Confessions – Chapter Eighty Nine

Posted on Posted in Confessions of a SugarBaby

I don’t think any child is born as a problem child. Circumstances are what usually cause them or us to react into being a so called rebel. Just last week this girl did not exist in our lives and in a space of seven days she had not only wormed herself to being my fathers favourite but also taken my potential man. How does that work? Everyone wants to blame me but try having everything taken away from you with your eyes fully open like a fish then you will see why I was fighting back. What did he mean getting married? Just two days ago when I was in Jhb he had asked us to work things out! So when did he get to have this heart to heart. I was not angry because I was selfish I was angry because this guy was playing with my heart.

For black people being a doctor has to be one of the greatest pride for a parent. Back in the day when black people were policemen, nurses and teachers a doctor was a rare commodity. I think for my father, as he was old in any case, this meant that his new favourite daughter had done so well. Forgotten was the fact that his favourite daughter had gotten pregnant off a one stand. I am just putting it out there. What kind of a good girl does that? Opening your legs to a man you met a few hours ago! That’s just nasty. Only difference between Dumi and the other guys who do one night stands is that the fool had actually given this bicycle his real numbers on the day. Most guys would give you a fake one and walk away. Let’s see if she would have kept the baby then. Hypocrite! Like her father she only wanted his doctor title and the fool didn’t even realize that. Why hadn’t he accepted her earlier? Now that she fully pregnant he was speaking marriage. Clearly being a doctor doesn’t necessarily equate to you being smart! My father was very happy. My mother I guess knowing her place offered to make them tea or coffee. Funny thing is they said coffee and we didn’t even have it I am certain. The dutiful father to be fortunately said no to Sebo about the coffee saying she was to close to giving birth to be drinking coffee. I should have thrown up at that moment.

Angry as I was about all this I held my nerve even when my father asked me “how great is this, not only do you have a new sister but also a new brother in law?” And people say I am petty. This was like cruel and unusual punishment. My life really was messed up. I was glad for one thing though, for now at least, the cheque had been forgotten. Yes, even my mother had forgotten about her daughter who had almost been murdered. Not that I was complaining though. I needed someone to talk to. I don’t know how it got to this but the only person who could understand my frustration about Dumi was Tswelelo. I know she was at work but I called her nonetheless. She said she would call me in two minutes as she was parking. Thank heavens for that for I had no airtime. She called back and asked what was wrong (clearly I never called her). I told her everything that at happened and she listened attentively making shocked expressions at every turn. When I was done she called him a fool and yet again he was making a rash decision. She even said something I did not expect and said there was a huge possibility that the child was not even his so why was he committing now before it came. Typical Dumi, forever impulsive. She said in his head he was doing the right thing because he was that guy that almost always seemed to have good intentions yet never realized it came at his expense. She said she will get all his friends to have an intervention on him but Dumi had this thing of once his mind is made up, he remains steadfast good or bad. Don’t you just hate it when another woman knows your man more than you do? Just saying am not fighting.

Somehow I felt better after that conversation. I had forgotten that the baby might not have been his. I might be a sugar baby but I don’t do one night stands. I have more class than that. For me if there was a hierarchy for being slutty, a one night stand is possibly one step above being prostitution. Ok no let me do my hierarchy of sluthood… At 1. Le panta (when a girl gets done my many guys at one sitting) 2. Prostitute 3. One Night Stand (do you lack self respect for yourself that much. I don’t care how hot the guy is or how nice the alcohol tasted shut those legs) 4. Threesome (yeah I know people think its sexy but think about it, his dick in you then in her then you again. Girl you need Jesus for even agreeing to that) 5. Me… Sugarbaby. See am not biased I just call it like I see it. Anyway, what was Dumi thinking? Like seriously going to wife Sebo after all this? Really. Ah he was stupid as far as I was concerned.

My mother came to my room and asked me if I was ok. I said yes so as not to raise suspicion. For the first time since all this Dumi \ Sebo thing started she acknowledged my relationship with him when she told me she knew we had had a thing going on but this was for the best. I asked her how she could say that because she of all people was supposed to be on my side. Imagine, she pulled out the young card and told me I am in matric I am too young for him. Was she not the one who had encouraged us? I was so unhappy at that comment but again I held my nerve. She told me I had to let it go the decision had been made. She left my room.

We shall see! I was going to get them apart. He deserved better. He deserved me. I was going to dig up dirt on my so called sister and I was even going to church and pray that she gives birth to a white child just to make sure that the child wasn’t his. Ok fine, she was too ghetto to get a white man and too light in complexion because they like us darker. Mmmm, maybe a Colored baby then. Just saying.

I had resolved this to myself,

I was going to save him!

****The End****

@diaryofazulugal
Michael Nkululeko Maphoto (fb)
Mikeatdiary (instagram)

Hey Hey

I hope I find you all well. We have a bit of a problem. People requested books be set aside for them and received reference numbers. Now the problem is the people have not paid yet and we are holding books for them whilst there are people who want to pay for these books immediately. Please guys honor your agreement so we can move on to bigger and better things.

Thank You

Mike

Question

Dear Mike

I am 29 yrs and in love with some1 whom I got involved with whilst I was still pregnant after the father of my baby left me, he took care of me from then and he is a father to my son. My problem is he resigned from work. About a year ago and his been struggling 2 get a job, his moody and gets angry 4 no reason. I have found employment in MP but home is in GP, I make means to go every weekend or fortnight, I feel neglected @ times because of his behaviour I recently dated someone in MP. The new guy gives complements and moreover attention, this new guy wants 2 marry me but I feel its unfair to drop my bf while his @ his lowest. I love him so much but hate his behaviour.

Plz advise

Confused

78 thoughts on “Confessions – Chapter Eighty Nine

  1. Do u love da mp guy or u jst like the idea of marriage and him giving u all the attention,I say stay with ur man and support him through his difficult tym he ws there for u whn u needed him,he is going through a rough patch and needs all da support he can get!

  2. Thanks Mike, clap once as for Nelisa’s hierarchy of ubushishi… Shame bandla N, you’re really a child, still young, it shows even in your thinking. How can you think that you are good for Dumi and think he deserves better ” YOU” – have you forgotten your shennanigans – beating at school, Thabo ( Dumi’s cousin), Jack (Mr 2 min noodles and his odd amount cash deposits) , Pitbull wife – I rest my case.
    A to Q: I don’t mean to sound judgemental, but just lay off guys bakithi, you have a young baby and you should be concerntrating on your baby right now, and not new MP boyfriend. If it’s not working out with the guy that stood by you whilst preggies, take a break!

  3. Good morning Mike thanks for the great chapter as always, seems uNelisa cannot stay away from trouble leave Dumi alone let him make his own mistakes….. just now your plan back fires. Made the top ten today yepeeee !!!!!

  4. thanks Mike, I hope the child is Indian LOL.

    A 2 Qns

    Confused,
    I really don’t see what’s confusing about this situation, not so long ago you were in the similar situation and this guy was there to support and take care of you. And now that the roles have charged you can’t stand him, that sounds very selfish. It’s devastating for any person to lose their job, so he will be furious anyone would be but the surety of having someone to stand by you and support you makes everything easy. So if the MP guy loses his job as well you are going to move to the next guy right?
    Stand by the person who has been there for you all this time and a lil’ assurance would go a long way.
    lastly stop focusing on other man, take care of the on e you have!!!!!!

    1. i completely agree winth you N. theres another thing people need to look at Marriage is not a fashion statement and she must be a good precedent to her child jumping from one guy to another just so she feels appreciated (what does she contribute the relationship yena)

  5. dear Confused
    U r turning ur back on a mam who supported u when he’s at his lowest. It seems like u r not a stable partner coz u run to the next guy when things are not goin your way. When baby daddy left u replaced him with someone nd nw that he’s not working nd he’s frustrated u also want to replace him? So what’s gonna happen if something goes wrong with the new bf? Dont give up on the man who loved u and supported u when u were at your lowest, why cant u also do the same fr him?

  6. Haaaa N u are such a drama queen. u are still calling yourself a suggarbaby l thought you said u will not date married men again.

    1. LOL Gigi, I m just being truthful no need to sugar-coat the truth. We just need to be brutally honest otherwise we r not being helpful :-)

  7. Thanks Mikeesto

    A2Q

    Confused im going to be brutally honest with you, you have bitchy tendencies….. Your babydaddy ditched you, you moved on to the next one pregant nogals, you move to a new city and already usuthole omunye….. Thats Pretty slutty.

    I fully agree with KaManyosi, you need to lay off the cucumber for a while gosh….. have you no limits?

  8. A@Q: Ke bona ona le nawa fela sesi. I mean the guy stood by you when ur baby daddy left u miserable and now that ur situation is back on track u wanna dump the poor guy 4 someone u hardly know? Think twice sesi, put urselvf on the guy’s shoes. being unemployed is frustrating just bear with him.

    OR MAYBE YOU JUST WANT TO BE MARRIED THATS WHY YOU ARE INTO THE MP GUY?

    1. So man are now defined by merely having a job? SO WHAT IF HE GETS THE JOB AT CONSTRUCTION AND HE MAKES 2500 PM WHICH COVERS FOR NOTHING REALLY… WHAT THEN HUH?

      Spoiled our man se foot. You dont know what you’re talking about, that guy is more men than millions of others coz i sure as hell wouldndt hook up with a knocked up chick….#Food4Though

  9. Lol Nelisa u jst made my day no suger coating da truth!

    Q n A
    Woman let’s nt suger coat it also here the man was thr 4 u nw that u r k n his nt he’s nt gud enuf 4 u.R u dat desparete 4 marriage

  10. Thank U Mike! N rather u leave Dumi 2 & focus on yourself, especially your studies. For a young girl your age I must say U have been thru too much within a very short space of time. In short,,,U R tjatjarag man!

    @Cofused,,,O na le NAWA girl!.No wonder U confused, u dont know what u want, all what matters here is u u u,,,can u for a moment put yourself in the shoes of the guy that was there for u during your pregnancy & imagine what it is that he is going thru emotionally? Huh? Can u do that? U just DONT care akere? The guy was there for you damit! SIES!

  11. Nelisa bandla sisi hiz an old man let him make his mistakes so he learns from them. QnA:kusemhlabeni la sisi that’s y there’s a saying ethi do unto others as you would like them 2 do unto you,support your man as his going through a very difficult time in his life,,,not many men would love u while pregnant n support u.So that guy is special love him back cos his situation might change what then.

  12. @ Jackrozzo I agree with you sometimes we failed to realize how lucky we r to have a man who truelly loves you no matter what, because we r so focused so much on material things. I say to confused stay with your man and support him. He will get a job again u just have to keep encouraging him and not dump him when he is down.

  13. I really hate it when people make up excuses to cover up for ubukhebereshi babo! Sisi, you cheated on your man because he’s moody??? Really? Hayi cha, that’s just a cover up. Anyway, put yourself in your man’s shoes…what would u want him to do if u were him? If tables were turned… Would u want him to leave u in times of need? Why run off with a guy who’s saying all the right stuff to u not because he means it, but because he knows u wana hear it?? You’re not ready for marriage if u wana leave ur man who’s been there for u through pregnancy even though the baby’s not biologically his…for a guy who doesn’t even know the real u. You don’t pack up and leave when things go sour for ur man, you woman up and be strong enough for the both of u.

  14. Ao tjhe Nelisa baby u really need Dumi neh even his stupidness u don’t care u jus need him.I so hate a man with a banana backbone like Dumi nxa he s disgusting me.Lenyalo its a yes even to bull kak cos u will say “Aahhhh for da rest of my life”.

    Q&A
    Confused ur not confused ur horny for every man who rescure u frm one who’s got problems.O qeta ho tseba MP man da last 2minutes ose Ole confused .No keya hana ur not.Monna e mong le e mong o rata ha ele ena ya sebelletsang lelapa n your man needs ur support mme not u giving him a back n u hav to be patient cos he did with u.Imagine pregnancy mme no.Pls love n b patient for motho wa hao.He needs u now more than ever n he gets lonely wen ur far naturally cos he s used to u not bcos o FRA keho hloka spane.Even those moods its bcos he can’t express himself how frustrated he is.MP man must go to hell maan.Stop saying ur confused ur not.Why in da 1st place were u not confused wen he took ole pregnant.Think like a sobber person not like someone who has jus jumped out of a blacklabel court.

  15. Q&A..hey confused,I’m also got tell u like it is! Ur real man loved u nd supported u while u was pregnant of another man’s baby,I mean like who duz dat? This is a great man any woman wuld luv 2 have honestly! Now dat he is in bad space u failing 2 support him!..mybe he is not even moody but becos u’re cheating u end up seeing this that are’nt even there!..if you love him,and not just if but u should luv ur man nd support him through thick and thin nd end ur evils ways at MP..@ 29,u’re an expirienced bitch nd u should knw better.

  16. A to Q:

    Isn’t it amazing how women pray that they find a good man, and when they do, their selfish behaviour comes to life. You were down and out when the father of your baby left in a lurch. This guy came to your rescue, and now that he needs you the most, not only do you go and cheat on him, you’re talking about his “bad moody behavior”. Really??? Well, let me let you in on a little secret about some men (some being the operative word). they find pleasure in sleeping a woman who’s already seeing someone else (it’s an ego-stroking exercise). Now, if you leave you bf for him, this new guy will find another desperate lady like you. This guy is throwing a few lies ( you call them compliments) and is talking about marriage, and wena you’re convinced he’s the guy for you. You are so naive! Sisi wam, I know with absolute certainty, that your mind is pretty much made up, you just want validation from other people. Go right ahead, leave the guy who needs you the most. When things go south with the new guy, just don’t go around saying men are dogs…….

  17. Q& A: hahahahaha! yey’ abantu iyabaqika indaba yakho!! i think you are just enjoying the attention ka MP because he is closer and is giving you some much needed love and attention, but my advise is, do not leave your man just yet!- you are right, you would be kicking a man when he is down and he deserves a lot more than that from you.
    It is also quite irritating when a person constantly feels sorry for himself and does not get up to face his challenges but we all have our dark days, stand by him through all of this no matter how long it takes . let him get back on his feet and see if he continues with the ‘changed’ behavior or if you still feel MP is the right one. If this is still the case then you can leave him– phela just cz a person had your back when you were done, does not mean you should reward him with a love-less marriage, he would also prefer if it if you left thatn marry him out of a sense of obligation and gratitude.
    As much as he was there for you, he is hsowing you how he is when faced with certain challenges, i believe that dating is all about that and now that you know him well -you can make a choice! what if MP was in these shoes are you certain he would handle it better!–it;’s early days. making the right noises ( speaking of marriage) only makes him a charmer for now, the real test will come as you are faced with the challenges of life. Whatever you decide to do see your man (GP) through this low point in his life first! After that let no-one force you into something you dont want feel free to make your OWN decision!!

  18. Hi Mike , i actually enjoy confessions more than the DOAZG….

    the hierachy of sluthhod is just too funny , i just can’t get over it …love you, thanks so much

  19. Lol now nelisa thnks shez better?wht an insult to a word better,A2Qmaybe u ddnt luv the guy u were jst using him so he cn help u raise yo baby,,thts why one shouldn’t fall for chicks wth broken wingz coz once their featherz grow thy fly so high tht thy forget their downs,shame on u sies

  20. @Confused kgane bofebe ke ba eng? not only did you put the poor guy under pressure by moving to MP, yet you had to get another boyfriend in a split second? Do you have any idea how difficult you were whilst you were pregnant and the poor guy had to be there for your up and down emotions? its people like yourself that deserve to be single for life for your lack of appreciation. Tlogela bofebe maan. He might be unemployed today but he might be a Director tomorrow then what?

    1. once the guy gets another job then she will be running back to him. Aybo sisi you are jst greedy and u not thankful for he took you when u had no one. Now usuyabhampa ushaya isthupha esingana nail polish. U a slut finish and klaar, you cant stand difficult situations and the MP gud wud be very unlucky to hv a wife like u.

  21. Well said Prue… I couldnt hv put it better myself… People should jst stop being judgemental nje… Jst cos some1 was there 4 u in time of need does not mean u have 2 spend ur whole life with them… Ppl use others and get used as well everyday… So nje calling this girl on Q&A names nje is jst uncalled for. I mean we do hv freedom of expression but we need 2 respect each other in the process. Ngiyabonga.

  22. @Palesa, translation – translation please, am sure your comment together with all the others written in Sotho/?? are interesting.

  23. People are really promiscious out there.jumping from one guy to the next in a short space of time yikes and then we wonder why the HIV rate is so high amongst black people?doing things behind close doors will only bring u misery my girl. You need to decide whats inportant to you.Temptation is a killer.

  24. Haa haa Nelisa..You are good for Dumi wena…sham…you are just as bad as prostitutes sisi! You sleep with that 2 min old man for money and cell phones…so go jump with your hierachy…U really think u are better than the others..mxm

  25. Ausi a confused, u r not confused but ungreatful bathong & understand that we r not being judgemental but just surprised at what confuses u bcos the man was there for you. Remember, do unto others as you’d want done unto you. Please support him, he may be moody because of the stress of not working & who knows, maybe not having you around & thinking he might loose you as well. He’s at his lowest & needs the love u say u have for him & ur support. Stay away from the MP guy

  26. Mike u do not have to update if there’s nothing to write about.we will understand…in this chapter u just wrote a lot of nothing!!

  27. hi mike
    what happened to misteps of a young wife habe its nice and now niks plsss man may you continue chapters.
    thank you

  28. Prue well said yours win im impressed as well

    Confused wat I can tell we all go through some tests with our men bt we decide how we want to handle the situation. Man have egos they dnt want to sit nd be supported by a woman thy feel it their responsibility to look after the family so all you have to do is carry him up let him get a job nd show him that you love hm even if hisnot working hes still your man running away doesn’t solve a problem u have to lear

  29. Why did u bcum invlove wth da MP guy.Da guys is frustrated men feel smal whn women r working n thy nt . Thy wnt 2 provide nt da athr way round.N I hope u didn’t discuss ur currnt bf wth da MP guy cus he wil knw hw 2 play on ur emotions.Make da rite decison nt cus u feel special

  30. @Abisola, o so tella jwale. Bothata ba hao ke eng coz rona we found sumthing & we enjoyed it. If there’s ‘nothing’ like U put it y dont come up with your own blog or just stop reading this one.

    Eish la tena man! Or call Gorilla for a piece job coz your name wud sound familier to him. Ah suka!Nxa

  31. Ag crap its always a new guy with girls….if u fall in love with another dump the first cause u never loved the first if u up open your heart for another…. Done

  32. i visited da website 2 check da is a new post,so i ended up reading da comments wow u guys rock especially jack zorro#salute u

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