I think a lot of people would expect me to go into panic mode right about now but I was more annoyed than panicked! I cannot believe the nerve of this guy. It is fact that there are a lot of things you need to teach men. I think no matter how much you are in love with a person there is a disrespectful time to show up at their doorstep especially unannounced. If for example a girl is in high school you can not show up at her house after five. My father would skin us both if a guy showed up at my gate that time. I know this is university and here time knows no master but 2am is not a time to show up. I know some wayward girls might find it sexy but I am not a booty call. 2am for a guy on probation means he has not learnt anything at all. I was not going to drag this out though it wasn’t necessary. What was he doing here though so late? I told him I am studying still but I will open up.
When I got to the door he immediately apologized for the lateness of the hour but that was soon replaced with a lustful grin and an immediate, “My Yum Yum”! I told him not to call me that for I wasn’t in the mood and I had work to do. He peeped inside as if to confirm but when he stared longer I turned to look at what he was looking at. My bedroom door was slightly open and he could see a guys foot sticking out off the bed. Benny had just thrown himself onto the bed when he slept. On the one hand it was good that he wasn’t in bed but on the other the fool could be spotted from moon the way he was! I never thought for once that I would ever find myself saying these words but I did, “It is not what you are thinking” but I did! He looked a bit confused then that look turned into anger. He asked me the obvious question if there was a guy in my bed. By the time I answered he had already walked in, pushing me aside as he did. He said that’s why he did not south African girls because there is always drama. What kind of self respecting girl would go out with her boyfriend a few hours ago and end up in bed with another guy that very same evening.
At that moment Benny also woke up courtesy of the commotion. N did not even stir I am sure she was busy dreaming of how else to haunt my family. He asked what was going and who this guy was referring to Python. Benny might be young but he is not that small. Like I said at the beginning he plays rugby for his school even but next to Python he looked like a mere child. There really is a reason why most black bouncers at clubs are foreign. Benny, forever the hot head that he is stood up and was very defensive in his posture. I told them both to calm down but Python would not hear of it. See that’s the problem with men all over the world, they act as though they own women and we are their possessions. Last I checked this man had not put a ring on my finger and we had not even said we are dating. I stood in front of Python really scared of what he would do to this poor little rich boy. I explained to him as quickly as I can that he was my aunts son and they had met very briefly at the hospital. Python did not seem to remember and he asked why he was sleeping over of which I told him he needed a place to study he was in matric. Men have this natural assumption that women or rather girls don’t sleep with or date guys younger than them! I don’t know why older guys feel as though age makes them better! Oh well, Python let his guard down and possibly labelled him as no threat to him. He said he had to go, apologized for the confusion and said he had to go. I tried to stop him but he said he was cool and needed to sleep anyway. I walked him to the elevator and kissed him before heading back to the room.
I found Benny standing by the couches with his arms crossed across his chest. The first thing he said was,
“I can’t believe you are dating foreigners, sies”
he said and he actually spit on the floor with disgust. There really is a problem in this country when it comes to foreign men. I wanted to slap him for that but I was in his flat after all. He called me a plaas jaapie and starry eyed for falling for foreign guys. He told me how bad they were and how I will probably end up a drug mule and in a prison in Thailand. That was a low blow! Why does everyone make the immediate assumption that all foreign men are criminals? He did not even take a moment to try and hear him out and already he knew all about him, his life and where he is from, what he does and his criminal activities! It was this negativity that made me defend Python even more and this led us into a heated argument about foreigners and my freedom of choice. I was angry to the point of turning red!
In the midst of this my phone rang. I thought it was Python so I had to pick it up to make sure he was ok. I had no time really to deal with boys who thought they were men. I was surprised though by the caller I.D. It was K my gay knight in shining armour. I hadn’t spoken to him in weeks even though he had left a few missed calls and texts every now and again just to check up on me. I even almost called him a few days ago when Ayanda had taken me to the station. The drama in my life but even for him it was rather late for him to call.
I picked up the phone rather tentatively because I was not certain. On the other side of the line it wasn’t even K. Maybe he had lost his phone. It was a woman speaking. She spoke in Tswana and I told her I didn’t understand her. To be honest as South Africans we are ignorant about each others languages especially Zulus and Xhosas we do not want to learn all these other languages. We can say a few words in Sotho or Tswana but that’s just it.
She translated and started crying. From the sobs only a few words came out clearly
“I have been going through my sons phone calling people…”
Why was she calling people and where was he?
“They beat my son”
“Because he was different”
“And now he is dead!”
I sat down on the floor where I stood!
WE ARE A NATION THAT HAS EXPERIENCED SO MUCH SIMPLY BECAUSE OUR PEOPLE WHERE BORN OF THE WRONG SKIN COLOUR. TODAY INSTEAD OF LEARNING THAT WE ARE ALL HUMAN BEINGS WE HAVE TAKEN THE HATRED THAT THE WHITE PEOPLE GAVE US AND TRANSFERRED IT TO FELLOW AFRICAN BROTHERS AND SISTERS THAT RESIDE AMONGST US! IS THIS WHAT NELSON MANDELA FOUGHT FOR? WE ARE A BETTER PEOPLE WHEN WE OPEN OUR MINDS TO ACCEPTING OTHERS. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO TATA YOU HAVE TAUGHT US SO MUCH!
Michael Nkululeko Maphoto (fb page)
Question: If you have ever slept with or dated a younger man, how many years younger was he to you? Do you feel embarrassed at being with a younger man