Have you ever read the book Great Expectations I think its by Charles Dickens. Pip the main character in the book has all these expectations about where his life will go and has all these dreams of how it should happen. He even goes to the extent of forgetting his station when he falls in love as well as when he gets help from a criminal and wants to rescind it. Well I had great expectations about my coming to Johannesburg and there was no way in hell I was going to allow anyone, my dad included to ruin those expectations. I had sweated for my matric grades and I had not gotten that bursary because I was pretty. I was here by the sweat on my brow and the conviction I had had to study till it hurts. I was not going anywhere even if he threatened to disown me. He will get over it. I was not going to Durban to blend in with another 3million Zulus! I was going to make my stand! Zulu culture dictates that a good young Zulu woman cannot speak up to her father even if he is wrong. For all intensive purposes when it comes to academics I was a brilliant child and this is one field I was not going to compromise on! Punished because I had come home with a weave! They must just be strong shem!
I don’t know about rules but I do have morals. Rules are meant to be broken and everyone will call you a rebel for it. Morals on the other hand, well the same people will call you names and disown you for it. My father had that one rule that his decision was final. I guess we were about to discover what happens when an irresistible force meets an immovable force. That of course being me and my father respectively. I met the soccer players friend by the elevator. His first comment was “A sestre, dia dang ne e le mischeck e serious blind, mara fede”
I had no idea what he just said but it sounded like a threat. I thought the police had their man? Anyway whatever he said it was not as though I gave a fuck. He didn’t even speak proper vernacular or English so I wasn’t even sure what he meant. I don’t know why these township boys think its cool to speak this funny talk but its really crass. Even a Cape Coloured spoke to you in that tsotsi equivalent of Afrikaans you would run like hell. It just makes them sound like criminals. I just ignored him all the way down the elevator. I don’t know him! I have no interest in knowing him! Don’t forget Gorilla had not yet done his part. I had even forgotten. I needed to call him off.
When I got downstairs I tried to forget all my problems and be happy to meet Tebogo’s girlfriend. I did not know that Tebogo drove. He had a silver Polo and you know when someone says a car just suits a person’s personality, this one was perfect him. He was wearing a tangerine cardigan. I say this because I was noticing the trend. His girlfriend was actually quite pleasant. Her name was Tlhologelo, complicated I know, they had to say it three times for me to figure it out. Eventually we settled on using her other name which was Natalie! Its not my fault that every South African can’t speak Zulu. We are the dominant population and we win every competition that needs you to vote in on Tv. Turns out she was also studying Law but at UJ that’s why he had been so eager to make us meet. Every guy has a fantasy of his girlfriend having hot friends. I know this for a fact. My exes would even ask at times why I was friends with some girls over the others. They would not directly say it but I noticed the girls they wanted me to be friends were girls even I thought could compete with me. Its very rare to find a girl crew of just beautiful people unless its some kind of a music group. We would kill each other with egos and jealousy. In every crew of girls there are only one or two stunners then the rest of the minions stand to compliment the stunners. Girls won’t readily admit it but its fact and the same goes with guys in university. One guy they hang with drives whilst the rest are scrubs ready to flag him down for a lift! They then make sure that they have enough influence to remain relevant in that passenger list.
We decided to go fo McDonalds by Campus Square. I hadn’t had McDonalds’ in ages and I quite looked forward to it. It was my suggestion and I offered to pay for it. She seemed fascinated by the fact that I had offered to pay and teased about having turned down her boyfriend’s chicken licken. I had even forgotten about that. I told her chicken licken was only good when nursing a hangover not when you still had to walk home. I loved this couple. They genuinely found each other funny, had a good banter about them and held hands even when he drove… In a manual car at that! It was scary. When people are in love you can see it! Maybe I had been quick to judge South African guys. Here was a guy who clearly totally adored his girlfriend and was not even threatened at being introduced to new women by him. You could see how he paid attention to detail and fussed over her. In return she seemed supportive and just as loving as him. Most of my friends and I am afraid to say myself included would not stand for this shit! We want to own the man and make sure that we throttle him so much that no one else must ever befriend him ever again. If I date him I should be the last girl he should ever talk to because I feel so threatened by every female he will meet after me. Even colleagues at work must not call him because he is my man! Its a wonder how he got to this age without me!? That’s our mentality.
We hung out a bit longer and when we let I bought some food for N. That girl hardly ever cooked but being pregnant I figured her appetite would change. Natalie and I arranged a “play date” for this really was what it was. I had already said I needed a wider circle of friends so this was working out in my favour. It could be tricky though if they broke up for I would have to pick a side and follow one friend. Eventually they took me home.
When I got to my room I responded to my father’s message. I think this was my first act of open defiance! I was in open rebellion. I had to make my stand otherwise I would end up by the coast!
“Baba ngeke ngikwazi ukuya eUKZN nginethezekile lana futhi nomfundaze wami uzothathwa uma ngishintsha ama Nyuvesi”
Loosely translated, “Baba, I will not be moving to UKZN. I am happy here. The bursary will not allow me in any case!”
I knew this would not be well received but how bad could it be. I spoke to N a bit and offered to make her food
“Uma ufuna ukuqhubeka ube yindodakazi yami futhi ube yilunga lalomndeni uzoya eThekwini ngizothatha iLoan umakudingeka”
Loosely translated “If you want to remain my daughter and part of this family you are going to Durban! I will get a loan for you if I must!”
I was screwed!
Michael Nkululeko Maphoto
Question: If your partner has bad friends you found already there when you first met, do you think its your right to make him choose between those friends and you?
I WILL POST THIS WEEKEND. TOMORROW EXPECT CONFESSIONS….