened to Missteps??????????hope you’re gonna keep up with this one not leave. Us hanging like you did with Missteps

  19. Mike, what’s wrong! I luv ur work bt this chapter is so confusing! Who is Daluxolo now?? Is Asithandile his wife? Mayb this confusion is bcoz u r giving it a direction! I can’t wait 4 de next chapter though!

    Plz bring back Missteps also! I loved it. Thanks. Advice – plz read what uve written before u post it!

    Thanks ngento yonke kodwa!

  20. Mike who is Daluxolo?

    this second chapter is below the standard yuo have set for yourself. I have overlooked the spelling and punctuation errors on DOAZG and Confessions; i

  21. Mike who is Daluxolo?

    this second chapter is below the standard you have set for yourself. I have overlooked the spelling and punctuation errors on DOAZG and Confessions; I think its time you try reading before you publish so you can minimize such. The repetition and the confusion on this chapter is a bit much. I have come to a point where i feel you are not the one writing Memoirs. Please stick to Zulu girl and confessions.

    Happy Valentines day.

  22. Attention to everyone that posted negative comments on current chapter, I mean who aru to judge!! Mike doesn’t work for any of us, we don’t even pay a cent to read.no one is forced to read, if u feel that Mike doesn’t meet your standards,please stop reading than.I know we have rites bt please let practice them in a good way everyone body makes mistakes even Mike does. So give him a break.

  23. This story is so confusing (maybe thats the whole idea)…it would be nice if you tell the story bit by bit cos now everything is just mixed up resulting in confusion.

  24. Thanks Mike. not your best but i like your work.

    Answer for Tumi. Firstly, being in a relationship means you have a fulltime job so always be on your toes and work if you want to keep it.

    We can never trully say all men cheat when we have not been through all of them, however what i always say. about men, they like little boys that need to be spoon fed. look at how the majority act towards theirs mother, little babies. as woman we always need to take into consideration when dating a grown ass men, you always feed it and clean its ass. No to them actually means Yes. its their way of rebelling towards thinking they are being controlled.

    Remember, they cheat because they can not because you led them to it. theres is not much you can do about that. you want to stay with your cheating partner, give him space when you feel you always want to be around. this is to give him a chance to miss you. if you stay with him, encourage him to be out with his friends without you there. if he has a hangover the next day, nurse it cause thats your little baby to take care of.

    If he cheats and you find out (not becuse you searched for it, but because the truth came to you)…. You really need to make him understand what he did was wrong and it hurts, so make him feel the pain, as long as it takes. dont be weak. If he doesnt understand, he doesnt value you. Move.

    Lastly, if he can cheat, he must learn to hide it. You teach him that too.

  25. Zandi awkahle ukpaqa sisi,we all concerned here,uthando silufuna ngendlela engafan bt ay kanje sistaz,we dnt pay nothing yes wena are u being paid to say tht?mike statrtd ths book on a higher note nd we wish for consistance,,I valentine futh 2day plz awuhambe yo defenda umuntu wakho ndlin mawunaye nd leave tht shaky defence of yoz to mikez gf

  26. Siyanda I see it getting personal since u mentioned my name, well bhuti ngisazosho ukuthi if ur not happy get something else to read.u don’t have to insult me, well indoda yangempela ibingeke yenze njengawe. N please let not make this a platform to dispect each other . It all abt Mike after all.

  27. I know mistakes are human errors but today Mike!!!!!! This chapter is such a massSsS. Rush jobs are not always good please don’t write 2 chapters on the same day again ngoba that will lower your std due to the errors

  28. Mike are you okay? Can u just finish confessions and then continue with other books, you will end up being stressed when u running many books at the same time! Thank u.

  29. Thanks mike,but check the last sentence … “I was being told that I hated them because I wanted to visit my own wife”???

  30. @Zandi dear we don’t need to be paying his bills or for the blog in order to give constructive criticism. We do give compliments and credit where due. No need for you to get all rude about it honey… Everyone is entitled to their own opinion and not everyone will share the same sentiments on everything. Let’s respect each other like that…

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