I was not sorry when my wife cheated! In fact she did me a favour and gave me an excuse to live my life. I did not divorce her either. What for? Only a fool divorces in this economy! Its bloody expensive and you stand to lose more than you even thought you had to start with. Yes, I was angry, very in fact!!! She slept outside that night and went back to her family home for a month. She tried to say I was cheating too but when I asked her to prove it she did not have a shred of evidence. It gave me justifications and something to hold over her head. I was already cheating in any case, once with her first cousin even but that is not what this is about. Women are so quick to send each other these little texts on what a real man should do when not one day have they ever carried a dick between their legs, paid lobola nor have to make sure that they keep the house financially stable when they are married. Doing the budget on my salary at the end of the month will never equate to the work I put in every day to take of you. As a reward you eat more and more and get fat then expect me to tell you that baby you still look as good as you did when I first met you. Really! You complain, you nag and remind me how much you are taking care of my children like they are not yours as well. Do I think its hard work to raise kids? Yes, of course and I respect that but my contributions make it easier whether you care to admit it or not. Forever gossiping about me with your mother and sisters is not the same as having someone to feed you. You a housewife yet we still have a nanny at home! If she wasn’t that old I would probably sleep with her too because you can hardly wipe your ass the way you are lazy! You only have energy to go to church. The sex is dead and you just lie there making it a chore and I even feel guilty bringing it up. Anyway I am getting excited let me start from the beginning…
Its not a secret that the more success you have as a man the more women you attract. I don’t know if its because you bath better now since you the money to afford better soap than sunlight or if its because you have more confidence when you have money? Confidence is key I really don’t know because my looks never changed that much. I have always been just a bit below average looking depending on what angle you look at me from and before you laugh probably more good looking than half of your partners. Ok, I am just kidding. I didn’t grow up rich, Mdantsane really isn’t known for how rich the people are so no surprises there. I went to Mzomhle High School. I got lucky enough to get financial aid to go to the University of Cape Town where I studied law.
I am going to be honest, dating was not the easiest things because in high school there is always that group of girls that all the guys want. That’s the group that dates either the older guys or richer guys. The rest, well, they are the rest. University where I come from changes everything. For someone like me being at UCT meant that I became the top of the food chain without even trying to. All those girls that never wanted me noted my potential and made a conscious effort to befriend me and date me. Its funny really when I think about it. Our girls are on some other level. In her mind is the fact that if my man is doing engineering, medicine, bcom or any other degree worth mentioning he is an investment. Worst case scenario he will get me pregnant and even if he dumps me afterwards, with his worth he will pay a lot of maintenance money meaning I am set for life. This is why per capita there is no South African tribe that has a higher concentration of men paying maintenance than us. The girl I never got in high school, her name was Asthandile. She claimed its because I never spoke to her in high school because she would have spoken to me but whom is she kidding. Guys would beat you up just for looking at her. First semester holiday when I got home she sent her little brother to ask me for my numbers. That’s how my value rose just by going to university and its very significant in my story because around here Walter Sisulu University is an achievement.
To say I loved her is an understatement. She was everything I ever dreamed of in high school. Her sending her little brother that day was a game changer in my social status. Even the guys that sat at the corner in my neighbourhood, most are still sitting there to be honest started giving me respect. One day I will be able to buy them booze or cigarettes andithi since clearly they were going to grow old at that corner. Everyone invests in you even the losers. Dating her was like a reflector vest highlighting that he has arrived.
Needless to say one day I would eventually marry her making it the worst decision I ever made. Marriage for most men is pressured on you because in all honesty its a noose that marks the beginning of the end. A wife just has a way of sucking the energy out of you. You can’t exactly tell her that or women that but when men sit around as men to have drinks (that’s if she even allows you too) they ALL complain. Its very hard to find a man who cheated on his wife who was ever truly sorry that he did it. Its as simple as that to us. Women often try complicate us men and think that we should think like them. Problem is, if we did then we would be the ones saying ‘yes I will marry you” as opposed to the other way round. I know women want to hear that its 50\50 all the way but whom are they kidding because in every forum they are in be it relationship or work it never truly is.
Goodness I have gone ahead of myself. My name is Mxolisi Sibani and I have been married for eight years now. Two of those years were magical I won’t lie but the day we decided on children meant the next six years have been torture. I don’t even believe that one of the kids is mine but rocking the boat would just make matters worse.
I am grateful though, I have a warm plate, little conversation and sex when I want it because she knows that without sex she might as well move out permanently. That’s not to say I have been faithful. Eish, I still have to get to how Khanyi and I became close.
Oh, Khanyi is my wife’s best friend and the greatest shag I have ever had. They are so close that when I fight with my wife she goes to her place to sleep over!
I guess I should start from the beginning and tell you why men cheat and women stay whether they know or not…
Michael Nkululeko Maphoto (fb)
Why do you think your men cheat on you and guys if you have ever been cheated why do you think she did so?
Welcome to my new blog. I hope we have as much fun, arguments, debates and controversies as we have had with Confessions of A Sugar Baby which I am afraid needs a break and to breathe a little. The underlying theme in this blog is why men cheat, how they do it, how they justify it and how they often lose more than they gain. This story will be from a male perspective (finally lol)